06.21.10

June 21, 2010 : Tweets From Brighton Beach Sans Mods, Rockers

Posted in twitter twatter at 10:40 pm by

  • Not, however, a tribute to the lousy 90′s LA band Further, whom I once challenged to a knife fight while being interviewed on KXLU #
  • (pic swiped from michaelweiss31)

  • Cyclones tie-dye jerseys were apparently a tribute to Dead spinoff Furthur, who are playing MCU this weekend. #
  • @95Sports AJ’s refusing to mount a professional performance in the state of AZ. It’s a brave stance. Yr turn, Bono in reply to 95Sports #
  • Before you unruly Yankee fans get all pissed with AJ Burnett,understand tonight was really a passive/aggressive protest against SB 1070. #
  • Because he’s got so much to offer? RT @mlbtraderumors: Reds Agree To Terms With Gary Matthews Jr. http://bit.ly/dkIDez #mlb #
  • PSST. He means fornicating! RT @TheSportsHernia Forget A.J. Burnett, will Jeter be meeting Barkley after the game for a Road Beef stampede? #
  • Joe’s more of a Lizzy Mercier Descloux kinda guy RT @wallacematthews:Girardi not Gaga over Lady G:http://espn.go.com/blog/new-york/yankees/ #
  • An actual, albeit brief chant of “KEVIN BURKHARDT” goes up. Trust me, Chris Cotter never heard such cheers. @KBurkhardtSNY #
  • RT @johnrobb77: BLOG! Frank Sidebottom RIPhttp://tinyurl.com/37xnedo (via @plasmatron) #
  • Just say Yo ; Yohan Almonte on in relief for the ‘Lol Wilpons. Brooklyn 5, Aberdeen 2, top 8 #
  • Best part of attending a Cyclones game is the high % of degenerates at the former Keyspan. But enough about Wally, the fans are funny, too. #
  • Aberdeen pitcher just drilled Ryan Sandoval. Hey, not everyone’s a Mazzy Star fan #
  • Worst part about arriving late is that I missed @KBurkhardtSNY performing the Russian national anthem before the game. #
  • Slightly too-casual Monday w/ Wally Backman (no. 6) http://yfrog.com/7gh0grj #
  • Tiny kids at Iron Birds/Cyclones game are struggling w/ “God Bless America”. Could be time for a Wally Meltdown! #
  • Brooklyn 5, Aberdeen 2, top of the 7th. Adam Gaylord at the plate. No reaction from sophisticated Coney Islanders http://yfrog.com/edw82nj #
  • and he’s wearing tie dye RT @NYBD: Gotta love Wally Backman uses every opportunity to teach during the game – very vocal and active #
  • Cyclones 4, Iron Birds 2, last of the 4th. ‘Lil Wilpons are saluting the legacy of Dude Love w/ tie-dye uniforms http://yfrog.com/j0a70vj #
  • if i use NFL team logos to sell my product sans league permission, can i just call it “promoting football?” prob. not http://bit.ly/c37YDG #
  • somebody, please offer @michaelstrahan a basic primer on trademark protection http://bit.ly/c37YDG #
  • i deleted my dad from facebook friends. he handled it pretty well. RT @metsgrrl ppl do throw hissys when you don’t follow/stop follow. #
  • 2nd most obvious reason for untweeting – how many subscription solicitations for Orangebloods.com can anyone read in one week? #
  • @metsgrrl best / most obvious reason for unfollowing – yr sick of reading uninteresting tweets. in reply to metsgrrl #
  • Plain Dealer writer suggests LeBron will stay in Cleveland if he likes zero pressure, low expectations. what? http://alturl.com/5ko4 #
  • and they say network TV’s doomed. RT @Brooklynmutt: Chris “Mad Dog” Russo on Letterman tonight #
  • Read the rest of this entry »

Draft Day Duds : When Jalen Rose Wasn’t So Fab

Posted in Basketball, Fashion at 4:35 pm by

Former Michigan star / longtime NBA fixture Jalen Rose once sagely observed, “ain’t nothing open at 2am in Detroit but hospitals, jails and legs.”  One could add to this, “no decent purchasing decision was ever made at Dapper Dan’s after 2am” (image lifted from Lost Letterman’s “Top Ten Worst Dressed NBA Draft Picks”)

Self-Styled Mets GM Candidate Would Like You To Touch His Foam Finger

Posted in Baseball, Free Expression at 3:39 pm by

Not content with baiting former baseball exec turned blogger Steve Phillips, SNY/NY Baseball Digest columnist Howard Megdal continues his aggressive public campaign to be named the new General Manager of the New York Mets with the above video.  He’s no Dale Peterson, but that’s not for a lack of effort.

Buckley : Manny Should’ve Embraced The Haters

Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism at 3:21 pm by

Dodgers LF Manny Ramirez returned to Fenway Park this past weekend for the first time since being exiled to Los Angeles during the summer of 2008, receiving a somewhat mixed reception from Red Sox fans. Reminding his readers of Manny’s many transgressions (shoving the traveling secretary, general loafing, being the most potent offensive force on a team that won two World Series, etc.), the Boston Herald’s Steve Buckley argues in one sentence, “he was quitting on the fans when he quit on the team”, while also insisting Ramirez should’ve acknowledged the paying customers over the last 3 days.

What remains a mystery is why Ramirez was either unable or unwilling to tune out the booing and allow himself the satisfaction of knowing that, in spite of everything that happened, there are still Sox fans who love him. Had he been able to make that distinction, perhaps he could have stepped out of the batter™s box, removed his helmet, and raised it into the air.

Such a simple time-honored gesture. Old Hoss Radnbourn was doffing his cap to the fans at Messer Field when he was pitching for the 1884 Providence Grays. And the betting here is that if Ramirez could have found a way to remove his helmet, some of the fans who had been booing him would have chosen to let bygones be bygones and given him his props.

That™s what happened in 1993 when Wade Boggs returned to Fenway Park as a member of the Yankees, and in 2006 when Johnny Damon returned, also in Yankee gray.

It would be overstating it to say that Boggs and Damon won over the fans. But they did win over some of the fans, and, anyway, it was the right thing to do for those fans who had been with them all the way.

It would also be a huge understatement to say Ramirez received more grief from local writers and whiner-liners than Boggs or Damon combined, at least when any of the above were actually playing in Boston.

Brazil v. Ivory Coast ; Group G(odawful Acting)

Posted in Football, World Cup 2010 at 12:09 pm by

Only a garbage time Didier Drogba goal spared Côte d’Ivoire from being blanked by Brazil yesterday, but despite the victors’ often clinical exhibition, the main talking points to emerge from this Group G encounter remain the floptastic antics of Kader Keita and a blantant handball on the part of Luis Fabiano.  For the Guardian’s Rob Smyth and Jon Ashdown,the performance of referee Stephane Lannoy is worthy of at least as much dissection.

The Ivorian reacted to Kaká’s raised arm by hitting the turf harder than a Grand National horse going AOT at Bechers Brook, getting the Brazilian sent off. Fabiano handled the ball so much in the buildup to Brazil’s second goal that it should have been followed by a conversion. Lannoy, the referee in Johannesburg, failed to spot the problems with either incident.

Arguably it is Lannoy who should bear the brunt “ the game was out of his control for much of the second half, with some tackles from the African side we might euphemistically describe as ‘feisty’ and more accurately describe as ‘dangerous’ going unpunished. But the Fiver isn’t going to stick it to The Man. Lannoy may have been incompetent, but the players were “ and the Fiver isn’t going to beat about the bush here “ probably not playing entirely in the spirit of the laws.

The managers, though, were happy to let Lannoy have it. “It was totally unjust,” Dunga raged. “He [Kaká] was the one who suffered the foul.” “It’s difficult to cope with Luís Fabiano and even more difficult if he’s allowed to use his hands,” moaned Sven-Goran Eriksson. “They got a goal free, a 2-0 goal which changed everything.” In the end, though, it’s all just hot air. Kaká will miss Brazil’s final group game, but they’re already through anyway, and la Seleção were pipe-and-slippers comfortable even at 1-0. Pathetic play-acting unfortunately seems welded to the game. As is their managers’ consistent failure to condemn it.

06.20.10

June 20, 2010 : FAREWELL TWEETS TO JENRRY

Posted in twitter twatter at 7:12 pm by

  • Not to be outdone by the Yankees, Jay Horowitz just announced Annie Golden is banned from the Mets clubhouse #
  • RT @wallybackman86: To this day, I can’t eat strawberries. Reminds me of wasted talent. That & I usually got a mouth fulla chew. Fuck. #
  • TSA jobs for all! RT @benshpigel: Woman to TSA agent at newark airport: is taking off your shoes compulsory? Agent: No, it’s mandatory. #
  • FIish 2B Dan Uggla : “DON’T HONKY, I’M NOT HORNY . http://bit.ly/9LI6xv (link via @HHReynolds :) #
  • @SallyCrewe‘s gluten-free brownie recipe http://alturl.com/ggb2 #
  • hope you’re right. Otherwise, doubt they can offer enough run support. RT @GeekSoapBox The Mets bat will come. his name is Carlos Beltran. #
  • how about RF? Francoeur’s OPS of .747 ranks 118th in MLB. his OBP of .322. 129th. RT @Brooklynmutt play said bat where? #
  • worst MLB starter I’ve seen in ’10 (including Ollie) RT @dodgerthoughts: Haeger six scoreless IP for Albuquerque today . http://es.pn/aOPhaw #
  • love the Cliff Lee-to-Mets rumors, but Amazins need a bat just as badly http://bit.ly/d0s8kN #
  • RT @AdamRubinESPN: Mejia’s a starter … for B-Mets on Wednesday: http://es.pn/aj7Ebh #mets #
  • 1-2-3 9th for Rivera (duh). still, 7-2 on the road trip was pretty good for the previously travel-phobic @Mets #
  • believe it or not, @KBurkhardtSNY is considered a bigger threat to Yankee Stadium security than @LadyGaga RT @NYBD http://4e494.th8.us #
  • just discovered something AT&T has actually accomplished : they’ve making me sick of Nick Drake #
  • Michael Kay says Angel Pagan “idolizes” Carlos Beltran. Much like all other broadcasters worship Kay. #
  • RT @David_Williams: “Spanking has been part of their development” DMN Aikman Father’s Day hagiography. . http://bit.ly/biXCLU #
  • tempted to mock YES mouthpieces for gushing over John Mayer, but I’ve tweeted about Lady Gaga 5 or 6 times this month #
  • Masshole radio dopes say “happy father’s day, Bill Walton. Now STFU” http://bit.ly/b5CERS #
  • Dave Gionfrido on #NZL v #ITA : “a if tie is like kissing your sis, a tie with the kiwis is like kissing your brother” #heterocentrictweet #
  • happy father’s day to Shawn Kemp, Murry Wilson, Marv Marinovich and Michael Lohan. Keep your chins up, fellas (ok, a bit tougher for Murry) #
  • RT @iluvvideo: I re: Knight & Day trailers. Does anyone else think Tom Cruise is perfectly cast as Peter Faulk in a neo-In-Laws? #
  • please, fewer obscure musical refs, Rob. RT @tannenbaumr Putting Maine in the AL East is like booking Mumford & Sons for a Warped tour. #

Read the rest of this entry »

Miguel Montero, Jose Valverde & Artificially Enhanced Veteran Status

Posted in Baseball at 6:26 pm by

After whiffing on 3 consecutive pitches Friday, Snakes C Miguel Montero was displeased with the K-Rodesque histrionics of Tigers closer Jose Valverde, to which the latter replied, “œtell Montero he™s a freaking rookie and I can do whatever I want to.” From the Arizona Republic’s Nick Piecoro :

“If he wants to do something,” Valverde (above) said, “tell him to come to my locker and let me know.”

œI never liked Montero, he continued. œHe™s a (bleeping) piece of (bleep).

œTell Montero he has two years (in the majors) and I have eight.”

Told of Valverde™s comments, Montero responded, saying he went out on the field before Saturday™s game to see if Valverde wanted to say something. Valverde walked right past him, Montero said.

œIt doesn™t matter if he™s got eight years, Montero said. œI don™t think he™s got eight years because he got sent down seven or eight times. That really doesn™t count. When you get sent down your major league service stops counting. He got called up in ™02 and he got sent down in ™02 and ™03 and ™04 and ™05 and ™06. I guess this year he was a free agent so that let me know he got six years. In four out of six years he™s given up 100 runs a year. He™s only had two good years in his career. So what? He™s still a (bleep) to me.

A stickler for detail, Piecoro points out Valverde began the 2010 season with 6 1/2 years big league service time, while “rookie” Montero is playing in his 4th season in The Show.

The Oregonian’s Canzano : Post Pritchard Blazers-R-Fucked

Posted in Basketball at 6:04 pm by

How tenuous is the job status of Portland GM Kevin Pritchard? Let me put it this way ; even Raymond Domenech thinks he’s doom. The Oregonian’s John Canzano, hardly a stranger to the machinations of Blazers ownership, warns despite consecutive playoff appearances and the presence of Brandon Roy, “nobody of quality” will emerge to fill Pritchard’s shoes. Nothing stopping Isiah Thomas from requesting an interview, then.

The Blazers aren’t going to lure any general manager who currently has a good situation. They won’t be able to entice anyone who could wait around for, say, a year or two and find a better situation. They also won’t be able to easily draw from the vast pool of talent that is managed by LeGarie. So what we have here is an old-fashioned search for miscasts, retreads and the desperate.

Probably explains why the Blazers started the search prematurely and without much tact. Pritchard was quickly alerted by the media and friends in the business that candidates such as Oklahoma City’s Sam Presti were already being asked about their interest.

So how about it, Sammy? Ready to leave Kevin Durant’s side and take a three-year tour of professional hell?

The whisper around the league is that Allen is about to fire an executive that he developed and groomed and replace him with someone desperate enough to take the job.

Heaven help the next guy.

Fantastic Press Releases Of WC2010, Pt. II

Posted in Football, World Cup 2010 at 2:30 pm by

Following Saturday’s dismissal of Nicolas Anelka from France’s national team after calling coach Raymond Domenech “a son of a whore”, the disgruntled striker’s teammates refused to participate in training earlier today. The lamer-than-lame duck Domenech read the following statement, as quoted by The Times Of India :

“All the players in the French squad without exception wish to affirm their opposition to the decision taken by the French Football Federation (FFF) to exclude Nicolas Anelka.

“We regret the incident at half-time of the France vs Mexico match, but we regret even more the divulging of an event which was only the squad’s business and was part and parcel of the life of a top-level team.

“At the squad’s request, the player tried to engage in a dialogue. We regret that his move was wilfully ignored.

“The FFF did not at any point try to protect the squad. It took a decision based solely on facts reported by the press, without consulting the players.

“As a consequence, and to signal their opposition to the attitude adopted by the most senior officials, all of the players decided not to participate in the training session scheduled for today.”

Anelka’s “go fuck yourself” rip was cited earlier today by L’Quipe’s Eric Bielderman during a chat with ESPN’s Bob Ley. “We appreciate your being direct with the quotation,” replied Ley, slightly taken aback by the rare occurrence of a reporter telling ESPN viewers what an athlete actually said.

John Maine, Former New York Met

Posted in Baseball at 11:44 am by

“John Maine may pitch again in the majors this season, but it’s looking more and more as if he won’t be doing it for Jerry Manuel,” writes Newsday’s David Lennon, after the Mets manager responded to Maine’s unimpressive rehab start for Buffalo (IL) by neither promising promotion, nor considering a bullpen assignment.  In the wake of Liargate, has John Maine dropped even further on Manuel’s depth chart than Oliver Perez? Manuel’s comments have all but vaporized Maine’s value, and while New York Baseball Digest’s Mike Silva openly admits as much (“most teams probably believe the Mets will DFA Maine and be done with him”), there’s a handful of trade scenarios he’s happy to float :

The only way I can see the Mets deal Maine is for an expensive player that is underperforming. Remember, a team out of the race could afford to be patient with Maine and see if he could regain his fastball. Also, Maine has another year of arbitration eligibility so he could be an inexpensive option for someone to look at. I brought up Chad Qualls last week because I think they could use someone like him to potentially anchor the eighth inning. Qualls has been terrible in Arizona and making a little over $4 million dollars this year. Swapping him for Maine would actually be a cost savings for the D-Backs.

Another thought was Will Ohman of the Orioles. He is performing well in Baltimore and a swap of Maine for Ohman would give the O™s a pitcher that could be part of the solution next year. The Mets desperately need a legitimate second lefty to help Pedro Feliciano. Eventually the O™s will deal Guthrie and Millwood so the need for a starting pitcher is there as well.

In Which “The Lady Gaga Clubhouse Incident” Enters Yankee Lore

Posted in Baseball at 10:28 am by

Prior to yesterday’s jetstream-aided 5-3 defeat of the Mets, the Yankees’ powerful offense had been neutralized the pitching trio of Jamie Moyer, Kyle Kendrick and Hisanori Takahashi, a chain of events that might cause the most reasonable person to wonder just what the fuck Alex Rodriguez and Robinson Cano were doing entertaining Lady Gaga (above) shortly after Friday’s loss.  Since this most reasonable person isn’t blogging or writing for the New York Daily News, however, we’ll have to settle for John Harper.

After two successive losses in which their starting pitchers, CC Sabathia and A.J. Burnett, failed to cover first base, followed by the Lady Gaga-in-the-clubhouse incident Friday night after they’d been humiliated by the Mets, the Yankee high command – specifically Hal Steinbrenner, GM Brian Cashman and team president Randy Levine – were said to be furious at the embarrassing state of events. Especially since none of them apparently knew about Lady Gaga until they read about it in the newspapers Saturday morning.

One can only imagine the carnage if George Steinbrenner – the old George Steinbrenner – had walked into the clubhouse after Friday night’s shutout loss to the hated Mets and seen the trampy pop tart frolicking and holding court with his players
. It doesn’t appear if anyone is going to lose his or her job for the breach of security, although as one Yankee official confided: “We’re embarrassed by what happened and it’s been addressed.”

Any similiarity between the first sentence of Harper’s 2nd quoted paragraph and a Saturday tweet from Newsday’s Ken Davidoff is purely coincidental, I’m sure.

06.19.10

June 19, 2010 : Of Danzig Instores And Evil Tweeters

Posted in twitter twatter at 8:24 pm by

  • McCarver’s cracking up over the Vladmir Shpunt story. Please, no one tell Tim the Red Sox once hired Eric Van. He might totally lose it. #
  • 3 wrong things all at once : Wevie Stonder on the mound, Buck on the microphone, Vin Scully in the stands #
  • Joe Buck just said something funny. Perhaps for the first time in history. I’m totally confused now. #
  • big question in the world of rock criticism : will Paul Shirley give Pavement’s sat estival gig a better review than @ZamboniRodeo did? #
  • Youkilis, HR over the Monster. McCarver has not asked if it was the most satisfying HR of Youk’s career. #
  • Danzig instore in Boise http://mysp.ac/dBHsCV NO ONE AT THE RECORD EXCHANGE MAY LOOK DANZING IN THE EYE #
  • McCarver asks if Manny’s 6th inning at Fenway today HR “was the most satisfying HR he’s ever hit?” Yeah, Ramirez HATES Tim Wakefield. #
  • TOO SOON RT @CursedCleveland: Was ESPN being cute w/ “Humanitarian Bol Dies at 47″? some want to see the death of bowl system but come on. #
  • surely Yankee Stadium is beyond yr jurisdiction? RT @RealSheriffJoe I’m rounding up deadbeat dads . Over 30 in custody. Happy Father’s day. #
  • once I find that quality content, I’ll be sure to let you all know. DON’T WAIT UP! #
  • going by Bissinger logic, since I have 5 times as many followers as LowIQEmpireNYY, I’m free to swipe his quality content sans attribution #
  • RT @ShawnCBagger: Heavy Metal just took a moment to mention the passing of Dio after he was thrown from the ring. Lucha libre! Ha! #
  • bummed out by the death of Quentin Crisp in 1999? Cheer the fuck up.! He’s alive, well and no less pithy the in form of @EvilEmpireNYY #
  • if I’m gonna be called “a bitter clown”, best that it comes from a subliterate apologist for a drunken, slovenly narcissist (@EvilEmpireNYY) #
  • I’ve said nothing of pies, Rollo. That was a retweet from @scratchbomb. Best of luck w/ the adult literacy classes. http://bit.ly/aLzR0P #
  • RT @benschwartzy Tony Hayward went yachting? Shouldn’t part of his sentence be that water gets a retraining order on him? #
  • RT @scratchbomb: Reyes claps when he gets a big hit. that can’t measure up to the quiet dignity of smashing cream pies in people’s faces #
  • magazine is too small for a head shot that huge RT @neelc13: Joba never had a spread in GQ? #
  • Reyes – the most innocent embodiment of joie de vire in MLB. Joba – worse than Hitler, Jim Belushi and Bubba Sparxxx COMBINED #hyperbole #
  • by contrast, Chamberlain is a sickening, repulsive lout better suited for a cable reality show than the field of athletic competition. #
  • so what’s the diff between Jose and Joba? simple – former is an exciting, multi-talented ballplayer whose love of the game is infectious… # Read the rest of this entry »

Fantastic Press Releases Of WC2010, Pt. I

Posted in Football, World Cup 2010 at 6:14 pm by

France have had a nightmarish start to this month’s World Cup in South Africa, being held to a scoreless draw with Uruguay followed by a decisive loss yesterday to Mexico. The latter match featured a halftime bust-up between coach Raymond Domenech and Chelsea striker Nicolas Anelka (above), he of a prior era’s sulk-fests that once drove Arsne Wenger to distraction. With Anelka allegedly telling Domenech, “go fuck yourself, you son of a whore,” during a halftime chat yesterday, the France Football Association issued the following statement.

The words of Nicolas Anelka against Raymond Domenech, are totally unacceptable to the FFF, the French football and the values they uphold.

Informed later in the evening of Friday the serious incident during the halftime of the match France “ Mexico (0-2), the Federation President Jean-Pierre Escalettes has asked Nicolas Anelka in the presence of the captain Patrice Evra to present an official apology to the French public opinion and to regret his remarks to Raymond Domenech, the staff and 23 players from the team of France.

Upon refusal by the player to deliver a public apology, he made the decision in full agreement with the coach and members of the official delegation attending Knysna exclude Nicolas Anelka group. This will leave this evening the base camp of Team France.

It Takes Just 67 Seconds (Or Less) For Steve Nash…

Posted in Basketball, World Cup 2010 at 4:43 pm by

…to leapfrog Ron Artest with the most insane, (semi) NBA-related clip of the week.

Manute Bol, RIP

Posted in Basketball at 1:56 pm by

The Kansas City Star is reporting that 9-year NBA veteran Manute Bol, who received relatively scant recognition after his playing days for his activism and humanitarian efforts, has passed away at the age of 47 after a long bout with kidney failure.  Jerod Morris of Midwest Sports Fans paid tribute to the 7′ 7″ Sudanese center just a few weeks ago.

Manute Bol has seemingly always fought with every bit of his strength to make the Sudan a better place for the people that he left behind “ but certainly never forgot “ when he moved to the United States. In fact, Bol never really left the Sudan behind. He clearly carried the burden of his nation™s plight during every step along his path to the NBA and, much like Dikembe Mutombo after him, used his God-given height to play a game that would pay him well and afford him the opportunity to make a difference on a contient that so desperately needs difference makers.

Step Aside, A-Rod. There’s A New Most Hateable Yankee

Posted in Baseball at 1:03 pm by

Have a seat, Joba Chamberlain.  Take 5, Twit-tard Nick Swisher.  After the Yankees were baffled by Hisanori Takahashi last night, The Legend Of Cecilio Guante‘s Cecilio’s Scribe nominated Bombers backstop Francisco Cervelli (“Johnny Bench, Mike Piazza and Benito Santiago all rolled into one — at least in his own mind”) as “My New Favorite Yankee To Hate”.

He’s over-exuberant, cocky, theatrical and antagonistic. No matter if it’s the fourth inning of a game they’re losing, the seventh inning of a blowout win or the top of the first, Francisco is fist-pumping and primal screaming on every inning-ending strikeout. If he throws someone out at second? Well, then be prepared for an even more enthusiastic celebration. The Terminator has eliminated you, Mr. Baserunner, and he will now show you up in his home plate mini-dance, fist-pump, animal roar routine.

You Yankees fans sitting there claiming sour grapes on a good, young player? You’ve got the second part right. From what I’ve seen, Cervelli is undoubtedly talented and the heir apparent to Jorge. He could learn a few things from Posada, though, on what it means to be a professional. I’m all for enthusiasm, but Cervelli’s routine borders on amateur hour. The best examples could’ve been his ridiculous theatrics around the plate last night on two balls in the dirt.

Despite picking both cleanly, Francisco immediately proceeded to dramatically turn behind him on multiple occasions acting as if the ball had scooted past him towards the backstop. The acts were so over-the-top that “gamesmanship” is too respectful a descriptor. Ruben Tejada’s laugh after casually returning to first after the first airing of the show were telling — Cervelli’s antics were a joke.

Cervelli’s behavior, funnily enough, comes under scrutiny the same day WFAN’s Mike Francesa — surely the arbiter of all forms of etiquette — cited the Mets’ Jose Reyes for the shortstop’s penchant for offending the Yankees.  Hopefully Reyes’ two HR’s this afternoon in successive at bats against Phil Hughes were celebrated in a modest enough manner without violating the sacred ground that is the Nu Stadium.

Jordan Kin, Fiercely Protective Of Dad’s Grand Gestures

Posted in Basketball, twitter twatter at 10:43 am by

No, Jeff, there was nothing surprising about it.  Unless you’re caught off guard by Bryant trying to claim one of your father’s signature moments after shooting 6 for 24 (and arguably being the third most valuable Laker on the floor during Game 7)

06.18.10

June 17, 2010 – CSTB Tweets About Robbery, Mental Health

Posted in twitter twatter at 7:24 pm by

Remembering WC2006 And The High Ratings Generated By Dave O’Brien

Posted in Baseball, Football, Sports Radio, Sports TV, World Cup 2010 at 6:44 pm by

There’s not been nearly as much outpouring of public fury over ESPN’s employment of Martin Tyler to do play-by-play for this summer’s World Cup from South Africa as there was just 4 years ago when longtime baseball announcer Dave O’Brien worked the tournament alongside former US international Marcelo Balboa. At the time, O’Brien dismissed such criticism as the work “a petulant little clique of soccer fans. There™s not many of them, but they™re mean-spirited. ¦ And they™re not really the audience we want to reach anyway. With such defensiveness in mind, the Boston Globe’s Chad Finn quizzed O’Brien — currently doing Red Sox broadcasts for WEEI — about what it’s like to watch the planet’s biggest sporting event without making a fool of yourself.

œI™m watching every minute. Watching every minute I can see,™™ said O™Brien. œI think it™s spectacular,™™ he added. œI think I™m there. I don™t feel like I™m missing it because, as a fan now, I get to experience what everyone else experienced in ™06, this incredible event unfolding day by day. So I don™t miss it.™™

O™Brien, who was teamed with underwhelming analyst Marcelo Balboa four years ago, says now that the criticism doesn™t damage his fond memories.

œIt was a tremendously positive experience,™™ O™Brien said. œWe got nominated for an Emmy for the work we did in ™06, the ratings were great. All the barometers we wanted to hit, we hit.”

O™Brien, who said it was his decision œto remove himself from the equation this year,™™ has clearly moved past any frustrations he harbored four years ago.

œLooking back, I think in some way, we helped move the coverage forward in a direction it needed to go,™™ he said. œThere were some growing pains there. I think that to get to this level, at the level of the presentation the games are at now, maybe that had to happen.”

Mets, SNY To Temporarily Replace Ron Darling With Unproven Nobody

Posted in Baseball, Sports TV at 3:27 pm by

(only one of these men is working in baseball)

The New York Post’s Michael Starr reports that Jerry Seinfeld will join Gary Cohen and Keith Hernandez in the SNY booth for 3 innings of the Mets’ home game against Detroit next Wednesday evening.

It will be Seinfeld’s first visit to the SNY booth and the first time he and Hernandez have talked about the famous, 1992 episode called “The Boyfriend.” The episode featured Keith asking gym-pal Jerry to help him move out of his apartment — and being accused by Kramer and Newman of spitting on them after his error at first base cost the Mets a game.

“That was a baptism under fire,” Hernandez says of his “Seinfeld” gig. “I think there’s always the fear of the unknown . . . and I was terrified, to be honest.

“I have a very hard time watching that episode, period. I’ve only seen it once or twice.

“Let’s be realistic — I’m not Marlon Brando, and I never took acting lessons.”

Not to say I’m not looking forward to Wednesday’s broadcast, but I’d much rather see the YES Network attempt to pair Larry David-as-George Steinbrenner (in his early 90′s physical/mental fitness, of course) with Michael Kay.

Bob Brenly – Breathing Down Piniella’s Neck From The WGN Booth

Posted in Baseball, Sports TV at 12:36 pm by

Cubs manager Lou Piniella responded to recent criticism on the part of White Sox announcer Steve Stone by saying, “We™ve got a lot of people here that haven™t managed and won any games in the big leagues, but they know everything.”
If Stone’s managerial resume seems a bit thin to offer advise, Lou might be slightly more impressed with the professional background of WGN commentator Bob Brenly (above), who guided the Diamondbacks to a World Series title in 2001. “Does this read like Brenly is lobbying for the manager’s position to anyone else?” asks Kevin Rys of Brenly blasting the Cubs’ poor fundamentals during a recent radio interview. Well, yeah. But if you’re gonna lobby for a job, what’s the point of doing it without being heard? (Gary Carter, unavailable for comment.

“Ever since I’ve been here in Chicago, even going back to the Dusty Baker days, these teams — and you hate to lump them all together because obviously there’s different personnel every year — but the same problems keep coming up, poor baserunning, poor defense,” Brenly said Wednesday on “The Waddle & Silvy Show” on ESPN 1000. “The lack of timely hitting affects every team in the major leagues at one point or another, but it’s the lack of solid fundamentals on a daily basis that really gets to me, and I think gets to a lot of fans.

Brenly took exception Piniella batting pitcher Carlos Zambrano in the bottom of the sixth during Wednesday’s 9-5 loss to Oakland. There were two outs with a runner on second and the Cubs trailing 5-4. Zambrano popped to second, and then was relieved at the top of the seventh.

“I would much rather have the worst pinch hitter I have available off the bench up at the plate rather than any pitcher. I just don’t think there’s anybody in the major leagues right now — and that includes Micah Owings, who may be the best hitting pitcher to come down the pike in a long time — I would rather have a hitter up there. Even if it means you have to burn one of your players.”

Pirates : What We Do Is Secret

Posted in Baseball at 10:32 am by

(because no one wants to see another photograph of John Russell — least of all Pirates players or fans, here’s a snapshot of Darby Crash, instead)

After a 99 loss campaign in 2009, who amongst us wouldn’t have concluded the Pittsburgh Pirates were on the verge of a breakthrough 2010? I’m sure fans and pundits alike are shocked to see the Bucs at 20 games below .500 on the 18th of June, and as such, can fully sympathize with Pittsburgh ownership’s decision last October to give general manager Neal Huntington and manager John Russell one year contract extensions. Since the people of Pittsburgh are a hard-working, humble lot, it would’ve been unseemly for the Pirates to actually announce to the media that such extensions had been offered. Or perhaps it was an oversight amidst all the other important announcements a chronically last-place baseball franchise might have to make during the late autumn. EIther way, the Post-Gazette’s Ron Cook has little sympathy for all the pressures faced by the Pirates’ front office, insisting, “their professional sports record of 17-going-on-18 consecutive years of losing hasn’t happened by accident.”

Huntington and Russell were asked repeatedly about their contracts during the season, as was club president Neil Coonelly. They were put in the awkward position by Coonelly of, if not outright lying, bending the truth. The dishonesty was most disrespectful to the fans. Insulting, actually.

After someone squealed the news to FoxSports.com earlier Thursday, Coonelly was forced to make the announcement at the worst possible time. He and the organization look like fools.

Not surprisingly, Coonelly defended the extensions. He praised Huntington for the Xavier Nady-Damaso Marte trade, which brought Jose Tabata, Ross Ohlendorf, Jeff Karstens and Daniel McCutchen, and for finding gems Garrett Jones and Evan Meek from other clubs. “Neal had the tough assignment of turning over our roster and building the organization the right way at a time when he had very little to work with. He’s had great success in terms of scouting and drafting young players.”

As for Russell, Coonelly said, “John has a tremendous, intense passion for winning baseball and developing young players. He is an outstanding teacher. The players respect him, trust him and believe in his leadership.”

It might have been fine if that’s all Coonelly had said. But in the team’s announcement and a later interview, he said, “Contracts are irrelevant. If we believe someone isn’t getting the job done, a contract won’t prevent us from doing what needs to be done. We’ll make a change.”

The Pirates make what should be an exciting announcement about two key employees and their future. At the same time, they publicly bring up the possibility that one or both guys will be fired, maybe before their extensions even kick in.

Analyze This : Tru Warier’s Once In A Lifetime Academy Award Acceptance Speech

Posted in Basketball, Mental Health at 7:17 am by

Dr. Allen Lans. Jennifer Melfi. Robert Hartley, Ph.d. Jonathan Katz. YOU’RE ALL WINNERS!

06.17.10

June 17, 2010 : THAT BUZZING SOUND IS CSTB TWEETING

Posted in twitter twatter at 7:24 pm by

  • RE http://bit.ly/aGxs3P @TylerKepner on Patrick Ewing at tonights #Phillies at #Yankees game. Insert your own Gold Club joke. #
  • @StevePopper‘s right http://bit.ly/9GxqJV . If this is Jake’s audition for the Mets, I’d sooner trade for BRIAN Westbrook #
  • Rog, not a Tecmo Bowl guy RT @ebertchicago: Find me a person who ‘d value any video game above “Huckleberry Finn,” and I’ll show you a fool. #
  • you’re still welcome to pay a cover and drink, however. RT @Red_7: seriously. if you can’t spell you can’t play our club. end of story. #
  • Chris Berman flashing his sock-her knowledge by dropping Landon Donovan and Wayne Rooney’s names. Is there nothing this man cannot do? #
  • go to the library? RT @wallybackman86: @cstbtweet FUCK YOU, YOU LITTLE PIPSQEAK! How’s that for ya, guy? What else you gonna do this summer? #
  • RT @Neil_Hamburger: Scary map of the USA: http://tinyurl.com/2f995yb #
  • ladies, pay close attn. to this deep thinker RT @paulthenshirley: I’m really happy that girls-not-shaving-their-armpits thing never took off #
  • was Touchdown Jesus a Graven Image? execs at Fatal Erection recs unavailable for comment http://alturl.com/gaps #
  • the very spry Blanco scores (PK, 79th minute), #FRA 0, #MEX 2 #worldcup #
  • Game 7 hype video. The key to Celtics’ (potential) 18th title? “LA’s NEVER HAD SCALABRINE” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hs4w7UOwWK0 #
  • Javier Hernanez looks offside, scores the easiest of goals , 64th min, #FRA 0, #MEX 1 Andy MacPhail thinks France oughta rebuild #worldcup #
  • #1 was “get cursed out by Wally Backman” RT @BKCyclones: Cyclones ranked #2 by Time Out New York on “101 Things To Do This Summer!” #
  • awesome. So maybe we can forfeit a bronze medal . RT @UKCoachCalipari: I hope one day to be involved with our national team #
  • agree w/ @craigcalcaterra that KC The Town doesn’t deserve disses from Sports Putz, Deadspin.But why reward David Glass for ruining Royals? #
  • surely I’m not the only person who finds the M&M’s Pretzel commercial homophobic. How is this not a trending topic? #

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The Sophisticated Humor Of Chris Evans

Posted in Football, Racism Corner, twitter twatter at 6:25 pm by

(l-r : Danny Baker, Evans, Gazza)

Readers of a certain vintage (ie., old fuckers like me) can remember when the biggest soccer scandal to envelope mega-annoying entertainer Chris Evans was an ill-advised pub crawl/kebab-eating contest with Paul Gascoigne. Fast forward a generation later, and Evans — now ensconced at the BBC’s Radio 2 — has found a whole new medium with which to fall from favor.  From the Mirror :

Evans came under fire from some of his own followers on the social networking site Twitter after he retweeted a joke that had been circulating across Twitter.

The star was accused of being ‘politically incorrect’ and ‘offensive™ after he posted: ‘You give an African 2 pounds a month and what do they do? Buy a bloody trumpet.’

Following the post, Twitter user iPilates wrote in response: ‘Not very politically correct that one. A bit Bernard Manning.’ while PeterHeslop said: ‘Did you re-tweet this to highlight xenophobia or capitalist exploitation?’

Evans, 44, later removed the post from his Twitter page before apologising – claiming he had not read the joke properly before forwarding it to his followers.