Agassi : Meth Turned Me Into Felix Unger

Posted in Tennis at 8:36 pm by

I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to watch “Advantage Agassi” the same way ever again. The Times published excerpts earlier today from Andre Agassi’s soon-to-be-published autobiography, Open, including detailed revelations about the 1992 Wimbledon champion’s experiences with crystal meth.

In his book, Agassi recounts sitting at home with his assistant, referred to only as Slim, and being introduced to the drug. œSlim is stressed too … He says, You want to get high with me? On what? Gack. What the hell™s gack? Crystal meth. Why do they call it gack? Because that™s the sound you make when you™re high … Make you feel like Superman, dude.

œAs if they™re coming out of someone else™s mouth, I hear these words: You know what? F*** it. Yeah. Let™s get high.

œSlim dumps a small pile of powder on the coffee table. He cuts it, snorts it. He cuts it again. I snort some. I ease back on the couch and consider the Rubicon I™ve just crossed.

œThere is a moment of regret, followed by vast sadness. Then comes a tidal wave of euphoria that sweeps away every negative thought in my head. I™ve never felt so alive, so hopeful ” and I™ve never felt such energy.

œI™m seized by a desperate desire to clean. I go tearing around my house, cleaning it from top to bottom. I dust the furniture. I scour the tub. I make the beds.

Fed Ex Field- When You Absolutely, Positively Have To Check Your Civil Liberties At The Door

Posted in Gridiron at 5:39 pm by

While there’s no truth to the rumor merely playing The Fall’s “Bingo-Master’s Breakout” in the Fed Ex parking lot would result in a beatdown, Cheap Seats Daily does report Redskins fans attending last night’s unsuccessful debut of Sherman Lewis as Washington’s offensive play-caller were under what our Prince Far I might call “heavy manners”.

Dan Snyder™s jack-booted thugs were out AGAIN? It™s harder to get into a Skins game than an El Al jet?

Dan Snyder™s attempt to kill the message was in full force. I didn™t go to the game, so everything™s anecdotal, but there™s so much.

Tales of scuffles with security over signs and t-shirts blasting the owner abound. The only first-person account I got was from a friend who called me from FedExField just after being searched at the gate like he was boarding an El Al flight.

He asked the frisker, œAre you looking for anti-Snyder paraphernalia?

œAs a matter of fact, I am, the guard told him.

TBL’s Duffy : Thinking Outside Of The Bun Brain

Posted in Blogged Down, Racism Corner, Sports TV, Vroom Vroom at 2:27 pm by

(a delicious taco for Bob Griese, courtesy of Torchy’s)

ESPN suspended college football analyst Bob Griese today for the former Dolphins QB’s ill-advised remarks about Colombian NASCAR driver Juan Pablo Montoya during Saturday’s Minnesota/Ohio State game.  The Big Lead’s Ty Duffy considers ESPN’s actions kowtowing to “PC fascists”, surmising, “political correctness has a place, but that place should be weeding out legitimate racism, rather than hounding an innocuous old man for a minor incident.”

Bob Griese mistook Juan Pablo Montoya for a Mexican. Montoya is Columbian. Griese could be old whitey mistaking all Latin Americans for Mexicans, but it™s far more likely he was just unaware.  He had no time to google.

Assuming Griese was genuine, the taco comment wasn™t offensive.  Mexicans eat tacos.  They are an indigenous part of their cuisine.  They predate the Spanish.  There™s nothing demeaning about eating a taco.

Saying a Mexican is eating a taco is like saying an Englishman drinks tea, an Irishman went out for a pint, or an American was eating a hambuger.  It™s a stereotype.  There certainly are Mexican people who don™t like tacos, but it™s not a gross disparagement of Mexican culture.

Griese™s gag was lame but not scandalous.  It would have appeared in a Dan Shaughnessy column.

Though I have no desire to see Bob Griese lose his job over one isolated incident, it’s pretty hard to understand why said incident should be excused as inoffensive merely because some people weren’t offended.  On the Colombian/Mexican question, ignorance is a poor excuse. The phrase, “they all look alike” comes to mind, and unless Disney believes they really all do look alike, they’re smart to kick Griese to the curb, even if temporarily.

“There’s nothing demeaning about eating a taco.”  Hey, you might think there’s nothing demeaning about eating watermelon, either, and Rick Barry‘s still dealing with the fallout from that one. Anytime you choose to describe someone in terms that specifically target their ethnicity (or what you presume to be their ethnicity) rather than their individual characteristics, they’re reduced to a caricature.

Griese could’ve skewered Montoya for his reputation for arrogance (“he’s probably kissing a mirror somewhere”) or for aggressive driving. Instead, he went after the first thing that popped into his tiny head ; Latino = taco chomping. If that’s the kind of free expression Duffy wishes to defend, perhaps TBL can take up a petition drive to have Steve Lyons replace Steve Phillips on Baseball Tonight next spring.

Bucks Co., PA Police Continue Harrassment Of Creative Types

Posted in Baseball, History's Great Hook-Ups, The Law at 1:48 pm by

Some women will do anything to get a better glimpse of Charlie Manuel in person.  There’s a Chooch Train joke in here somewhere, but I’m not telling it until I’ve had a few drinks later tonight. (h/t Stadium Insider)

NewsCorp : Unfair To Hawaiians (And Crossdressers)

Posted in Are You A Boy Or Are You A Girl?, Baseball, non-sporting journalism at 12:42 pm by

Would it have been so difficult for someone at the Post to properly research what a traditional Hawaiian skirt really looks like? And surely the persons responsible for this front cover of today’s paper are aware once you go down this particular road, there’s no turning back?


Ricky Rubio : Adjusting Nicely To F.C. Barcelona Bàsquet

Posted in Basketball at 10:02 pm by

So where do you think Ricky Rubio would be on the T-Wolves depth chart right about? In the middle of Ramon Sessions and Jonny Flynn, or behind both of them?  Also, note the main beneficiary of Rubio’s passing is Fran Vaszuez, the Magic’s one-that-got-away.

If LJ’s Dad Played For Denzel Washington, He’s Way More Qualified Than Todd Haley

Posted in Gridiron at 7:08 pm by

(above : Stonewall rioters,  1969.  Not shown : Larry Johnson)

It’s been said on more than one occasion that if you’re a prominent public figure, Tweeting is kind of like holding a press conference, except you don’t have to answer questions (or put on pants).  That much is  very clear to Chiefs RB Larry Johnson, who chose Twitter as a venue to bury K.C. head coach Todd Haley hours after a 37-7 loss to the Chargers, a somewhat foolhardy move considering it came after the trade deadline.  From the Star’s Kent Babb :

A message posted on Johnson’s profile, whose username Sunday about 7 p.m. stated: “My father played for the coach from ‘rememeber the titans’. Our coach played golf. My father played for redskins briefley. Our coach. Nuthn.”

Johnson continued the rant, and, in later responses directed toward Johnson’s Twitter followers, contained inflammatory remarks about gays. In a reference to someones profile picture, Johnson called it a “fag pic” and called the person a “Christopher street boy,” a reference to a predominantly gay section in New Yorks Greenwich Village. Johnson’s Twitter profile was taken private and some posts were deleted.

On Monday in the Chiefs locker room, Johnson used another gay slur after saying he wouldn’t speak to reporters.

Johnson, sitting next to second-year running back Jamaal Charles, told reporters that “I’m not talking till Thursday,” his usual day of speaking with reporters.

Then Johnson turned away and whispered.

“Get your faggot ass out of here,” he said.

Johnson’s agent, Peter Schaffer, said Johnson’s tweets were his own but said the running back intended to compliment his father — Larry Johnson Sr. is the defensive line coach at Penn State — and not disparage Haley.

The Mets Blogosphere Cannot Agree On A Lesser Of Two Evils

Posted in Baseball, Blogged Down at 5:09 pm by

(what true Mets fan doesn’t want to see this man rewarded for his years of hard work?

“ICH BIN EIN PHILLIE” declared a sanguine Jason Fry of Faith & Fear In Flushing last week, declaring of the (uncrowned at the time) AL Champion Yankees, “this greater enemy is attended by a howling mob that knows neither reason nor decency nor humility…Twenty-six times has this foe bred a vile plague, one that reduced our nation to lifelessness and blighted all that we hold dear. Though we are not allowed to fight, neither are we required to adjourn in silence. We must lift our voices against tyranny, though we would have chosen most any other champion. We must shout down injustice, though our voices cannot conjure fairness. We must oppose a great evil even if it means supporting a paltry good.” In other words, though it’s distasteful, Fry would advocate Mets fans cheering for Brett Myers to receive a 2nd ring rather than see Hank Steinbrenner and A-Rod doused in champagne.   Tedquarters’ Ted Berg, however, couldn’t disagree more, citing the following Phactors for rooting against The Phillies.  Or more to the point, toning down the hateful rhetoric towards the Highlanders.

1) The Yankees buy their championships

First of all, Mets fans: Just because your glass house is falling apart doesn™t give you the right to throw stones. The Mets had the second-biggest payroll in baseball this year, and even if they didn™t spend like the Yanks did, they still tried pretty hard to buy a championship. They just did a poor job of it.

Second, there™s still nothing illegal about trying to buy a championship. The Yanks bring in a lot of cash, so they spend it on players. Would you prefer the Steinbrenners pocketed the loot? Would that be, in some way, more honorable?

2) My friends are Yankee fans, and they™ll rub it in my face

Will they? Then I have a solid suggestion for you: Get some new friends.

I recognize that there™s an obnoxious sense of entitlement among some Yankee fans, but I™ve actually found it remarkably easy to filter those people out of my life. It turns out, people who are obnoxious and entitled about anything are just not too pleasant to be around. Nowadays, the Yankee fans I do interact with are mostly kind and reasonable people who recognize how lucky they are to root for a team with a $200 million payroll.

Violated : Cultural Appropriation In Honor Of Carlos Ruiz

Posted in Baseball, Free Expression at 12:09 pm by

Given my own rooting interests in the upcoming World Series (ie., I’d like to see it canceled), I have to say I greatly prefer the original version of Kurt Vile‘s video for “Freak Train”.  That said, if the above clip can bring peace to the waring factions behind Chooch’s Chicos and the Chooch -Chooch Train club, who am I to complain?

Introducing The New Publisher & Editor Of Deadspin…

Posted in Blogged Down, Gridiron, Sports Radio, Sports TV at 2:07 am by

….Sean Salisbury. Improbable? I thought so , too. I still do, actually.  But the burden isn’t on the former ESPN analyst / Dallas radio host  to prove he’s never been in the habit of harassing female colleagues with phone-cam snapshots of his schlong, ;  it’ll be down to Gawker Media to prove that Salisbury’s self-portraits weren’t as crudely menacing as his treatment of John Clayton. From the McKinney Courier-Gazzette’s Danny Gallagher :

Sean Salisbury, a Frisco, TX  resident and former National Football League quarterback, filed a petition for a civil defamation lawsuit in a Denton County court against Gawker Media for publishing several false stories on their sports blog Deadspin.com that cost him several jobs, ruined his reputation and made it difficult to find gainful employment.

Salisbury’s attorney, Jeffrey Tillotson of the Dallas law firm Lynn, Tillotson, Pinker & Cox, said in the petition that Deadspin has waged a “long-running smear campaign” against his client since January of 2007.

Harlow,  a member of Salisbury’s counsel,  said the suit singled out Gawker as a defendant because of their “concerted” efforts to single out their client, despite the reporting of others.

“What we hope to prove is that blog sites like Deadspin are accountable,” he said. “They can’t simply attack someone and make a concerted effort to destroy the lives and careers of people without any ramifications. The difference between other news outlets and Deadspin is at least the other news outlets try to get it right. We hope to make a statement that if sites are going to behave like this, there are consequences and they are long overdue for that.”