Blink And You’ll Miss It – A Zine’s Revival (That No One Asked For) Is Upon Us

Posted in Conflict, Internal Affairs, non-sporting journalism, Rock Und Roll at 9:07 am by

There’s few pursuits less dignified than sports blogging, but publishing a fanzine certainly comes to mind.  I’ve little bit of experience with both pursuits, though I’ve not attempted the later in, oh, 22 years. With any luck, I’ll wait even longer before trying it again.


Terry Collins’ Words Of Warning For Valdespin : Dial It Down Or You’ll Get Drilled In The Dick

Posted in Baseball at 4:03 pm by

Mets IF Jordany Valdespin took a Justin Verlander fastball to, well, the balls yesterday, an unfortunate incident that gave the former’s manager an opportunity to deliver an etiquette lecture, as transcribed by the New York Post’s Mike Puma.

Collins has told Valdespin this spring to eliminate some of his antics, warning that he might become a target for pitchers. One such warning came two weeks ago after Valdespin faked a bunt leading off a game against Nationals ace Stephen Strasburg. In the same at-bat, Valdespin singled and received a glare from Strasburg as he ran to first base.

“We’re going to settle some of that stuff down,” Collins said. “[Valdespin] has been told a lot in the last couple of years about how to handle himself on the major league field, especially when you are a young player. He understands it, he’s adjusting to it and once in a while you always get caught up in the moment.

“When you’ve been doing some things your whole life sometimes you have a little difficulty making some adjustments, but he will make them. We’ve got some good veterans on this team. They will make him.”

Both Collins and Valdespin said they doubted Verlander was throwing at the player.

An Important Message From The Entertainment Division Of Cumbucket Media

Posted in Austin, Internal Affairs, Rock Und Roll at 12:03 pm by

Let’s clear up one ugly rumor — we didn’t specifically tell Prince he wasn’t wanted on this bill. But we’ve got too many bands already. For the man Barney Hoskyns dubbed, “The Imp Of The Perverse” to respond by scheduling a competing show at La Zona Rosa is not only a desperate move at the 11th hour, but it smacks of the sort of petty jealousy that’s unbecoming for one of the all-time greats. Maybe Prince Rodgers Nelson should come clean and admit to his legion of fans this vindictive act is nothing more than poorly disguised payback for my refusing to give him Jaqui Dustdevil’s phone number at Nell’s so many years ago (someone in that scene had to respect the institution of marriage).

Prince, you’re better than this. Cancel your pathetic little show at LZR and come drink in the Trailer Space parking lot. If you’re really lucky, you might even find an old Cave Dogs or Naked Prey promo in the clearance bin.


Yahoo’s Wojnarowski To Knight : Take Pride In Your Posterization

Posted in Basketball at 11:46 pm by

Pistons PG Brandon Knight didn’t get the memo that all Clipper dunks are meant to be uncontested ; after being clobbered by DeAndre Jordan Sunday, Knight tweeted, “It wasn’t in the scouting reports that the clippers threw lobs lol.”  Amongst those not laughing out loud — Yahoo Sports’ Adrian Wojnarowski, who sees parallels in Kendrick Perkins refusing to concede the lane to lob recipient Blake Griffin.

Jordan made a spectacular play. No one will soon forget it. So congratulations and all. Jordan has a $43 million contract and yet still doesn’t have one offensive move, an ability to score outside the paint. Yes, he can leap, dunk on little guys. And somehow that makes him an achiever in the sport now. After this, perhaps even a folk hero.

For Brandon Knight, who had the guts to stand in there, there were prominent people writing that he had been raped and assaulted and killed on Sunday night in Los Angeles. Eight inches shorter and 80 pounds lighter, Knight understood the right thing is seldom ever the most popular. Brandon Knight didn’t run and hide, didn’t spare himself the humiliation.

The culture of this sport has never been so backward, never so twisted. Hell of a dunk out of DeAndre Jordan, but maybe the wrong player gets the ovation.

Bring Larry Walker The Head Of Alfredo Aceves

Posted in Baseball at 5:26 pm by

Alfredo Aceves (above, right) found himself the center of attention during Saturday’s WBC altercation between Mexico and Canada, with Canada coach Larry Walker (left) suggesting the Boston reliever was, well, possessed. Far less likely to demonize, WEEI.com’s Alex Speier sought Aceves side of the brawl.

Asked if he knew why Canada or Tyson Gillies seemed intent on going after him, Aceves could not offer a specific answer.

“Who’s Gillies? Oh, no. That was the first time I saw him there. Like I said, it’s part of the game. He was trying to defend his team. If it were me, I’d try to do the same thing,” said Aceves. “What can I say? It didn’t surprise me when he threw me to the floor. I reacted to it, because I didn’t do nothing to him. I was just calming down. The fighting was with the pitcher and the hitter. So I was saying, ‘Calm down, man, calm down, come on, man.’ And he just grabbed me and threw me on the floor. So I was like, ‘I’m going to throw you on the floor, man.’ Then when I jumped in to this guy, I had seven guys against me.”

Asked if he was concerned about the possibility of injury to his elbow or shoulder in the pile up, Aceves suggested his focus was elsewhere.

“You’re locked in. You’re just trying to defend and knock them out. That’s it. We were trying to defense ourselves. We didn’t do nothing to him. He just threw me,” said Aceves.

Guest Editorial : It’s Like The Best Bits Of “Midnight Blue” (In The Daytime)

Posted in The Marketplace at 1:38 pm by

(editor’s note :  tireless consumer advocate / baseball executive Randy L. continues to see his indepth reviews of products and services censored by the Thought Police at Yelp.com.  Given CSTB’s long-standing commitment to free expression, it only seemed fitting to give Randy the floor – GC)

Dear Friends,

if you’ve ever considered using the online backup service OpenDrive, here’s a helpful hint : DON’T. Their upload speeds are slower than George Kennedy Chris Snyder chasing a purse-snatcher. Their customer service staff are as helpful as an ebola virus on a submarine (or a Nick Swisher with a pen and paper). To paraphrase my old buddy Arnold Diaz, FUCK THESE GUYS.


Bautista : Respect For Baseball’s Unwritten Rules Takes Precendence (Over Written Rules)

Posted in Baseball at 6:17 pm by

It’s commonly believed Saturday’s WBC brawl between Mexico and Canada —- sparked by Arnold Leon drilling Rene Tosoni after the latter’s teammate, Chris Robinson, bunted to lead off the top of the 9th with Canada up by 6 runs — would’ve been avoided had it been fully understood Canada needed to score as many runs as possible to ensure advancement in the tournament (particularly after being routed by Italy the night prior).  Quizzed by MLB.com’s Gregor Chisholm, international etiquette expert Jose Bautista seemed to suggest Leon’s response was justified.

“I believe in the unwritten rules of the game,” Bautista told reporters Sunday morning. “They should be respected. It’s a code amongst players and everybody who plays baseball at a level higher than Little League knows what it is and there’s no excuse.”

The comments can be taken as somewhat controversial considering Canada needed to score as many runs as possible because of the tournament’s rules. If the United States had lost to Italy on Saturday night, then there was a scenario in which three teams — including Canada — could have finished tied with a 1-2 record.

The tiebreaker then would have been based on run differential. In a regular-season game, bunting to lead off the ninth would have been considered a definite no-no, but Bautista felt the same guidelines should have been applied in this scenario as well.

It’s a view that isn’t necessarily shared by Blue Jays manager John Gibbons.

“The run differential matters,” Gibbons said. “Everybody knows that, so it shouldn’t really surprise anybody. If that determines whether you move on or not, I’m sure the other side would have probably done the same thing, I would think.”

Halos Hopeful : I’m Like Manti Te’o (Just Not Nearly As Famous Or Ridiculed)

Posted in Baseball, mistaken I.D. at 6:01 pm by

While the media and public like have obsessed over the case of former Heisman candidate Manti Te’o ill-fated online relationship, I’m not without sympathy for the Notre Dame linebacker.  When I was not much older than Te’o, I had my own series of intensely personal correspondence via the then-cutting edge CompuServe platform.  Eventually, I came to learn I’d not been chatting with an 18 year-old self-described Kelly Bundy lookalike, but instead, a middle-aged GNC clerk named Irving.  Even worse, when Irv found out he wasn’t chatting with the real Joan Jett, there were hurt feelings all over the place.  On the bright side, neither one of us was asked to deliver any packages to Buenos Aries.

But I disgress.  Te’o's embarrassing experience has led to a greater appreciation of the modern phenomenon known as “Catfishing”, and Angels pitching prospect Michael Roth (above)  tells the LA Times’ Bill Shankin, he could barely believe his good fortune when he received a text from a stranger reading, “aren’t you the cute Michael that I met?”, shortly after the 2010 College World Series.

That started a stream of flattering texts and alluring phone calls from a woman Roth never had met, including the requisite visits that inevitably were canceled at the last minute.

Roth said he sensed something fishy within a few weeks. He played along for a year, in the process discovering that three of his college teammates also had been in touch with the same woman, who claimed her name was Hope Porter.

“As athletes, you’re a target in general,” Roth said Friday. “I think it’s part of the problem with a guy being a guy, when you’re younger. You see an attractive girl that tweets at you or texts at you or whatever, and you’re somewhat intrigued.

“It’s hard being a guy and not using your brain at times.”

So, as a fellow victim of the so-called “Catfish” phenomenon, could Roth sympathize with Te’o?

“To an extent,” Roth said, laughing. “You can’t fall in love over a phone. … I wasn’t sleeping with a phone, that’s for sure.”


Christie Vs. Russo : When Two Springsteen Fans (Who Miss The Boat On The Lyrical Content) Fail To Get Along

Posted in Sports Radio at 5:36 pm by

Earlier this week, Sirius/XM announced they’d be removing Bruce Murray from Mad Dog Radio’s mid-morning slot in favor of former “Loudmouths” co-host Adam Schein. Given that the satellite broadcaster chooses to surround Chris Russo (above) with the likes of Dino Costa and Scott Wetzel, dismissing Murray in favor of Schein seems entirely in character with MDR’s addiction to bluster. Among those who took exception to the move : the current Governor of New Jersey, Chris Christie. From the New York Daily News’ Bob Raissman :

Christie, relentless as usual, characterized Schein as a “whiney guy with glasses.”

“Are you kidding me? Adam Schein for Bruce Murray?” Christie asked. “Do you want to lose ears all across America? This guy (Schein) is unlistenable. Russo said the Governor was being a bit harsh.

“No, it’s not a little harsh,” Christie shot back. “Do you watch the Jets postgame show (that Schein appears on on SportsNet New York)? This is unbelievable.”

Christie is fond of Murray. He has appeared on his show. Friendship, and his definition of good radio, was all the motivation the Guv needed to pound away at Schein and belittle Russo.

“You’re kicking him (Murray) off ‘Mad Dog Radio.’ It’s outrageous,” Christie said. “Adam Schein? Come on. Chris, I love you as a radio host but your managerial decisions are lacking.”

“My management skills are not as good as yours, let’s put it that way. I have been inept,” Russo admitted. “Is this phone call more because Bruce is getting a raw deal or is this because you think Adam is a bad hire?”

“Both,” Christie said. “It’s a raw deal. And Adam, I don’t get it. You want this guy leading into you? What do you have, a death wish?”

Because The Canseco-With-A-Syringe-In-His-Butt Bobblehead Would’ve Been Tasteless…

Posted in Baseball at 1:40 pm by

….even for Todd McFarlane.  Above image culled from Eye On Baseball’s Bobblehead Project.


Ex-Knick Renaldo Balkman : Doing His Best To Put The Phillipines Basketball Association On The Map

Posted in Basketball at 6:27 pm by

Austin Persons I’d Sooner Trust With ‘Things To Do’ Tips Than The Sword :

Posted in Austin, Rock Und Roll, Tourism at 4:24 pm by

(above : the late Paul Bearer and ‘Taker, both dismayed to learn TV Torso are keeping a low profile this SXSW)

The Undertaker
Art Acevedo
Leslie’s corpse
Dan Rather
Boner Sludge
Andy Langer
Rick Perry
Luke Winkie

In all seriousness, it should come as a huge blow to Kerby Lane to learn one of history’s lamest bands believes their service sucks. Only a TV outlet owned by James Dolan would characterize The Sword as “madmen”. Though I understand they’re miffed about the late night service at Kerby Lane.


An Open Letter To Brian Cashman

Posted in Baseball at 11:37 pm by

(EDITOR’S NOTE : from time to time, famed baseball executive / tireless consumer advocate Randy L. brings his unique worldview to CSTB. In the wake of Yankee GM Brian Cashman’s recent injury while skydiving, Randy graciously agreed to address the matter, with his fee being donated to the charity of his choice – GC)

HEADS UP, dweebs, shut-ins and similar losers of the sports blogotopia or whatever you’re calling it these days. Nice to see CSTB finally has as many advertisers as readers — keep up the good work!

When I got the phone call the other day telling me that a dear member of the Yankee family had jumped out of an airplane, I’ll admit my first thought was, “please G-d, let it be Michael Kay”. Upon learning, however, the would-be daredevil was our handsomely compensated General Manager, my mood immediately darkened. Coming on the heels of Brian’s highly publicized marital problems, it would take some doing for him to find a more embarrassing way to make the tabloid front pages, but FUCK ME if he didn’t manage it.

We’ve got enough to worry about as is, what with every player capable of actually selling tickets either coming back from serious injury or managing to disable themselves before the season starts. But if members of the front office follow suit, particularly in such ill-advised fashion, we’ve got no moral authority when it comes to humiliating low-IQ / high body fat relief pitchers who think a fucking trampoline is an acceptable leisure apparatus for an adult male.

So with that in mind, Brian, I’m asking you to exercise better judgement in the future. If you’re still having some kind of mid-life freakout, maybe Waldman would be willing to role-play as that lunatic who tried blackmailing you. If that’s not enough and you’ve still got the itch to take a flying fucking leap from a great height, I think I speak for ownership and the entire Yankee Universe when I ask, nay, beg, that next time YOU TAKE A-ROD WITH YOU.

Randy L.

40 Somethings Across The Nation Demand To Know Barry Bonds’ Weight Loss Secret

Posted in Baseball, Fitness at 10:09 pm by

It’s not every day the greatest home run hitter of all time shows up for the Opening Day of Malibu Little League, nor is it a common occurrence that a public appearance by the Sultan Of Surly is greeted with cries of, “what have you done with the rest of Barry Bonds?” From the Malibu Times’ Dick Dornan (link courtesy Repoz and Baseball Think Factory)

After the opening ceremony, Bonds sat and watched his godson play as the AAA Giants rallied from an 8-1 deficit to defeat the AAA Indians, 11-9. In true Bonds fashion, Banvard walked twice, just as his godfather did a major-league record 2,558 times. Bonds stayed the entire time and greeted the players after the game. “To me, he is the greatest player of all time. For him to come out and throw out the first pitch in my boys’ little league is special,” said Royce Clayton, a former teammate of Bonds on the Giants from 1993-95 whose two sons and two daughters play MLL. “It’s a special moment that I’m sure the boys will always look back and remember. Myself as well.”

This Free Advertisement For A Lenny Dykstra Bio Might Save All Of Us The Trouble Of Reviewing (Or Reading) The Book

Posted in Baseball, non-sporting journalism at 4:05 pm by

From time to time, I receive solicitations from a publicist representing various authors and publishers of sports related books. On many occasions, I’m offered review copies of the tomes in question (sometimes arriving days or weeks after the mainstream media’s reviews have run) or the opportunity to interview the authors, which as you’ve probably already guessed, is not very appealing most of the time.

That said, today’s press release touting the April publication of Christopher Frankie’s ‘Nailed! : The Improbable Rise & Spectacular Fall Of Lenny Dykstra”, did cause me to wonder for about 30 seconds whether or not I’d be keen to check the book out (“from World Series hero and millionaire entrepreneur to homeless C-List deadbeat chiseler, snatching purses, assaulting prostitutes and hanging out with fellow-pariah Charlie Sheen…the truth sometimes truly is stranger than fiction”).  But when they’ve already given some of the best bits away in the press release, why bother?

NAILED!  covers:
Dykstra’s childhood and early years in Southern California;
Dykstra’s assumed and admitted (then denied) anabolic steroid boasts and abuse;
The troubling allegations that Dykstra had helped a friend bet thousands of dollars on baseball in 1993;
Dykstra’s history of substance abuse, including cocaine, drinking and prescription drugs;
Dykstra’s round-the-clock schedule for employees, including marathon meetings in his hotel room;
The bitter legal fight with Dykstra’s Players Club magazine publisher, Doubledown;
His high employee turnover (eight editors in the magazine’s first year of publication);
The ugly family schism after he fires his whole family from his car wash business;
“Pulling a hammy” while sparring on national television with Fox & Friends’ Brian Kilmeade;
The inside story behind the dirty reporting on his win-loss record in his newsletter “Nails by the Numbers”;
How Dykstra swiped the payroll money from his employees, so that he could redo the kitchen in his mansion;
His freakishly weird relationship with his complicit enabler and assistant, Dorothy;
How he began dismantling his mansion near the end in order to sell its appliances and light fixtures to continue to finance his over-the-top lifestyle.

Christopher Frankie—one of the longest-serving members of “Team Dykstra” before the fall—offers a very balanced account of Dykstra’s troubles. He has no axe to grind here. He witnessed the three-ring, cross-country circus and devastating collapse first-hand and offers readers the insider’s perspective. Frankie interviewed more than seventy-five of Dykstra’s teammates, coaches, employees, reporters, law enforcement officials, victims, friends, and family. He reviewed thousands of court documents, emails, news articles, text messages and videos.

Dykstra lies, cheats and steals to keep his “big league dreams” alive—whatever it takes. Flaunting a “catch-me-if-you-can attitude” in his private jet, flying above the law of the land and trying to elude his worst nightmare: Life “in the middle”. He has no remorse. It is said that at some point Lenny Dykstra lost his soul. And then he lost everything else. An echo of the Bernie Madoff story, NAILED! is an awe-inspiring chronicle of woe and outrageous behavior that will entertain, astonish and terrify readers.


It Took Some Doing, But We’ve Finally Identified an E-Book Less Substantial Than Jay Mariotti’s

Posted in non-sporting journalism, Rock Und Roll, The Marketplace at 9:30 pm by

From Blabbermouth.net :

A new one-dollar short eBook tells the story — 25 years on — of the making of VAN HALEN’s 1988 album “OU812″.

Author Martin Popoff explains: “It’s always a blast talking with Sammy Hagar, and within this lively read, he’s considerably charitable in giving me the story of this ‘hair metal’-era smash hit from the mighty VAN HALEN.”

In fact, Hagar waxes lyrical about the “magical moments on ‘OU812′. We could do no wrong. We just said, let’s start recording today. We just made a date. We had come off a very lengthy tour for ’5150′ and Eddie had a bunch of riffs he was jamming around. I had a bunch of lyrics in notebooks that I had been thinking about and writing. And we just put them together and jammed in the studio. It was just complete, simple, magic.”

“Ye Olde Metal: Van Halen’s OU812″ is available as a 10-page eBook in high-resolution PDF format from www.zunior.com.

Male Senior Citizens Of Queens Beware : K-Rod Pines For Flushing Return

Posted in Baseball at 8:42 pm by

Does reliever Francisco Rodriguez have a puncher’s chance of returning to the New York Mets?  They’re sorely in need of bullpen help.  He needs a job.  Anyone who’d tolerate his bullshit needs their head examined.  “I would love to [return to the Mets],”  Rodriguez told MLB.com’s Christina DiNicola.  “They’ve got a great coaching staff over there.”  Indeed, and those old guys know K-Rod all too well.

“To come back and redeem myself would be great, because I’ve got to be realistic and honest. You would have to be real blind to not see that I fell when I was there. That’s not even a question. To be able to get one more shot and get it done would be great.”

“I think before I think about that, I just have to prove, ‘[Is] my body, healthy?’” Rodriguez said of whether he would be a closer again. “Do I want to be able to close again? No doubt in my mind. But I have to step back once again and throw the eighth inning again. It’s out of my mind. Just get my job done when it needs to be, and see what happens.”


Not Coming To An Episode Of “MTV Cribs” Anytime Soon : Ex-Sonic Robert Swift

Posted in Basketball, Real Estate at 7:10 pm by

“Animal feces clogs the deck. Walls are punched out on different levels of the house. One even has an autograph. Pizza boxes and beer bottles are piled on the kitchen granite. “  But hey, so much for a guided tour of 12XU‘s offices.  It seems when Eric and Jessica Ko-Dalzell purchased the Sammamish, WA foreclosed mansion that previously belonged to 2004 first-round pick Robert Swift, they had a reasonable expectation the 7-footer wouldn’t still be living there.  After two months waiting for Swift to vacate, it seems the unhappy couple discovered he’d left the premises in less than tip-top condition.  From KOMO TV :

Multiple guns were found in the home. Some appear to be air guns, but live ammo was also found. Dalzell said they also found a handgun.

A makeshift shooting range is in the basement storage area. Eric Dalzell said load-bearing beams have graze marks from bullets, and part of the home’s foundation appeared to stop some of the slugs.

A box of letters from colleges around the nation sat pushed against a downstairs wall. It looked like another trash box. Crests and logos of UCLA, Arizona, UConn and others are jammed together as untold memories of what could have been for Swift.

Though I’m A Sports Blogger, In My Spare Time I Moonlight As A Headhunter For Sirius/XM

Posted in Sports Radio at 6:53 pm by

In the event Sirius-XM cannot come to terms with a contract extension for the sleeveless dynamo known as Dino Costa this summer, the satellite broadcaster will be faced with the daunting task of finding the right sort of host to occupy Mad Dog Radio’s 6-10pm slot. Since I’m a nice guy, I’d like to suggest the station’s executives take a break from finding Scott Wetzel a remedial reading teacher and consider the skill-set of former University Of Miami DL Dan Sileo (above), who suddenly became a free agent this week after being relieved of his duties at Miami’s WQAM. From The Sun-Sentinel’s Dieter Kurtenbach :

Sileo took to Twitter to comment on his firing, saying: “Want to thank the Folks at WQAM for having me…We differ on content…WISH them WELL and GOOD LUCK..I WILL NEVER CHANGE!!!!”

Sileo followed up that tweet with others calling the station “soft” and that “WQAM isn’t for me” because it feared him.

Sileo came to WQAM after leaving Tampa’s WDAE-AM last March. Sileo resigned after he called three black NFL free agents “monkeys.”

Controversy followed Sileo to South Florida. He was suspended by WQAM in January after sending sexist tweets to Fox Sports broadcaster Erin Andrews.

Sileo’s rant following Miami’s September loss to Kansas State went viral on YouTube and extinguished most favor with the Miami fan base. WQAM is the Miami Hurricanes Radio Network’s flagship station.


History’s Most Confusing eBay Auctions, Pt. XVI

Posted in Rock Und Roll, The Marketplace at 11:36 pm by

Perhaps a neckless bass autographed by Inxs’ Gary Gary Beers would have great sentimental value for one of this blog’s readers, but anyone looking to curate their own Rock’n'Roll Hall Of Fame-worthy private collection would prefer to hold out for a leather belt signed by Michael Hutchence.

Content Farm Founder To Leitch : Maybe You Don’t Understand Trickle-Down Blogonomics

Posted in Blogged Down, Sports Journalism, The Marketplace at 8:01 pm by

Last week, Sports On Earth’s Will Leitch called Bleacher Report’s rapid commercial success, “one of the more depressing developments in the sports world, but also one of its most inevitable” (“we’re mad not because Bleacher Report is inherently terrible, but because it always felt like they were cheating…they got huge and popular through internet tricks, rather than establishing a reputation through hard work, consistent quality or even, you know, any sort of point of view whatsoever”).  Much as it pains me to come down on the same side of any issue as Leitch, when he’s right, he’s right.  And B/R founder Bryan Goldberg — no longer with the Turner Sports property — would like to share his response.

A lot of journalists view the Bleacher Report business with contempt. That’s their prerogative. But their attitude is a disservice to their field, and their refusal to evolve will dig them into a deeper hole. Every week, it seems, the industry spits out more ominous news. The “spin off” of Time Inc. is just the latest example. When journalists criticize a publication for “putting profits first,” then they are biting the hand that feeds them. Don’t want profits? Fine. Then don’t expect a job in 10 years.

These journalists are also guilty of closing the door behind them. That is, their bosses are scared to cut newsroom workers, so they just agree to buy-outs and “hiring freezes.” It’s ok to screw over the next generation of journalists, right, so long as you keep your job? Well, guess what? Somebody noticed this phenomenon and offered opportunities to these young college students. We did.

The middle-aged journalists who talk about “cutting your teeth,” and “meritocracy-style journalism” — to use your term — are completely delusional. There is no opportunity for young journalists to prove themselves. They can follow your lead and spend the next four years typing away on Blogger, or they can go to where the audience lives. Bleacher Report has millions of email subscribers and millions of mobile app installations — that sounds like a better place to “cut your teeth.”

There will always be a place for investigative journalism, so long as we have corrupt politicians and insidious corporations. In other words, it isn’t going away. Bleacher Report’s existence is completely separate from such efforts, and it can only help the cause of Pulitzer-caliber investigative journalism. Why? Because one day the large media companies of the world will use the profits from the higher-margin, mass-appeal publications to supplement the lower-margin efforts of investigative and “narrative” journalists. That’s why we have parent companies, synergies, and editorial executives to figure out the appropriate content mix.

Brian Cashman’s Clumsy Salute To The Late Bison Dele

Posted in Baseball at 1:19 pm by

Tough break for Yankees GM Brian Cashman, who fucked his ankle up BIG TIME after jumping out of an airplane. Just to be perfectly clear, Cashman’s leap was motivated by charity, as opposed to say, attempted suicide, but either way, Joba Chamberlain can be excused if he’s cracking a smile this afternoon.


The Los Angeles Clippers – Past & Present Leaders At Getting Hit In The Dick

Posted in Basketball at 9:08 pm by

Serge Ibaka’s blatant assault on the crotch of Clippers C Blake Griffin earlier today will undoubtedly be the talk of sports radio & TV Monday, however, students of modern NBA history are all-too aware this is not the first time a member of Donald Sterling’s lovely franchise has suffered such a fate. From CSTB, 4/30/2006  (“Reggie Evans Charged With Cock Block”) :

The NBA Playoffs are only 8 days old, but we’ll struggle to find a hotter story than today’s coverage of the Clippers’ Game 3 win over the Nuggets by the Denver Post’s Mark Kizla.

You don’t expect to tune in a playoff game on the tube and see a display so offensive it should be rated TV-14 for sexual situations.

It was obscene, not to mention cowardly, the way Denver forward Reggie Evans touched the private parts of L.A. center Chris Kaman during the second quarter.

“I felt violated,” Kaman said, ambushed below the belt by Evans, as the Nuggets scored on a rare clean jumper to cut L.A.’s lead to 30-27. “I felt I got a little violated by another man.”

There are many inventive ways to establish rebound position, but until Evans groped Kaman below the belt under the basket, I thought I had seen every dirty trick in basketball’s book.

Not to suggest the way Evans touched Kaman was risque, but I’m not sure Kim Cattrall ever did a more graphic scene on “Sex and the City.”

Kaman angrily responded by knocking Evans to the floor.

“I think it would have been stupid to swing or throw a punch, so I just kind of shoved him,” Kaman said.

There are not many unwritten rules in sports. Evans, however, broke No. 1: Do not mess with a man’s private business.

“It’s just inappropriate for a basketball game. Or any sport,” Kaman said.

If the Nuggets’ basketball IQ were any lower, somebody would have to water them as plants.

From The Yoo Toob Vaults : Espo, Walton and Butkus On “Wheel Of Fortune”

Posted in Basketball, Gridiron, History's Not Happening, Hockey, The World Of Entertainment at 2:05 pm by

I’m sure I am not alone in thinking it would’ve been the greatest moment in TV history if after being asked by Pat Sajak to name the charity that would receive his “Wheel” winnings, Bill Walton had answered, “THE SYMBIONESE LIBERATION ARMY”.


Introducing David Wright’s New Understudy

Posted in Baseball at 9:04 pm by

Much as I hate to harp on the New York Mets’ financial woes, once again, the club is showing signs they’re unable to assemble a 25 man roster worthy of MLB status.  With all due respect to long-suffering P.R. director Jay Horowitz (left), you’d hope there would be some criteria for David Wright’ backup this spring besides “he’s already on the payroll and we’re running out of parking spaces”.