12.31.04

Dogmeat Purveyor Purchases Dodger Dogs

Posted in Food at 6:52 pm by

In a development almost as terrifying as Rupert Murdoch’s brief ownership of the Los Angeles Dodgers, the venerable Dodger Dog is now under the stewardship of the Hormel Corporation.


(bad news for everyone)

Though a company spokesperson claims that Hormel “will in no way change any recipe or the grilling and the whole nine yards up at Dodger Stadium”, I’m not about to find out firsthand, and you shouldn’t either.

Death Of The Monobrow

Posted in Fashion at 1:19 pm by

Says Sam Frank, “insert Randy Johnson joke, here”. From The New York Times’ Andrew Jacobs.

In a quiet revolution sweeping the blue-collar precincts of metropolitan New York, mechanics, firemen and construction workers – most of them insistently heterosexual – are unapologetically doting on their eyebrows. Inspired by “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” and the well-coiffed rap artists on BET, cowed by tweezers-wielding girlfriends and goaded by wisecracking co-workers, they are plucking and waxing as never before. And they don’t lie about it.

“Eyebrows were the last frontier,” said Louis DeJesus, a hair stylist whose Bronx salon, International Nails and Beauty, started seeing an influx of men about two years ago. “Everyone’s doing it now. And once a guy starts doing it, he gets addicted.”

From the immigrant enclaves of Queens to the minimalls of Long Island, modest salons that once catered to women find themselves inundated by primping, preening men, most of them young working-class guys who tend to spend their weekends at dance clubs. Even the Gotti brothers, the ones with their own reality television show, have embraced a minimalist approach to facial hair.

Carol Cedeno, a manicurist at Tom’s Scissorhands, a salon in Paterson, N.J., has seen the trend. “A lot of the guys used to be embarrassed, but now they just walk in and say it proudly: ‘I want my eyebrows done,’ ” she said, noting that her salon offers a wax job for $5. “Sometimes their eyebrows end up looking more dainty than their girlfriends’.”

When he first started tweezing last year, Al Bernal, a 31-year-old auto mechanic from Newark, said his friends called his sexuality into question. “They said I looked, you know, gay,” said Mr. Bernal, whose style is maintained by his fiancée. “Of course, these days they do it, too, and they love it because they get a lot more attention from chicks.”


(hard to believe this guy isn’t getting any action)

Mutumbo’s Reign of Terror

Posted in Basketball at 11:16 am by

In the wake of his attempt to rearrange the face of LeBron James the other night, let us reflect on the long and storied career of Dikembe Mutumbo.
While not quite “The People’s Elbow”, Houston’s Mutumbo has dished out punishment to multiple generations of NBA stars, as ESPN’s research deparment helpfully reports :

April 20, 2004: Kenyon Martin, hit in the eye and retaliated by clubbing Mutombo across the arm. Received a technical foul
March 31, 2003: Yao Ming, hit in the throat. Mutombo assessed flagrant foul
Feb. 4, 2002: Vince Carter, hit in the gut
May 16, 2001: Vince Carter, hit in the head. Carter did not return to Game 6 of the Eastern Conference playoffs
May 6, 2001: Chris Childs, broken nose
Feb. 26, 2001: Ray Allen, broken nose
Jan. 13, 2001: Corey Maggette, eye trauma
Dec. 28, 2000: Chauncey Billups, hit in the mouth, four stitches, fractured front tooth
Feb. 6, 1999: Jayson Williams, broken nose
May 4, 1999: Mark Strickland, broken nose
May 8, 1999: Lindsey Hunter, left eye
May 8, 1999: Christian Laettner, cut on face
April 9, 1999: Chris Childs, lost a tooth; Marcus Camby, shot to throat; Larry Johnson, hit in the head; Patrick Ewing, hit in the head
March 4, 1999: Kevin Willis, injured shoulder. Missed several games
May 6, 1997: Dennis Rodman, retaliated and ejected with second technical foul
April 12, 1997: Tom Gugliotta, broken nose
Jan. 30, 1997: Antoine Carr, knocked senseless
Jan. 4, 1997: Charles Oakley, four stitches to the lip
Oct. 22, 1996: Michael Jordan, bloodied nose (preseason game)
April 10, 1994: Robert Horry, hit in the head, fell to the floor
Dec. 30, 1993: Chris Webber; Mutombo later ejected for taunting Chris Gatling
Dec. 28, 1991: Robert Parish, hit the floor
Nov. 29, 1991: Ricky Pierce, 12 stitches in forehead

Vescey On Karl, Bzedelik

Posted in Basketball at 11:01 am by

Peter Vescey is never more attractive than when he’s echoing CSTB. From Friday’s New York Post.

Imagine if George Karl had as much of an in with Nuggets’ owner E. Stanley Kroenke as widespread reports seem to indicate.

If that were true, the indubitably erudite coach with 16 seasons of experience (some of it actually good) would’ve been coaching the team last night when the sizzling Sixers came to Denver.

At least you’d think so.

There’s certainly nothing left to the imagination about Karl’s honorable intentions. He wants the job, that’s for sure, letting it be known he can walk away from his talk as an NBA TV analyst with no notice and without a hitch.

Not only did Karl deliver an immediate high, hard pitch for the Nuggets’ positon, you know, just in case interim Michael Cooper fails to qualify for a permanent promotion from assistant to the freshly terminated Jeff Bzdelik, but he’s already generously offering free advice.

The first order of business should be to unite the Nuggets, preached Karl, who left the Bucks disjointed and disorganized two summers ago after the team united against him.

Don’t misunderstand; it’s certainly not unusual for players to rebel against their coach after hearing the same old spiel for five seasons.

Still, no matter how much (or modest) of a relationship Kroenke supposedly has with Karl off the court, he has to be looking a little bit funny at a guy who becomes so negative at the end of each coaching tour. Down the stretch in Milwaukee and long afterward all we heard out of Karl is what’s wrong with today’s players, and the league, and the game.

In itself, I suggest, that should be grounds to incriminate Karl and turn off prospective employers who pay an average of $3 million or more annually to sideline gurus to get constructive leaders, not destructive ones.

Kroenke also must be thinking to himself: “If ABC doesn’t value Karl enough to make him its lead analyst over the ancient and ailing Hubie Brown why should I be excited about having him?”

As for Bzdelik’s dismissal, it caught me by surprise. Despite his lame duck status ” a detrimentally transparent message players habitually pounce on and exploit ” and eight losses in nine games, including six straight (five in which Carmellow Anthony did not play due to a sprained ankle), there were too many critical injuries to crucial personnel to lay the blame on the coach.

The good news is, Bzdelik received several copies of those morally-righteous Carmellow Anthony videos as lovely parting gifts.

The Los Angeles Angels (That Play In Anaheim)

Posted in Baseball at 10:39 am by

Angels owner Artie Moreno continues to battle with the Anaheim city council and according to the LA Times’ Bill Shaikin, there are some crazy compromise solutions being suggested.

 It was standing-room only in the lobby of Anaheim City Hall, with civic leaders and baseball executives gathering for a celebratory news conference. The Walt Disney Co. had agreed to buy the Angels, keep them in town for decades and pay for most of an ambitious and costly stadium renovation.

And, as city officials happily noted on that sunny afternoon in 1996, their team no longer would be known as the California Angels. The city would contribute to the renovation, and in return the team would be called the Anaheim Angels.

“After being known as California for the last 30 years, this team is now going to be called Anaheim,” Mayor Tom Daly said then. “That’s huge.”

Not so huge, however, for the city to insist upon contractual language that would force the team to call itself the Anaheim Angels or market itself using that name. The stadium lease agreement demands only that the team name “include the name Anaheim therein,” providing Angel owner Arte Moreno with a potential loophole to exploit should he decide to call his team the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.

“There’s no question the city could have written a lease provision that would have given the team no wiggle room. This provision does give the team some wiggle room,” said Robert Jarvis, professor of law at Nova Southeastern University in Ft. Lauderdale, Fla., and co-author of a sports law textbook.

The City Council has voted to sue if Moreno implements a name change, arguing he would breach the lease. City officials have spurned a change to the Los Angeles Angels and dismissed as ludicrous a compromise proposal: the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.

No matter how geographically nonsensical that compromise might appear, Moreno could argue it satisfies the requirement that the team name “include the name Anaheim therein.” According to several contract law professors interviewed by The Times, the city would have a reasonable ” but not airtight ” legal case and should thus consider a negotiated solution to a dispute that city officials vow will not be negotiated.

“Imagine the city fathers and mothers trying to explain how they wrote a contract that allowed the team to be called the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim,” Jarvis said. “And, from the team’s point of view, you wouldn’t want the P.R. nightmare of saying we want to be called X but we have to be called Y. It would be a terrible fiasco for the Angels.

“This is not something for which there is a black-and-white answer. As a result, I have no doubt the parties would reach a compromise. Neither one will want to go to court and lose.”

Yet the city might sue even if Moreno does not change the team name. By selling his team simply as the Angels ” and removing the city name from uniforms, tickets, merchandise and publicity outlets ” city officials contend Moreno has violated the lease. The City Council could authorize such a suit at its Jan. 11 meeting.

BC Wins Z-List Bowl Game

Posted in Gridiron at 1:10 am by

The current barrage of college bowls has left this correspondent a little dizzy. When Martha Reeves sang “don’t forget the Motor City”, she probably wasn’t talking about the Motor City Bowl. Though I did forget that Connecticut had a Division 1-A football program, what with the state’s rich history in the sport (Brian “B.D.” Dowling, Giants home games at Yale, exciting touch football games with the extended Bunnybrains clan + Peter Lawford).

If the Rose Bowl is “The Grandaddy Of Them All”, can the Continental Tire Bowl be described as Your Very Unattractive Cousin?

All of that said, I’ve seen few moments in a Garbage Bowl as worth of an out-loud “what the fuck”, as BC kicker Ryan Ohliger turning a fake FG into a 21 yard TD run against North Carolina, just moments after Eagles QB Paul Peterson was hauled off the field with a broken leg. Ohliger — alll 5′ 9″ of him — snuck through the Carolina D like he was running for his life. Which he might’ve been. After BC pissed away something like $13 million in BCS money with their collapse against Syracuse, this was a nice way to finish.

120,000+ Dead, President’s Vacation Interrupted

Posted in We Aren't The World at 12:47 am by

In consideration of the United States pledging $35 million in aid to those stricken by the recent tsunami in Indonesia (roughly a fifth of the Iraq war’s costs per day), you might want to pass some of your holiday gelt in the direction of Oxfam International

Though Oxfam have a reputation for fiscal responsibility, sadly, not one penny of your donation will ensure additional news coverage on the condition of supermodel Petra Nemcova, injured in a tidal wave last weekend.

12.30.04

Luxemburgo Hired By Real Madrid

Posted in Football at 11:59 pm by

Stuck in la liga’s 5th place despite a superstar lineup (and Steinbrenner-esque payroll) Real Madrid have tapped former Brazil national manager Wanderley Luxemburgo to become Los Galacticos’ 3rd manager of the season. Jose Antonio Camacho was sacked three weeks into the current campaign ; Manager no. 2, Mariano Garcia Remon will remain with the club in an advisory capacity.

Earlier this month, Luxemburgo lead Santos to its 2nd Brazilian club championship in 3 years. Luxemburgo has won 5 Brazilian titles on his career, two with Palmieras and one each with Corintians, Crueziro and Santos.

Morality Lessons From Fergie

Posted in Football at 10:43 pm by

From the Guardian’s Dominic Fifield in Friday’s edition :

Manchester United bowed to the inevitable last night and opted against contesting the charge of violent conduct levelled by the Football Association against Wayne Rooney but not before Sir Alex Ferguson called the FA’s disciplinary procedures as “flawed” and “immoral”.

The 19-year-old will miss Premiership games against Middlesbrough and Tottenham, as well as the FA Cup tie with Exeter City, after the FA’s video panel studied footage of him pushing Bolton’s defender Tal Ben Haim in the face in United’s 2-0 win at Old Trafford on Boxing Day.

United had the option of denying the charge, though that would merely have seen an FA disciplinary commission meet this morning to discuss the issue.

The Old Trafford club would have had no representation at that hearing, with the most likely outcome being confirmation of the three-match ban regardless.

Tino’s A Yank (Again)

Posted in Baseball at 7:30 pm by

MLB.com is reporting that free agent 1B Tino Martinez has passed a physical and is expected to sign with the Yankees shortly. The League’s house organ helpfully adds,

Martinez signed a one-year deal, though exact terms were not available. He will likely share time at first base and DH with Jason Giambi. He also gives New York a viable option at first base should Giambi experience any health problems.

Or if New York can figure out a way to buy out the rest of Giambi’s deal. Martinez’ return to the Bronx should make the market for Carlos Delgado a bit clearer, if nothing else.


(not only is Tino a little old for tagging, but the “M”‘s upside down)

Minaya’s Beltran Courtship

Posted in Baseball at 4:19 pm by

From the Boston Herald’s Michael Silverman :

    In a move that bears more than a passing resemblance to his Thanksgiving dinner wooing session of Pedro Martinez, Mets general manager Omar Minaya is poised to make his second – and even bigger – impact signing of this offseason by going after Carlos Beltran, the top prize of this entire free agent market and a name that many had already fitted for pinstripes next year.

 According to a National League source familiar with the Mets’ thinking this entire offseason, the Mets are going to begin a pursuit of Beltran next week with the same intensity and style that they devoted to winning over Martinez. The Martinez pursuit culminated successfully two weeks ago when the right-hander inked a four-year, $53 million deal.

     Here in Boston, that deal made a splash with ripples to be felt until the Red Sox can demonstrate that they can replace the results from the three-time Cy Young winner. In the Bronx, losing out on Martinez never turned into a big deal, since no one besides Steinbrenner ever considered hiring the hurler to be a top priority.

     Beltran is another story.

     Beltran will turn 28 in April, meaning his best years may very well be ahead of him. And the center fielder has already turned in a body of work that makes any red-blooded owner, general manager or casual fan drool. He is without a doubt the golden child of this free agent crop, and that is why his agent, Scott Boras, has made his boldest request yet for any of his current free agents: 10 years for $200 million, or $20 million a season.

     The Astros are believed to have made the one and only bid so far, six years and $96 million, or $16 million a season. Tigers owner Mike Ilitch is itching to wire cash into Beltran’s bank account. But even though one Boras client, Pudge Rodriguez, signed in Motown last year, it is hard to imagine Beltran doing the same. All during this hot stove season, the Yankees were supposed to be biding their time before making an offer that would top the Astros and any other pretenders to the throne of major league cash dispensers.

     Lately, the Yankees have been playing a cat-and-mouse game with the Diamondbacks over a trade for Randy Johnson, arguably the one player the Yankees need most. Beltran is a close second for many reasons, none greater than the reality that Steinbrenner has always enjoyed collecting the biggest prizes he sees, $25 million luxury tax bills be damned.

     So far this winter, the Yankees have added the likes of Carl Pavano, Jaret Wright and Tony Womack, hardly back-page types.

     Meanwhile, the Mets have been plotting the Beltran move, which should not come as the biggest surprise. Having already held trade discussions with the Cubs about Sammy Sosa and the Red Sox about Manny Ramirez this offseason, landing a marquee outfielder is high on the Mets’ to-do list. Snagging Beltran would be the ultimate accomplishment of Minaya’s already busy and productive offseason.

     Emboldened by his success with Martinez, Minaya is going to employ the same face-to-face strategy with Beltran in order to pitch the perks of playing for New York’s other team.

If you can think of even ONE perk associated with playing for the Mets, please let us know. Besides the obvious ones, of course (getting to borrow Piazza’s Savatage CD’s, use of the parking space previously reserved for Donald Manes, shoeshines and backrubs from Joe McEwing, etc.)

Gammons Says Unit Deal Is Done

Posted in Baseball at 1:51 pm by

D-Backs get the disgruntled, revenge-vowing Vazquez, two additional warm bodies and loot, Yankees get Johnson and inch ever close to the $300 million payroll.

From ESPN.com :

Peter Gammons reported earlier Thursday that the on-again, off-again trade would be completed once the teams agree on the amount of money and the minor leaguers to be included in the deal. Gammons also reported that in addition to Vazquez, the deal would include catching prospect Dioneer Navarro, at least one other prospect and about $8 million going to the Diamondbacks in exchange for the 41-year-old lefty.

According to Gammons’ sources, Arizona will not immediately deal Vazquez to another team, but will continue to talk to interested teams, including Baltimore, Philadelphia, Detroit and Texas.

Jermaine O’Neal On the Brawl’s Fallout

Posted in Basketball at 10:15 am by

David Newton in The State.com, interviewing recently reinstated Indiana Pacer Jermaine O’Neal.

O™Neal said if the courts choose to reinstate his suspension he will accept that just as he did the original penalty. But he contends that all the suspensions, including Artest™s seasonlong ban, were excessive.

He said those who witnessed the incident on television saw only 20 percent of what happened. He resents that many in the media have placed the blame on players more than fans.

œThey made sure they just showed us hitting people, O™Neal said. œThere™ s a reason why we were running around. There™s 15 of us, and there™s thousands of them.

œI saw a lot of people say the NBA is too hip-hoppish. What is too hip-hoppish? What does our preference of music have to do with who we are? I™m pretty sure a lot of hockey players and baseball players listen to rock ™n™ roll and heavy metal. Does that determine who they are?

O™Neal pointed out that a Texas Rangers player threw a chair into the stands this past baseball season and broke a woman™s nose.

œIt wasn™t talked about for seven weeks, he said. œThe (NBA) is 85 percent black. All of a sudden we™re under scrutiny for who we are.”

Ron Artest, Future Knick?

Posted in Basketball at 10:08 am by

After the strangling of PJ Carlesimo, who would’ve bet on Latrell Sprewell becoming a fan favorite in NYC? The NY Daily News’ Frank Isola fantasizes about current Public Enemy No. 1, suspended Pacers F Ron Artest, ending up in a Knicks uniform.

Latrell Sprewell was rescued from NBA purgatory five years ago by the Knicks, who were willing to take a chance on a talented player with a troubled past. The risk was well worth the reward as Sprewell helped the Knicks reach one NBA Finals and two conference finals.

Next summer, the Knicks may try to take the same gamble on Ron Artest, who currently is serving a season-long suspension for his part in a brawl last month in Detroit. Sprewell sees plenty of similarities between himself and Artest and feels that New York would be an ideal place for Artest to get a second chance.

“With Ron, he would probably do well wherever he goes,” Sprewell said. “But he’d definitely fit in well here. He played here, he’s from this area and I’m sure New Yorkers would love him.

“Feeling wanted helped me. It gives you a sense that you’re welcomed. You don’t feel like everyone is against you. That was important.”

The Knicks essentially stole Sprewell from Golden State, acquiring him for John Starks, Chris Mills and Terry Cummings. Prying Artest from the Pacers will not be easy if for no other reason than president Larry Bird would probably be reluctant to trade Artest to a conference rival whose boss, Isiah Thomas, is Bird’s longtime bitter enemy.

Thomas and assistant coaches Mark Aguirre and George Glymph coached Artest in Indiana and the consensus among league officials is that Thomas will make a play for Artest.

“I don’t know why you’d get rid of him,” Sprewell said. “I don’t see Indiana trading him. I wouldn’t be looking to move him because of that incident.”

Cards Considering Alomar

Posted in Baseball at 9:55 am by

Despite his diminished skills, 2B Roberto Alomar —- a probable Hall Of Famer assuming you can erase his Mets tenure from your memory — continues to find someone willing to employ him. Albiet at a fraction of the salary he once earned.

The NY Post’s Joel Sherman is reporting that when and if the Randy Johnson/Javier Vazquez deal is completed, the Diamondbacks might attempt to trade Vazquez to Baltimore in exchange for some combination of pitchers Erik Bedard, Jorge Julio and outfielders Jay Gibbons and Luis Matos. Given Baltimore’s desperation for frontline pitching, the way they were rebuffed by all of the big name free agent hurlers and the unlikelihood that Arizona want any part of Vazquez’ contract, this seems plausible.

No further word on whether or not Sidney Ponson’s drunken escapades with and without a Jet Ski will give the Orioles just cause to void his contract, but you can bet they’ve considered it.

Stephon Torments T-Wolves

Posted in Basketball at 12:24 am by

There’s been no small amount of bitching & moaning from this corner that the ’04/05 Knicks are going nowhere with the erratic Stephon Marbury running the show. But on Wednesday night, against one of the Western Conference’s powerhouses and the reigning MVP, Marbury showed that when he’s at the top of his game, the Knicks resemble something far greater than a middling club. And on that note, New York moved to 3 games above .500 for the first time in 4 1/2 years.

If Kurt Thomas hadn’t harrassed KG into a 7 for 17 night, it’s doubtful the Knicks would’ve held off the Timberwolves.

No doubt mindful of the need to continue providing for his family, there were no incidents involving Father Of The Year Latrell Sprewell and Knicks owner James Dolan.

12.29.04

It’s Official : Inter-Web Fucks With Life’s Precious Moments

Posted in The Internet at 11:49 pm by

From John Markoff in Thursday’s New York Times :

The average Internet user in the United States spends three hours a day online, with much of that time devoted to work and more than half of it to communications, according to a survey conducted by a group of political scientists.

The survey found that use of the Internet has displaced television watching and a range of other activities. Internet users watch television for one hour and 42 minutes a day, compared with the national average of two hours, said Norman H. Nie, director of the Stanford Institute for the Quantitative Study of Society, a research group that has been exploring the social consequences of the Internet.

“People don’t understand that time is hydraulic,” he said, meaning that time spent on the Internet is time taken away from other activities.

A 2000 study by the researchers that reported increasing physical isolation among Internet users created a controversy and drew angry complaints from some users who insisted that time they spent online did not detract from their social relationships.

However, the researchers said they had now gathered further evidence showing that in addition to its impact on television viewing, Internet use has lowered the amount of time people spend socializing with friends and even sleeping.

According to the study, an hour of time spent using the Internet reduces face-to-face contact with friends, co-workers and family by 23.5 minutes, lowers the amount of time spent watching television by 10 minutes and shortens sleep by 8.5 minutes.

The remaining period spent using the Internet reduces time spent helping Scott Weiland violate his parole by 18 minutes a day.

Rod Kanehl, RIP

Posted in Baseball at 11:13 pm by

Rod Kanehl, one of the original 1962 New York Mets, passed away two weeks ago at the age of 70. Kanehl, who played at every position other than pitcher and catcher during his 3 years with the Mets, had previously spent 8 years in the Yankees system.

Long Island Continues To Rule

Posted in Food at 9:51 pm by

On the same day we rejoice in Snapple’s dissing of Staten Island, let us praise the good people of Long Island. Without Long Island, we’d have no Amy Fisher, Nihilistics, Misguided, Lee Ranaldo, Phantom Tollbooth, Howard Stern, pine-cone H.S. football sodomy, Joel Rifkin, the hottest moments of Julius Erving’s career, teenage turkey tossers, reasons to chant “Beat Your Wife, Potvin”, Bill Pulsipher in a Long Island Ducks uniform, or perhaps best of all, hot dog vendors doubling as prostitutes.

On the site of the former Raynor’s Fried Chicken, no less.

Jerry Orbach, RIP

Posted in The World Of Entertainment at 6:53 pm by

Veteran stage and screen actor, Tony award winner and ‘Law And Order” fixture Jerry Orbach has succumbed to prostate cancer at the age of 69.

Orbach’s 12 year run as alcoholic Det. Lenny Briscoe on Dick Wolf’s formulaic “L&O” provided a transcendent moment or two in a dismal broadcast TV landscape.

Chicago’s WMVP Boots Mariotti

Posted in Sports Radio at 6:30 pm by

Jay Mariotti’s radio show on the flapship station of nemesis Jerry Reinsdorf’s White Sox and Bulls lasted almost 10 months. From the Chicago Tribune’s Teddy Greenstein.

Jay Mariotti is off Chicago’s airwaves, and he says his departure from ESPN Radio’s WMVP-AM 1000 is the result of the station’s desire to curry favor with the White Sox and Bulls.

Mariotti said the station asked him to tone down his criticism of the Bulls and White Sox, whose games are broadcast on WMVP and whose contracts are close to expiring.

The station is in negotiations with the teams on a new deal.

A source said Mariotti received a written edict last month ordering him to ease up on the Bulls and Sox. Station executives followed that up with oral reminders.

Both sides finally had enough.

“We agreed that if I wouldn’t agree to their editorial conditions, then I should leave,” Mariotti said Tuesday.

“I’m not going to compromise my integrity to do favors on the air for the White Sox and the Bulls. When they ask me to treat two teams differently than the others, that’s a red flag for me, and it has been happening quite a bit over the last few months.”

Mariotti also has feuded publicly with Sox broadcaster Hawk Harrelson, Reinsdorf’s friend and adviser.

Their verbal war nearly escalated into a fistfight in the press box at the Metrodome in Minneapolis before and after a Sox-Twins game in July.

Told Tuesday that Mariotti was off the air in Chicago, Harrelson couldn’t hide his glee.

“I’m happy for the fans,” Harrelson said, “because he’s a vicious guy.

“I said he wouldn’t have that [radio] job long and I don’t think he’ll be a columnist much longer. He never lets the truth get in the way of a story. The city will be a lot better off without him.”

If Kurt Warner Ain’t Starting, He’ll Be Departing

Posted in Gridiron at 5:43 pm by

Apparently, the selfless act of Kurt Warner couldn’t last all the way to Week 17.

“My whole goal was to show people I could throw the football, I could lead and I could win,” Warner said. “I think I showed people I could do that. Coming in, nobody had any expectations for this football team and to be a leader of a team that was 5-2 and had the second best record in the NFC, I’m happy with that.”

Much as I love second-guessing Tom Couhglin’s decision to give Eli Manning the Giants’ starting QB job with the team still squarely in playoff contention, it’s pretty astonishing that Warner is so proud of having the second-best record in the NFC…after 7 games. I mean, he was also the leader of a team that was 5-4 and had lost 3 of its last 4 games.

Karl, Jacskon, Amongst Vultures Circling Over Denver

Posted in Basketball at 10:39 am by

The Rocky Mountain News’ Chris Tomasson is reporting that former Bucks/Sonics coach George Karl and ex-Lakers/Bulls zenmaster Phil Jackson are amongst the names in the mix for the Denver Nuggets coaching position , if and when GM Kiki Vandegwhe decides not to give the job to Michael Cooper on a permenent basis.

I can understand Jackson’s name popping up in reference to every NBA opening — unless of course Doc Rivers left the Celtics — but Karl is a mystery to me. The Tar Heel alum took a boatload of money to lead the Bucks and got nothing done, despite some serious talent that he had a hand in assembling. If Vandegwhe’s gripe with deposed coach Jeff Bzdelik is that Carmelo Anthony & crew had stopped listening, what’s on Karl’s resume that that would preclude a similar result?

Unit/Vasquez Deal Back On?

Posted in Baseball at 10:13 am by

Javier Vazquez, Brad Halsey, Abel Gomez and a bag of cash for Randy Johnson. Supposedly. And the 41 year old Unit gets a contract extension. How this might impact, if at all, the Yankees’ ability to outbid the Mets and Astros for Carlos Beltran, I hate to guess…only because I suspect it will make no difference whatsoever.

Snapple Dissess Smelly Borough

Posted in The Marketplace at 7:35 am by

From the New York Daily News’ Lisa Colangelo and David Saltonstall :

Snapple, the unofficial drink of New York City, may need a lesson in good humor – not to mention good taste.

On its Web site, company officials had the gall to poke fun at Staten Island – then hurriedly pulled the punch line when contacted by the Daily News.

In explaining how to play Snapple’s “Real Facts Game,” a fill-in-the-blank question asked, “The most recognized smell in the world is —–?”

Then came the company’s insulting answer: “No, it’s not Staten Island. It’s coffee.”

City Councilman James Oddo (R-S.I.) said the putdown dredged up old stereotypes about the borough – the infamous Fresh Kills landfill closed in 2001 – and left a bitter taste in his mouth.

“This from a company allegedly teaming with New York to market the city,” said an incredulous Oddo. “That is one hell of a partner we have. Normally one has to be dealing with France to be treated so badly by a ‘friend.’”

Oh, for fuck’s sake. First of all, the stereotype in question might be old, but can Oddo say it wasn’t deserved? And isn’t there a better way of stressing the beauty and splendor of Staten Island than resorting to tired francophobe bullshit? What have the French ever done to Staten Island?