Music Video In The Pre-Nigel Dick Era

Posted in History's Not Happening, Rock Und Roll at 10:54 pm by

The Embarrassment, “I’m A Don Juan”, link swiped from Failed Pilot.

Lucchino Was Right : Evil Empire, al Qaeda Link Confirmed

Posted in Baseball, Total Fucking Terror at 8:44 pm by

“Just because your team signs Carl Pavano, Jared Wright, and has the 2nd best shortstop in New York doesn’t mean you have to go and prove George W Bush right about…. something or other. Get a grip, your team could be starting Chan Ho Park voluntarily!” writes Marc Perlman, who provides a link to the following CNN report.

(surely someone possesses the photoshop skillz in order to place a Yankee cap atop his head?)

An American computer programmer who later became an FBI informant told a British court during 17 days of testimony that he ran training camps in Pakistan for Islamic militants and nurtured a generation of homegrown British terrorists.

Mohammed Junaid Babar’s testimony in the yearlong trial of five men convicted Monday of a plot to bomb targets in London revealed how disaffected Britons were trained for terrorism in Pakistan, where many have family ties.

A naturalized American from Pakistan, Babar was an associate of the ringleader of the deadly July 7, 2005, transit attack in London, the fertilizer bomb plotters and a group who cased Britain’s luxury hotels and targets on Wall Street, law enforcement officials said.Babar pleaded guilty in the United States in 2004 to smuggling money and military supplies to a senior al Qaeda figure and awaits sentencing.

The slightly built Yankees fan from Queens described how he mingled with radicals from the fall of 2001, when he quit a job as a computer programmer and left New York for Lahore — saying he was radicalized by the U.S.-led invasion of Afghanistan.

Babar’s house and office in Lahore became a magnet for young militants — an outpost of Britain’s al-Muhajiroun militant Islamic group that was banned by British authorities after members praised the September 11 attacks.

His home was also a virtual armory: A kitchen spice rack was packed with jars of chemicals, and aluminum powder and fertilizer for making bombs were stuffed in a bedroom cupboard.

The backyard was a makeshift firing range, Babar testified. Buried close by was a cache of AK-47 rifles, grenades and ammunition.

I don’t wanna come off all hawkish or anything, but based on the above information, it seems to me the administration would be fully justified — as much as ever, anway — to commence bombing the Bronx.

Suffering At Shea : Fish Pounding Park

Posted in Baseball at 7:09 pm by

At the risk of stating the incredibly obvious, even Jose Lima thinks Chan Ho Park was ill-qualified to get the start Monday night.

El Duqe and The ‘Stache were each placed on the 15 Day DL earlier today, while Braves closer Bob Wickman went on the disabled list with an upper back injury. Wickman blew a pair of saves against the Rockies over the weekend, then suffered the indignity of being mistaken for Todd Jones at a nearby bathhouse. Unless that wasn’t actually Wickman, either (it was kind of steamy, sorry).

Cincinnati have announced plans to retire Davey Concepcion’s no. 13 during a July 28 ceremony. The club have neither confirmed, nor denied that Death Wish will provide the evening’s pregame entertainment by covering Das Damen’s ‘Triskaidekaphobia’ in its entiriety.

Marion: Fourth Best Defender, Hands Down

Posted in Basketball at 7:04 pm by

You may remember the Suns’ Shawn Marion — he of the inferiority complex — saying after a win over Dallas that he was “Defensive Player of the Year, hands down.”

Well, not only did the Matrix finish fourth in that category, he didn’t even make All-Defensive team … or second team. But here’s the real burner: Teammate Raja Bell made first team. That’s gotta sting.

Says Marion in The Arizona Republic:

“It’s all right,” Marion said. “I’m just going to keep doing what I do.”

Which means more grousing about being underappreciated. Wouldn’t be surprised for the annual Marion trade rumors to crop up, and possibly even Matrix requesting a deal. Like Joe Johnson before him, Marion wants to be The Man. Would Bryan Colangelo try to reunite with him in Toronto? Or maybe the Grizzlies, if they go after Suns assistant Marc Iavaroni for their head coaching job?

Marchman : Yanks’ Crappy April Par For The Course

Posted in Baseball at 6:38 pm by

George Steinbrenner offered moderate support for Brian Cashman and Joe Torre today, but with all due respect to the Boss (and Howard Rubenstein), the owner could’ve done worse than merely forward today’s New York Sun column by Tim Marchman (thanks to Sam Frank for the link).

There are, perhaps, more ridiculous spectacles to be found in New York than the annual orgy of fretting that takes place among Yankees fans in late April. Full to the brim with cultists, angst-ridden teenagers, the idle rich, fashion designers, bad novelists, drug enthusiasts, diplomats, and actors, among others, the city offers up many preposterous scenes. Few, though, can compete with the frenzy that overtakes rational, educated people at this time of year, faced with standings offering proof that the Yankees have not managed to win their customary 95 games by the end of the baseball season’s first month.

‘m highly impressed overall by the way the Yankees have played lately. They lost four of their top six starters to fluke injuries, and a fifth opened the season in a technical funk so bad he had to be yanked from the rotation. Their left fielder, their center fielder, and their catcher, all among the most durable players in baseball, have all been injured. Given all that, a 9“14 record isn’t something of which they should be ashamed, it’s something of which they should be proud. And when you consider that the Yankees have actually outscored their opponents (and, in fact, scored more runs than any team in baseball), meaning that their record doesn’t even really reflect how well this crippled team has played, any tendency toward hysteria is shown to be all the more outlandish.

I don’t think Torre should have come into this season as the Yankees’ manager, for a variety of reasons, but I defy anyone to explain what new information would make firing the man a sensible reaction to a bad, injury-riddled start to the season. The only real points against him are that Bobby Abreu has apparently read the Roberto Alomar handbook on bunting in RBI situations (not that big a deal, really), and that he’s overworking the bullpen. There isn’t, of course, a manager who’s ever lived who wouldn’t do so with seven of his top eight starters either hurt or ineffective, and Torre has been overworking the bullpen for years without anyone caring. But this is the sort of point that people latch onto when they want to see something ” anything! ” done, and when they want someone to blame.

Chicago Station Limits Salisbury Airtime…

Posted in Gridiron, Sports Radio at 6:28 pm by

…despite the fact you can’t see his penis on the radio.  From ESPN 1000 in Chicago :

Sean Salisbury, co-host of Salisbury & Rosenbloom, which previously aired in the morning slot, will increase his national ESPN Radio network responsibilities, continue his ESPN TV NFL analysis, and play a role in ESPN 1000′s pre-game Bears coverage and contribute to various shows during the season. In the immediate future, he will take time off from local radio to tend to family matters.

Senior VP, ESPN Radio Traug Keller said, ‘Sean is already a valuable contributor on the ESPN Radio network, and now his increased national role will help us further satisfy our listeners across the country who are constantly clamoring for all things football.’

Writes Hot Shit College Student, supplier of the above item, “Salisbury and Rosenbloom was probably the most fucked radio I’ve ever heard. I welcome the breezy homerism offered by Tom Waddle and former Mariotti stooge, Marc Silverman. It beats Colin Cowherd.”


Vescey : The Mavs Are Decomposing

Posted in Basketball at 6:17 pm by

Though the day’s big hoops story is unquestionably the defending champs’ first round exit at the hands of Da Bulls, we’ll go back in time about 24 hours, in which the New York Post’s Peter Vescey previews Game 4 of the Mavs/Warriors series with some harsh words about Friday’s debacle, to wit, “never has a team that’s won so many games (67) surrendered so unconditionally (Game 3) and decomposed so rapidly from jump street.”

The Warriors should be brought up on charges of identity theft; the Mavs’ minds are messed up, cuz. Heads are hanging. Eyes are glazed. Feet are frozen. Focus is adrift. They’re folding to pressure on the free-throw line long before the shots become must makes. Nobody scored a single point Friday that remotely mattered, that’s how quickly Dallas was out of it.

Meanwhile, the Warriors are running a full-court layup line. Mav-wrecks are allowing opponents to beat them down court and off the dribble. Effortlessly! Off half-court sets, no less! How can you let your man blow by continually when you know your “Help!” isn’t quick enough to react!?

Where’s the Mavs’ energy? Where’s the rage? Where’s the pride? Where’s the basketball HiQ? They say they hate losing. Prove it! The most anger they showed Friday was directed at the refs.

Yesterday, Avery Johnson had his players studying film early in the a.m. before going to practice for three hours. You didn’t have to be there to know the No. 1 topic of conversation was transition defense. In order to regain their confidence and take control of the series (yes, one lousy win in Oakland might be enough to do it) it’s imperative for the Mavs to retard the pace today and slice the Warriors’ fast-break points roughly in half from an indefensible 40 in Game 3.

How is that done? Open up the middle and honor spacing. Attack off pick-and-rolls and pull up for simple springers instead of risking charges. Set picks to free scorers and get to the welfare line like in Game 2.

The Boston Globe’s Shira Springer correctly points out that setting Sebastian Telfair’s contract on fire will not absolve the Celtics of their obligations towards the point guard…but threatening to do so effectively killed Telfair’s already low-value on the open market.

Following the arrest and subsequent remarks from Celtics co-owner Wyc Grousbeck that Telfair had played his last game in a Boston uniform, a league source said the one-for-one deals had evaporated, leaving executive director of basketball operations Danny Ainge with little bargaining leverage.

The best deals always dry up when players and teams reach a point of no return. Just ask the 76ers, who had Allen Iverson then Chris Webber dangling, or the Pacers, who knew Ron Artest needed a new home long before he found one.

Ainge basically has two viable options: pursue a multi-player package deal or waive Telfair. The good news for Danny Ainge is that several teams expressed interest in Telfair after Grousbeck’s comments sparked false reports that the point guard had been released.

If you’re thinking the Celtics could nullify Telfair’s contract, don’t bank on it. Historically, nullifying a contract is never easy and never absolves a team entirely from financial obligation. The Vin Baker saga is well-known to fans in these parts, but don’t forget about the Raptors and Nate Huffman or the Warriors and Latrell Sprewell.

Australia Claims The World Cup. Or So We’re Told

Posted in Cricket at 5:52 pm by

(Adam Gilchrist, right, before the sun went down)

Did you have trouble seeing the conclusion of the 2007 ICC Cricket World Cup? You’re not alone. Though somewhat redeemed by Adam Gilchrist’s stunning 149 off 104 balls, Australia’s 53 run victory over Sri Lanka Saturday under the Duckworth-Lewis Method is unlikely to be remembered fondly by neutrals. From the Times Online :

The final saw a chaotic finish in which Australia were forced to bowl the final three overs in near darkness. The teams had left the field for bad light and umpires wrongly ruled that if they did not return they would have to play out the remainder the following morning.

Jeff Crowe, the World Cup final referee, is hoping the “human error” which turned the end of the showpiece match into a farce does not amount to a resignation issue for him. Crowe admitted last night that the responsibility lay with him for the confusion which led to Australia beating Sri Lanka and celebrating their third successive Cup crown twice over.

Crowe reported that the voices of both on-field umpires Steve Bucknor and Aleem Dar – as well as third official Rudi Koertzen and even the fourth, Billy Bowden – were heard before players from both teams were mistakenly informed that if they did not return from a break for bad light to play three remaining overs they would have to resume on the reserve day instead. Because 20 overs of the second innings had already been completed, the match was over – with no need or provision for using the second day.

With near darkness fast gathering, Sri Lanka – who eventually lost by 53 runs on the Duckworth-Lewis system – had already accepted there was no longer any way they could win. Captains Ricky Ponting and Mahela Jayawardene therefore agreed to bowl only slow bowlers and pat back the ball, before Australia were declared winners for a second and final time.

After a presentation ceremony in which a full-house crowd booed match and ICC officials for their perceived part in such an unsatisfactory ending, Crowe did not seek to explain away his and his colleagues’ errors. “I’m very embarrassed for the playing control team, it’s our mistake,” he said. “These circumstances are very difficult, and it is a bit of a crisis.

“We hope we can learn from this mistake and get it right. They are quite confusing issues to get right, but what we must make sure we do is look at the black print which says the game is over when the 20 overs have been completed. We got our minds clouded over that whole simple issue. It was some voices reiterating when the end of the match was, that tomorrow was the way forward – and that was incorrect.”

John Maine – The Greatest Human Alive Or Merely The NL’s Most Surprising Success Story?

Posted in Baseball at 4:29 pm by

Hey, why not both? Acquired for the mere price of Mr. Anna Benson, Mets starter John Maine ran his record to 4-0 today, scattering 3 hits and striking out 8 over 7 IP in a 1-0 defeat of Washington. New York’s margin of victory was provided by a solo Carlos Beltran HR off luckless Nats starter Jason Bergmann.

Getting Paid To Watch’s
Bob Sikes, a Mets clubhouse fixture himself during the 1980′s in his role as assistant trainer, assures us “its not fair to assume members of the great Mets teams of the 80™s were involved” with alleged steroid supplier Kirk Radomski.

In 1985, Kirk would have been about 15 and wasn™t one of the kids who was around at spring training then, but I believe was later full-time as the decade progressed.

He was never a member of official staff at any level. He wasn™t a trainer, a strength coach or probably recognized as an equipment mannager. He probably was paid an hourly wage as an attendant and maybe some from Charlie Samuals out of his tips.

I cannot speak with any degree of certainty beyond the 1991 season as I was dismissed in October of that year after the season. What I am certain of sharing though is a few things. During my time there from 1985 through the end on the 1991 season Radomski had nothing at all to do with providing niether training nor care for any New York Mets player or assisted any member of the Mets medical staff in any manner of any real consequence.

On slightly more ‘fess-up tip, if you’re looking for confirmation The Drugs Don’t Work, look no further than the Flushing tenure of Brian McRae. Though he didn’t take any, of course. Turk Wendell told ESPN The Magazine, “On the Mets, you were definetly an outcast if you didn’t take amphetamines.” Or if your name was Gregg Jefferies.

New England Acquires Moss…

Posted in Gridiron at 3:07 pm by

…and if this doesn’t mean that Pat Patriot needs a new look, at the very least it should guarantee an even lower level of rhetoric on WEEI once the baseball season ends.  From the Boston Globe’s Mike Reiss.

In a stunning move, the Patriots traded a fourth-round draft pick to the Raiders for controversial wide receiver Randy Moss (above) today.

Trade discussions picked up after the first day of the NFL draft and continued into this morning. The Patriots have tentatively scheduled a conference call with Moss for later today.

The fourth-round pick traded to the Raiders had been acquired on Saturday from the 49ers. The Patriots traded their 2007 first-round pick (28th overall) to the 49ers for a 2008 first-round pick and 2007 fourth-round pick (110th).

Moss is currently in New England undergoing a physical. He has agreed to restructure and/or extend his contract to consummate the deal. He is due base salaries of $9.25 million in 2007 and $11.25 million in 2008.

The 6-foot-4, 210-pound Moss enters his 10th NFL season after having played for the Vikings (1998-2004) and Raiders (2005-2006). He had a career-low 42 catches for 553 yards and three touchdowns last season as the Raiders struggled to a 2-14 record, and is said to be motivated to join a winning program.

The acquisition of Moss continues the team’s offseason makeover at the position. The Patriots traded for Wes Welker and signed Donte’ Stallworth and Kelley Washington in free agency.

Cards’ Hancock, Dead At 29

Posted in Baseball at 1:32 pm by

From the St. Louis Post-Dispatch’s Bill Bryan.

Cardinals relief pitcher Josh Hancock was killed early Sunday in an accident on Highway 40 (Interstate 64), just east of Compton Avenue, authorities said.

Hancock’s Ford Explorer slammed into the rear of a tow truck that was parked in the far left westbound lane shortly after 12:30 a.m. The tow truck driver, who was seated in the vehicle at the time, was unhurt.

He told police that his emergency lights were on, and that he honked his horn when he saw the Explorer approaching in his rear view mirror, but that the Explorer didn’t slow down or swerve to avoid the collision.

At the time of the accident, the tow truck driver was assisting a motorist from an earlier accident.

Hancock, 29, was pronounced dead at the scene. The medical examiner’s office said Sunday morning that an autopsy had been scheduled.

The Cardinals released a statement confirming Hancock’s death, and will make another statement at 3 p.m. at Busch Stadium.

Their home game game tonight against the Chicago Cubs has been called off and will be played later this season. A new date has not been set.


Scarier Than Troy McClure : The Sick Sexual Practices Of Chris Duncan

Posted in Baseball at 5:32 pm by

Cubs 8, Cardinals 1

Bad enough for the Cards that the roof caved in on Adam Wainright in the Cubs’ 7 run 5th inning today. Discouraging enough for St. Louis that Carlos Zambrano (1 earned run, 7 hits, no walks, 7 IP) had his most solid outing of the season earlier today. But if Chris Duncan insists on fucking electrical sockets in the walls of Nuevo Busch, surely a national TV audience shouldn’t have to witness it?

Sharp : Millen’s A Moron

Posted in Gridiron at 5:22 pm by

With Detroit needing to fill more holes than one wide receiver — even a world class talent like Calvin Johnson —- can possibly compensate for — the Free Press’ Drew Sharp scoffs at Lions GM Matt Millen not dealing the 2nd overall pick, asking is it any wonder that they remain annual participants in the NFL draft™s top 10?”

There™s nothing wrong with standing firm with the hope of getting maximum value for the second pick overall, but you can™t be stubborn enough to walk away from what might be a very good offer simply because you™re demanding a proposal that blows your socks off.

The Lions blew it again.

œYou can scoff at it if you like, Millen told reporters about his decision to keep Johnson.

Perhaps those words were another smokescreen, and if you™re a Lions sap, you had better hope so, because despite his extraordinarily high potential, Johnson is most valuable to the Lions for the extra early-round draft picks “ and extra bodies “ he potentially brings.

He™s got freakish athleticism and was generally considered the highest rated talent in the draft. But he™s still a wide receiver.

This should have been Millen-proof.

The word there was œshould.

Deadspin Colleagues In Rapture Over Sliding Quinn

Posted in Gridiron at 1:43 pm by

As QB Brady Quinn hasn’t been selected within the first 15 overall picks (Cleveland throwing a slight, Charlie Frye-loving curve with the choice of Wisconsin LT Joe Thomas, above, at no. 3), at least one panel of esteemed observers seems a little too pleased with the Notre Dame product’s excessive face time. From Gawker.com :

Millions of Americans are crowding around the TV or at least occasionally glancing up from their mugs at the bar to check out the NFL Draft today. Although this seven-round yawnfest mostly features at best reluctant teams picking talent that seems the least likely to implode under animal-abuse charges, colossal fan expectations, and the cold-hearted business features of the NFL, there’s occasionally reason to watch. Take, for instance, hunky first rounder Brady Quinn of Notre Dame, who has sports fans licking the hot sauce and blue cheese from their chops every time he drops another position.

According to sources who actually have cable, ESPN’s cameras are zoning in on the uncomfortable Quinn, who is doing such things as adjusting his tie, loosening his tie, and playing with his tie in nervous anticipation. The thick/pretty piece of manmeat is jittering like an Eskimo without a parka, and the colossal plummet is schadenfreudelicious.

RB Marshawn Lynch (Cal), is displayed above, in cliptastic form.  Buffalo selected Lynch at no. 12 in the first round — O.J. Simpson, while probably not unavailable for comment, probably wasn’t consulted, either.

King : Torre’s On Thin Ice

Posted in Baseball at 11:09 am by

I don’t often find myself feeling sympathy for Yankee fans, but when the New York Post follows Jon Heyman’s claim that James Dolan is keen to purchase the ballclub with the above front cover, even an avowed Highlander Hater becomes queasy. And if we’re to believe the Post’s George King, Andy Pettitte and Mariano Rivera being knocked around by the Red Sox last night could well portend the end of Joe Torre’s long tenure in the Bronx.

Yesterday, the word out of Tampa was that Steinbrenner “was very displeased” about the way his high-priced stable of talent is underachieving and was thinking about a change.

Could Torre, who is in the final year of his contract, really be fired before April is finished? Is Torre the reason the starting rotation has melted in the first month and put an alarming workload on the bullpen? Is it Torre’s fault the lineup, so potent through 19 games, has gone 20 innings without an extra-base hit?

If Steinbrenner and the voices he is listening to believe the answers are “yes,” and if the Yankees get swept this weekend by the Red Sox, it’s not out of the realm of the possibility that The Boss could make a change.

Bench coach Don Mattingly and former Yankees catcher Joe Girardi are the names you hear when potential replacements for Torre are mentioned. Working in Girardi’s favor is that he has a year of managing experience. Mattingly was moved from hitting coach to bench coach to be groomed as Torre’s successor.

They’re ‘Tarded In Toledo : Choo Booed Over VT Massacre

Posted in Baseball, Racism Corner at 10:38 am by

From the Cleveland Plain-Dealer’s Paul Hoynes (link swiped from Baseball Think Factory)

Outfielder Shin-Soo Choo, promoted to the big leagues Monday by the Indians, has heard boos before.Last week, the boos took on a disturbing tone. When Class AAA Buffalo, the Indians’ top farm club, played in Toledo, fans apparently associated him with Seung-Hui Cho, the Virginia Tech senior who killed 32 of his schoolmates before killing himself April 16.

“Some fans said bad things,” said Choo before Monday’s game. “It’s pretty close to my name. My name is spelled Choo, and his name is Cho.”

When asked what the fans were saying, Choo wouldn’t say. “It upset me when a couple of fans talked like that,” he said.Choo and Cho are from South Korea.

Smart Aleck : Russell’s Gonna Be A Bust

Posted in Gridiron at 10:18 am by

As reports are issued, then refuted that Oakland has opted to selected LSU QB Jamarcus Russell with the no. 1 overall pick in today’s NFL Draft, at least one loyal Brady Quinn supporter insists that Russell is “a fraud” and “the next Ryan Leaf.” Have fun picking apart the following, authored by 411mania’s Ian Smart.

Six months ago if I had told you that the Raiders were going to take Russell, you would disregard everything else I wrote. No one thought Russell should go in the first round when the season began, or even half way through the season. Russell shot up the draft boards after the Sugar Bowl when LSU went head-to-head with Notre Dame and won.

This raises the question of why was Russell not considered a first round talent in October or November? The answer is that he wasn’t worthy of such lofty status, and he still isn’t. Russell finished the season throwing 28 touchdowns and 8 interceptions, rendering him less productive than Quinn in either of his last two seasons. Quinn threw 37 touchdowns and 7 interceptions as a Senior and 32 Touchdowns and 7 interceptions as a Junior.

Russell’s big selling point is not his stats, it is his physical attributes. By now everyone knows that Russell has a cannon of an arm, maybe the best that anyone has ever seen, but how useful is his cannon? How much is just overkill? Apparently Russell can throw inhuman lengths on his knees and posterior, and I will be the first to say that those are impressive feats of strength, but when are they utilized in a game?

If Russell is on his knees, chances are he is being sacked and can therefore not throw, but let’s say he slips and he is on his butt, do you want him to attempt to hit a receiver forty yards down the field? One that he cannot see because of the linemen in the way. Even if you just want to take these accomplishments as a sign of his strength, and not a practical tool, at a certain point arm strength is irrelevant. Drew Brees, Tom Brady, Carson Palmer and Marc Bulger cannot throw as far of Russell, but they are Pro Bowl Quarterbacks. Brady Quinn can throw the ball 70-80 yards from his feet “ the only time you should throw a ball that far- so arm strength is irrelevant in the comparison between the two Quarterbacks. There is no throw that Russell can make that Quinn cannot. Russell’s ability to throw a ball threw a brick wall is useless in every facet of the game; it just makes for a good publicity stunt.

With about 90 minutes to go before the Draft begins, we might as congratulate the Lions in advance. Sooner or later, the whole picking a wide-receiver-every-year thing had to pay off, and it probably will this time.

After some disturbing chit chat (is there any other kind) between Dan Patrick and Peter King yesterday that involved the words “titanium plate”, there’s further scuttlebutt (courtesy of the Fanhouse’s Ryan Wilson) that OU RB Adrian Peterson might not play in 2007.

The Dallas Morning News’ Rick Gosselin tips the Cowboys to select Texas CB Aaron Ross with the 22nd overall pick. More importantly, Joe Benigno-Gazingo and Evan Roberts are overcome with emotion in reporting the Burger King has arrived at Radio City Music Hall.


CSTB’s Recent Lack Of NFL Coverage Explained

Posted in Gridiron at 7:50 pm by

America’s Most Popular Sport has received scant coverage of late around these parts, and the reasons could be one or more of the following :

a) I’m dreading a Saturday morning in which the phrase “best athlete available” is uttered nearly 200 times.

b) I’m dreading a Saturday morning in which virtually every columnist and blogger is compelled to refer to Mel Kiper Jr.’s hair (ok, I’m in). Without displaying their own quiff, of course.

c) my requests for press credentials at the Draft were shot down. Who knew Stalking The Schwab would be so tough?  Other than Jeff Jensen, I mean.

d)  I’ve been busy making hotel and flight reservations for Super Bowl 50, taking place at Nuevo Wembley.

d) it’s hard to do anything properly after seeing this :

Inhuman Amusements At $2.2. Million A Year : Scott Pollard’s Crime Against Music

Posted in Basketball at 7:21 pm by

File this under Not Safe For People Who Can Hear. (link swiped from True Hoop)

The quote of the week award goes to the Warriors’ Stephen Jackson, who says of the Chuckster comparing him to Terrell Owens, “I don’t get in conflicts with people that don’t have championship rings. I’ve got one.”  Wow. Who knew the car that ran Jackson down outside Club Rio was being driven by Red Auerbach?

With more than a full quarter to go in the Swamp, Jason Kidd already has a triple double, Vince Carter is putting on a clinic (the scoring at will kind, not the sort no one wants to go to), and the Nets lead the Raptors, 75-64.

Ex-Mets Batboy Prepares To Sing

Posted in Baseball, The Law at 7:02 pm by

From the AP and SI.com :

A former New York Mets clubhouse employee pleaded guilty Friday to distributing steroids to major league players, and is cooperating with baseball’s steroids investigation.

Kirk Radomski, 37, admitted providing anabolic steroids, human growth hormone, Clenbuterol, amphetamines and other drugs to “dozens of current and former Major League Baseball players, and associates, on teams throughout Major League Baseball,” San Francisco U.S. Attorney Scott Schools said in a statement.

Radomski, who worked for the Mets from 1985-95, dealt human growth hormone, deca-durabolin and testosterone, among other drugs, the San Jose Mercury News reported, citing a search warrant affidavit. The warrant had some information blacked out, including what appeared to be players’ names.

According to that warrant, Radomski became a major source of drugs for baseball players after federal investigators shut down Bay Area Laboratory Co-Operative in Burlingame.

The case is being handled by the same federal investigators who netted guilty pleas from BALCO founder Victor Conte and Barry Bonds’ personal trainer, Greg Anderson, among others.

As part of the plea deal, the Washington Post reported Radomski agreed to testify before any grand jury proceeding as requested by the government and participate in undercover activities.

The affidavit listed 23 checks worth more than $30,000 that federal investigators alleged were deposited by individuals associated with MLB into Radomski’s bank account between May 2003 and March 2005, the Post reported.

And SI.com reported cell phone numbers belonging to current and former MLB players already have been identified.

Howard Johnson, a Mets infielder in the 1980s and currently the team’s first-base coach, remembered Radomski.

“He was a clubhouse kid, one of several, one of the kids that were there,” Johnson said before the Mets played at Washington on Friday night.

Ramdowski, presumably not a Cam’ron fan,  was certainly a fixture in Flushing for a long era and I for one am bracing myself for the inevitable day in which a small boy on the courthouse steps is heard to cry, “say it ain’t so, Bill Pecota, say it ain’t so!”

The 100% clean 2007 Mets are currently trailing the Nationals, 3-2, in the top of the 4th at RFK, courtest of a 3-run blast by Austin Kearns off Oliver Perez in the first inning.  Shawn Green has a pair of hits, raising his average to .367, and further puncturing the hopes of dreams of Lastings Milledge, who was placed on the DL today after straining a ligament in his right foot at Triple-A New Orleans.

Kevin Youklis connected for a 2-run HR off Andy Pettitte in the 3rd inning tonight in the Bronx, spotting Daisuke Matzusaka and the Red Sox a 2-0 advantage. Such grim news for Yankee fans, however, pales in comparison to an item by Jon Heyman that raises the spectre of The Straight Shot’s J.D. purchasing the Bombers.

Your Wednesday Night Is All Figured Out

Posted in General, Internal Affairs, Rock Und Roll at 4:38 pm by

The Black + a northeastern interloper fond of songs about kitty kats and flying kites Idi Amin. It’s all going down at the Scoot Inn, 1308 E. 4th St., Austin, TX, next Wednesday, May 2 at 10pm. It’s free until 2am, at which point there’s no amount of money that will help you out.

Put A Sock In It : Schilling Can’t Leave Well Enough Alone

Posted in Baseball, Blogged Down, Sports TV at 2:27 pm by

It’s not nearly enough for Curt Schilling that Gary Thorne (“an awesome hockey announcer”) has been exposed as less than credible, nor does no. 38 take much satisfaction in his October ’04 heroics being recounted in the papers over and over again. Instead, while offering a one million dollar donation to charity(!) if anyone can prove his bloody sock wasn’t 4REAL, Boston’s foremost Everquest enthusiast / Republican Schill uses his 38 Pitches blog to tar much of the print and broadcast media with the same (bloody) brush.

Take Gary Thorne, John, Jack Joe or whatever his first name is, Heyman, Karen Vescey, Woody Paige, CHB, Jay Marriotti, Bill Plaschke, and a host of other people that litter the media landscape, and put them all on an island somewhere.Does anyone stop reading their newspapers? Watching the shows they appear on? The answer to that is no. Instead of using the forums they participate in to do something truly different, change lives, inspire people, you have an entire subset of media whose sole purpose in life is to actually be the news, instead of report it. They have little to no talent at what they do and other than a mastery of the English language their skill sets are non-existent.

Watching Woody Paige or the plastered made up face of Jay Marriotti spew absolutely nothing of merit on sports, day after day, makes it easy to understand how Gary Thorne could say something as stupid, ignorant, and uninformed as he did the other night.

If you haven™t figured it out by now, working in the media is a pretty nice gig. Barring outright plagiarism or committing a crime, you don™t have to be accountable if you don™t want to. You can say what you want when you want and you don™t really have to answer to anyone. You can always tell the bigger culprits by the fact you never see their faces in the clubhouse. Most of them are afraid to show themselves to the subjects they rail on everyday.

So Gary Thorne says that Doug told him the blood was fake. Which even when he™s called out he can™t admit he lied. Doug never told Gary Thorne anything. Gary Thorne overheard something and then misreported what he overheard. Not only did he misreport it, he misinterpreted what he misreported.

Without dismissing Schilling’s right to take umbrage at Thorne’s comments, this particular salvo at Masarroti, Page, Shaugnessey and Plaschke is pretty unsophisticated, even by Curt’s standards. Perhaps the quartet aren’t nearly as committed to “reporting the news” as Curt would like because they paid to express their opinions rather than merely provide the game story. Whether or not any of the above have much to offer in that regard, is another subject, but I think Schilling is missing the point here. If Thorne’s accusations were without evidence, he’s up shit creek and deservedly so (though again, this wouldn’t be the first time someone challenged Doug Mirabelli’s account of something). But that has little, if anything to do with print journalists who routinely mock Schilling’s egomania.

Mushnick On A Steamy Case Of Mistaken ID

Posted in Dead Authors, Sports Journalism, Sports Radio at 12:38 pm by

There are so many things Phil Mushnick and I have in common. Beards. Devotion to our families. A deep appreciation for the Billy Joel canon. Judaism. But perhaps least surprising is that we’re each fans of David J. Halberstam’s “Sports On New York Radio : A Play By Play History”, a tome Phil calls “among the most relied upon books in my library.”

As you might imagine, the book’s author, a former Miami Heat broadcaster, probably fielded no shortage of calls this week upon the passing of Pulitzer winner David Halberstam (amazingly enough, writes Mushnick, a 5th cousin, as both men would later learn). And as Phil transcibes in Friday’s Post, such a mix-up could’ve once yielded some sexy results.

“Not that there should have ever been any confusion, not before, not now. For one thing, David was 73. I’m 55. And while we both had written sports books, I only wrote one.

“And he won a Pulitzer Prize. If I’d been the David Halberstam to win a Pulitzer, I’d have years ago made the distinction between the two of us very clear to everyone.

“I hate to have to think of David’s death in terms of what it means to me, about putting an end to a lot of confusion about our shared names. But, sadly, this should be the end of it.”

It was interesting while it lasted. Even the late David Halberstam, at dinner 18 months ago, told me that he’d occasionally be confused with David, the other.

There was always enough in the mix to mistake David Halberstam for David Halberstam.

David The Other, after all, is now the Executive VP of Westwood Radio Sports. Before that he was the radio voice of the Miami Heat, and before that the radio voice of St. John’s basketball, and before that the analyst on CUNY basketball radiocasts (Myron Rushetzky, the Post’s longtime City Desk traffic controller, was Halberstam’s stat man).

During the 1984-85 basketball season, Larry King’s USA Today column – those columns are still legendary for their colossally comical mistakes – noted that David Halberstam, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author, was spending the winter calling St. John’s basketball games on WCBS radio.

And there was that night in 1977, when both Halberstams were single, and the phone rang in Halberstam The Other’s Manhattan apartment. “The woman’s voice on the other end was dreamy, the kind heard in a movie – ‘David, I just arrived in town, and I don’t have your address, and I so much want to see you.’

“That was a tough thing to do, telling her that I think she has the wrong David Halberstam.”

Attn : Philly Phans Who Enjoy Wallowing In Their Own Misery

Posted in Baseball at 12:03 pm by

…after yesterday’s 4-2 loss to the Nats, your tragic number stands at 32. (link courtesy Scott Comeau).

The Sultan Of Surly Has Fallen Out Of Favor With Angry, Drunk Georgians

Posted in Baseball, The Law at 11:14 am by

From The Smoking Gun :

While there is never an excuse for getting drunk and breaking into a neighbor’s home, this Georgia arrestee did have a point last week with his drunken ramblings about Barry Bonds. William Smith, 21, allegedly forced his way into a Statesboro home and verbally threatened the elderly couple living there. The intoxicated Smith, who we’re guessing is a Hank Aaron/Atlanta Braves fan, was shouting, “Barry Bonds did not deserve to be the home run king” when police found him in the kitchen of a home at 7 Greenwood Lane, according to an April 18 Statesboro Police Department report. Smith lives at 17 Greenwood Lane, so perhaps he thought pensioners Shafik and Nilofer Hashmi had broken into his house. Smith, a Georgia Southern University student, was booked into the Bulloch County jail and was charged with a felony burglary count.

In other Bonds musings, The Globe’s David Lefort considers the possibility of Barry breaking Hank Aaron’s home run mark when the Giants visit Fenway Park in mid June. Given the Sultan’s past statements about the city of Boston, this should no doubt inspire all sorts of deep, thoughtful discussion on WEEI.