“Bill Simmons isn’t the first sportswriter to overreach while attempting to use a city’s history as a way to explore the mind-set of its fans,” writes the Boston Globe’s Chad Finn, “but I can’t recall an example as clumsy and inappropriate as one he offered on his ESPN podcast with Jalen Rose Thursday.”
“I didn’t realize the effect [the Martin Luther King assassination] had on that city,’’ Simmons said. “I think from people we talk to and stuff we’ve read, the shooting kind of sets the tone for how the city thinks about stuff.
“We were at Game 3. Great crowd, they fall behind and the whole crowd got tense. It was like, ‘Oh no, something bad is going to happen.’ And it starts from that shooting and it’s just that mind-set they have.”
It’s beyond absurd to connect a culture-altering national tragedy to Game 3 of the NBA Western Conference finals 45 years later.
Simmons continues to do excellent work over a variety of platforms, the podcast usually included. But he might be wise to take a lesson from this and resist any desire to attach cultural meaning to a sporting event in a city that is not particularly familiar to him.
Much as I’m loathe to defend Simmons in most situations, I’m not sure the comparison trivialized King’s death, nor did it elevate a mere sporting event to similar level of import. Simmons is employed, more or less, to sometimes try and capture the mindset of persons other than himself. You could certainly say he’s not spent enough time in Memphis to make such a point, but I don’t think he’s at all out of line in calling the 1968 assassination of MLK a pivotal event that still hangs over a region, if not an entire country, 45 years later.
The caller sounded like an elderly man with a point to make about a “a hitch” in Ike Davis’s swing. Francesa jumped him, cut him off, beat him up. He sarcastically, cruelly claimed that he, Mike Francesa, had no idea Davis is in a slump.
That Francesa’s unwarranted, schoolyard bully mistreatment was lost on the poor man, and that Francesa thought his audience would admire the way he belittled and big-timed this guy just for kicks, made Francesa the heel once again.
Anyone and everyone can be wrong, a lot, too. But Francesa speaks as if he 1) knows all, and 2) is never wrong, when both 1) and 2) are b) completely false. In fact he often is so wrong and so disinclined toward the honesty to acknowledge such, it’s funny! The only one left who takes Francesa seriously is Francesa! - Phil Mushnick, NY Post, May 31, 2013
In Francesa’s defense, some of the questions about Ike Davis aren’t entirely thoughtful.
Offended by criticism that Dennis Rodman’s basketball diplomacy was a marketing gimmick for their season finale on North Korea, the creators of “Vice,” a new HBO newsmagazine with a penchant for daredevilish themes, said Wednesday that Mr. Rodman had improved the program but was not even their first choice.
At a preview screening of the finale, the creators said they would have preferred to have recruited another former N.B.A. star, Michael Jordan, whose autograph adorns a basketball presented to Kim Jong-il, the father of North Korea’s current leader, Kim Jong-un, by Secretary of State Madeleine K. Albright during her visit to North Korea in 2000 — when relations were comparatively warmer than they are now.
“Jordan wasn’t interested,” said Shane Smith, the founder and chief executive of the Vice Media Group, the HBO partner that conceived the North Korea trip and helped persuade the authorities there to permit it.
OK, once again I’m paraphrasing a bit. As you’re probably aware, Washington Redskins owner Daniel Snyder recently responded to the growing call for the club to change their name to, y’know, something less likely to be confused with a racial slur, by insisting the matter was not up for discussion. Ever. Tackling this topic with his usual degree of sophistication, Sirius/XM’s Chris Russo opined Tuesday this was “a non-story”, surmising that if “an Indian school in Arizona” had no problem with their own team being named the Redskins, why should anyone else complain?
Taking a different approach to Synder’s stubbornness, however, was U.S. Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes Norton (DC – D), who in chatting with Luke Russert on MSNBC earlier today, argued, “ I’m not surprised that most Americans don’t see any harm in the word. Most of us have had to be educated by Native Americans, who after all, are only less than two percent of the population. They don’t exactly have a microphone every day. If it were African Americans, you’d know all about it.” From DC Sports Bog’s Dan Steinberg :
“Let me tell you something about (Snyder’s) attitude, because that’s what’s disturbing,” Norton said. “Look, the man inherited the name, so what principle is he standing on? This is the same Dan Snyder that sued a paper here, the City Paper, which wrote an article that was very critical of his management of the Redskins. But the centerpiece of his suit was a photo that he said disparaged him as a Jew. So here is a man who has shown sensibilities based on his own ethnic identity, who refuses to recognize the sensibilities of American Indians….This is not about the First Amendment. This is about branding, whether you can use a brand that disparages an ethnic group. And the fact that the NCAA now bars the use of such names, and that all over America they are being dropped, he has to come forward — it seems to me — with why this ‘never [change]‘ statement amounts to a principle.”
The sheer vanity is nothing short of stunning. It beggars belief the public would be enlisted to help glorify someone with only the thinnest of resumes. But enough about the Mamet Sisters — things aren’t looking so good for the Dino Costa documentary, either see above. There’s no definitive word yet from the film’s producers, the mini-Mirimax known as Chesapeake Films, regarding the doc’s overseas distribution prospects after shopping it around Cannes, but given the spectacular box office failure of 2011′s, “Homme Avec Un Cerveau Minuscule : L’histoire de Scott Wetzel”, this might be an uphill climb.
“What are you asking me to do?” he asked. “Take my belt off and spank them? Yell at them? Scream at them? What do you want? These kids, every day, we go through the process. We’re talking constantly about approach.
“Do we need to make changes? This can’t continue. Somewhere down the road, yeah, we’re going to have to make some changes.”
While the Royals’ (co)-hitting coach Jack Maloof suggests the home venue is a source of frustration (“There is just no reward here (for us) to try and hit home runs,”), Royals Review’s Clark Fosler is unimpressed with that particular excuse (“the same stadium where the opposition has hit 32 home runs to the Royals’ 11. The same stadium that was there last year and the year before and the year before that”)
There is not one of us who didn’t know 10 years ago that Kaufmann was a doubles hitter’s paradise and a home run hitter’s nightmare. Although it should be pointed out that the Royals are just 18th in doubles and, in unrelated news, have grounded into more double plays than all but five other teams in baseball (one of those the Marlins, who may or may not count).
Congratulations, Dayton Moore. Your young lineup doesn’t hit. Your manager is a snippy, condescending public relations disaster and your lead hitting coach just figured out that it is hard to hit home runs in Kaufmann Stadium
As you’ve probably read or seen on the highlight programs, Reds closer Adrolis Chapman threw consecutive pitches in the general vicinity of Nick Swisher’s skull Monday afternoon, an act that struck Swisher, several teammates and Indians broadcaster Tom Hamilton (above) as an unconscionable act of aggression. ““What you’d love to see Swisher do here is to knock it right off the temple of Chapman and see how much fun it is to have a ball coming at your head,” bellowed Hamilton, who in the view of Cleveland Frowns’ Peter Pattakos, went off the deep when saying of Chapman, “maybe you get away with that in Cuba”.
As much as this statement probably falls closer to idiotic jingoism than anything else, there’s at least a chance it was intended as a comment on Cuba as a place where things are so backward that pitchers can throw inside at batters with impunity.
So it’s at least worth pointing out that however backward Cuba is about some things, it’s also a place where child poverty has apparently been pretty much completely eliminated, whereas children in the U.S. suffer from the second-highest poverty rate in the developed world. Additionally, “[a]part from achieving near 100% literacy many years ago, [Cuba's] health statistics are the envy of many far richer countries.” And while the carnage suffered in New Orleans in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina has been contrasted with Cuba’s “extraordinarily effective disaster response.” There’s also that, “the Worldwide Fund for Nature’s 2006 Living Planet report identified Cuba as the only country that achieved high levels of human development while living within its environmental footprint.” All of this while subject to a widely condemned trade embargo by the U.S. that’s been running for 53 years and counting.
I can’t be the only one who’d be interested to hear Hamilton’s thoughts on how these factors impact an analysis of Cuba’s status as a place where people get away with things. Anyway, it was probably the camouflage hats that had him all tuned up.
In that case, an assistant track and field coach said she went to Hermann to complain of what she considered sexist behavior and “discriminatory treatment” by the head coach. Within three weeks of her taking her concerns to Louisville’s human resources department, the assistant coach, Mary Banker, was fired.
In 2008, Banker sued the university’s athletic department, saying that she had been subjected to discriminatory treatment because of her gender. She said that she was ultimately terminated after she voiced her concerns to Hermann and complained to the university’s human resources department, according to the complaint in Kentucky state court.
Among Banker’s concerns: the male coaches would refer to student-athletes with words that were derogatory toward women, and that because she was female she was instructed by the head coach, Ron Mann, to set up party tables and make food arrangements for recruiting lunches.
In a filing with the Supreme Court, Banker’s lawyer Bryan Cassis wrote that after Banker’s complaint to human resources, “Hermann called Banker into her office and flat-out told her, ‘You should not have gone to HR.’ ” The lawsuit also said Hermann told Banker: “I don’t know how I’m going to restore trust in you amongst staff now.”
Casis tells Eder that he’s not been contacted by anyone from Rutgers. Since I have little experience dealing with New Jersey’s premier institutes of higher learning (or, for that matter, Rutgers) it would be terribly unfair of me to say the school is not entirely familiar with the concept of due diligence. But George O’Leary would like it known that he’s totally available anytime the Scarlet Knights say the word.
There is absolutely nothing humorous about the ghastly charges faced by former AWA star Buck “Rock’n'Roll” Zumhofe. But few will argue with me when I state that a person facing such serious allegations will have a very difficult time getting a fair trial as long as photographs like the one above are in wide circulation.
…or maybe he’s just not one for commitment! Vikings RB Adrian Peterson is welcome to all sorts of screwy opinions. If AD happens to believe The Suburbs discography holds up better than that of the Suicide Commandos, I might not agree with him, but I’ll defend his right to say something that ridiculous with my last breath. Or my next to last breath.
The above example, of course, however trivial you might find it, is a matter of taste. Maybe if you’re kinda zealot-like, it’s a matter of belief. But at the end of the day, whoever Peterson picks, it doesn’t impact public policy. It has no impact on anyone else’s civil rights. So with that in mind, here’s AD telling the world that when it comes to same sex marriage, “I’m not with that.” So if you’re a guy that’s been shopping for engagement rings and you were planning on popping the question to Adrian Peterson, man, did you just dodge a bullet. From Shutdown Corner’s Doug Farrar :
Peterson had a lot on his mind during a recent conversation with SIRIUS NFL Radio, and he made some waves with his comments regarding gay marriage, which will become legal in Minnesota on Aug. 1. Peterson said that he doesn’t believe in non-traditional unions.
“To each his own, [but] I’m not with it,” Peterson said. “I have relatives who are gay. I’m not biased towards them. I still treat them the same. I love ‘em. But again, I’m not with that. That’s not something I believe in. But to each his own.”
Peterson was asked about the recent release of former Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, who signed with the Oakland Raiders on May 16. Kluwe has long been an advocate for gay rights, and some seemed to believe that this fact had something to do with his change of scenery.
“I’m not in the [organizational] meetings. I’m sure the Vikings organization didn’t release him based on that,” he said. “They know Kluwe. They’ve been knowing him for a long time. They know he’s outspoken.”
Veteran Austin music scribe Michael Corcoran tackled the subject of local snooze-rock fixture Bob Schneider this weekend, and while the former might’ve intended to praise the latter for his improvisational skills, transition to adulthood or career tenacity, the end result comes off like an indictment that even Schneider’s biggest detractors would struggle to match. Amongst the highlights :
a) “if you’re a hipster and you’re seen at one of my shows, your credibility is shot”
Trying to pin down exactly what Schneider or Corcoran think a hipster is in 2013 could be a pretty scary article all by itself, a reverse Onion if you will. But it’s a curious badge of honor for Schneider (the piece is titled, “Bob’s Burden”, as if anyone should feel bad that Saxon Pub residences have cost him cool points) and the sort of manufactured motivation that Kobe Bryant would find embarrassing. Can the artist or author ID one single “hipster” (or for that matter, a credible person) who has expressed fear of attending a Bob Schneider show, or more to the point, experienced being shunned as the result of doing so? Couldn’t it be more likely that despite being quite popular by regional standards, Schneider is polarizing and many of those who’d sooner guzzle draino than listed to his horrible music are from more than one easily ID’d demographic? Couldn’t it be as simple as hip-or-not, some people just think he sucks?
b) Schneider doesn’t owe his career to Sandra Bullock because he was in loads of terrible projects before and since.
I’m OK with this, actually. But it doesn’t help Corcoran’s case that Bullock’s name is dropped no fewer than 3 times in the article (there’s a picture of her, too). Look, I can totally believe that Bob Schneider didn’t sleep his way to the middle. But it’s kind of grim that someone trying to make a case for him can’t do so without bringing it up.
c) he’s a responsible 46 year old because he turned down a chance to nail “the sexiest, most overserved woman in the joint” (described by Michael Corcoran, as “tonight’s Tara Reid”)
That the author thought this was a noteworthy moment says a little more about him than Schneider. Would it have been more or less noble if Schneider had turned down someone who didn’t remind Corcoran of Tara Reid?
d) Eschewing meet & greets, watching opening bands or hanging around a merch table like some kind of boob, Schneider tends to show up for gigs minutes before taking the stage (“these days he barely says a word to bandmates…because he wants the conversation to happen musically…like a boxer who abstains from sex before a big fight to conserve his savage energy”)
OK, there’s a music journalist living vicariously through Bob Schenider’s cock. That has already been established. That he’d like to characterize, y’know, being an asshole, as some sort of intense- artistic-focus, is not doing the object of his admiration any favors.
Over the years, I’ve tried to maintain a Chinese Wall between Cumbucket Media’s sports division (CSTB) and brutal exploitation of recording artists division (12XU). Not because I am an especially ethical person, but mostly because it is fun to drop expressions like “Chinese Wall” into conversations with people who born sometime in the last half century. How better to create an “you can’t possibly argue with me” vibe to persons complaining no one knows their new record is out than by invoking something that sounds as ominous as “CHINESE WALL”?
In this instance, however, I’ll make an exception. Trustees guitar wiz Mike Melendi has stepped behind the camera to shoot The Gospel Truth performing “Hud” at Austin’s beloved Trailer Space, and it’s a near perfect colison of performance, composition, location and genuinely alarming images of the record store’s ceiling. “Hud” is culled from The Gospel Truth’s forthcoming LP, ‘A Lonely Man Does Foolish Things’ (12XU 054-1), available at finer (ie. slightly cleaner) record shops on June 18, or at your doorstep just prior if you preorder from 12XU.
Spurs PG Tony Parker famously suffered food poisoning from a dodge crème brûlée during the 2003 Western Conference Finals, and as such, the Frenchman is rather wary of dining out in opposing cities. Which makes the accusations of Memphis chef Kelly English somewhat suspicious, with Yahoo’s Marc Spears reporting the former claims Parker was denied a table at Restaurant Iris.
English, a Grizzlies fan who has the team’s “Grit, Grind” slogan written on his arm in his Twitter profile photo, then explained the decision in a subsequent tweet, saying Parker wasn’t given a table at the restaurant because he didn’t have a reservation.
Parker, however, said he ate room service dinner from his hotel while watching the Miami Heat and Indiana Pacers play Game 2 of the Eastern Conference finals that night. Parker said he never even left his hotel room.
“I don’t know what is going on with that, man,” Parker said before the Spurs’ practice on Sunday. “I did not do that. Can you stop doing promos? Is that a new way of doing promos? That’s a new way of doing promotion now, using my name? I did not do that.”
“I stayed in my hotel room, never called or anything,” Parker said. “…I don’t know why you [media] keep fueling that. I guess he’s going to have a lot of people now going to his restaurant because you guys keep talking about it. It’s a great way to promote it with a fake reservation.”
Being attractive can cause almost as many problems for female sports journalists as being unattractive. Spain had barely been reporting two weeks from the Blackhawks locker room in Chicago when a male veteran reporter on the same beat insinuated that she must have been sleeping with one of the players. Another mentioned to the PR department that he found her breasts “a distraction.”
Spain now works in one of the toughest fields for female sports journalists to break into: talk radio. Despite being closeted in a recording booth, her presence reduced to just a voice, she still received tough criticism that her looks got her the job. “I’m on the radio,” she said drily. “You can’t even see me.”
In fact, Spain believes the very thing that most critics find offensive about a female sports journalist on talk radio is that you can’t see her face. “A lot of men are happy to get their sports from women if they’re beautiful and they get to watch them at the same time,” she said.
This is where the sideline reporting jobs—the one spot in sports journalism increasingly reserved for women—come into the picture. “That role is either filled by actual journalists,” said espnW reporter Jane McManus, “or Miss Florida, who is, you know, an attractive young woman.”
While Spain admitted that the atmosphere today is a lot less hostile toward female sports reporters than it used to be, there’s still a struggle to find the right balance between looks and qualifications. “You can’t win either way,” she said. “Either you’re too beautiful and you don’t know what you’re talking about, or you’re too ugly and I don’t want to watch you.”
Sterling continues messing up routine stuff (like the score or where a ball is hit) and Waldman continues cleaning up after him. This produces uncomfortable, sometimes cringe-inducing radio. It also makes it impossible to follow the game.
Sterling doesn’t paint the word picture — he finger paints it.
Still, this is their ninth season together and there’s a segment of Yankee fans that feels Ma and Pa are like family. They don’t care about the rough spots. And when it comes to baseball on the radio, the likability factor is huge. It cannot be manufactured. While it doesn’t drive the ratings, it plays a factor in keeping them healthy.
If we were calling the shots, we would keep them (we readily admit this is also because we dig writing about them).
For Sterling and Waldman, the Yankees factor is key. Despite some of the embarrassing on-air moments, the organization has always stood by them. Does that still hold true? Or as time passes has it already changed?
Perhaps you’re unaware that prior to his long-running stint as host of TV game show “Let’s Make A Deal”, Monty Hall toiled for two seasons as the NY Rangers’ radio analyst on WINS. Or maybe you already knew — and any time you wanna take over the editor’s chair, just say the word, genius. On the eve of Hall receiving a Lifetime Achievement Award at the Daytime Emmys, Newsday’s Neil Best quizzes the former about his more sensational moments in the MSG booth.
Hall recalled a between-periods interview he did with coach Phil Watson early in the 1959-1960 season during which Watson ripped several players, saying of goalie Gump Worsley, “He drinks so much beer he can’t stand in that cage.”
“When the next period started, I noticed he wasn’t behind the bench,” Hall said. “[GM] Muzz Patrick fired him between periods.”
Upon Watson’s death in 1991, Patrick told The New York Times that he had to fire his old roommate and friend not because he was losing but because he “sometimes talks too much.”
Also that season, Hall was working on Nov. 1, 1959, when Jacques Plante of the Canadiens left a game against the Rangers bleeding profusely after being hit by a shot from Andy Bathgate.
Hall correctly predicted during the break while Plante was stitched up that he would return wearing the mask he had worn in warmups. So he did, and the history of goaltending changed forever as “15,000 people jumped up and booed him.”
Describing those who do the bidding of Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel as, “an army of zombie pigs who know how to do nothing but feed”, The Nation’s Dave Zirin takes a dim view of Emanuel’s plans to gift DePaul University with $100 million for a new basketball arena, at the same time Chicago is closing scores of public schools and health clinics. All of this, Zirin points out, “for a non-descript basketball team that has gone 47-111 over the last five years” (“These aren’t the actions of a mayor. They’re the actions of a mad king.”) But hey, at least that Lollapalooza radius clause seems pretty solid.
If you want to understand why Mayor Rahm has approval ratings to rival Rush Limbaugh in Harlem, you can point to priorities like these. The school closures are taking place entirely in communities of color while the city’s elite feed with crazed abandon at an increasingly sapped trough. As Karen Lewis, the Chicago Teachers Union chief who led a victorious strike last September fueled by rage at Mayor Rahm, said, “When the mayor claims he is facing unprecedented budget problems, he has a choice to make. He is choosing between putting our communities first or continuing the practice of handing out millions of public dollars to private operators, even in the toughest of times.”
It’s hardly just the labor-left of Chicago pointing out how breathtakingly heartless these priorities are. Rick Telander, the lead sports columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times, penned a piece subtly titled, “With Rahm’s DePaul plan, we’ve entered a new arena of stupidity.” After making clear that DePaul’s team is hardly a magnet for city hoops fans, Telander wrote, “But forget that. Guess who will have to cough up about $100 million to build the thing for the private Catholic university of 25,000, through bonds and the usual sneak attacks of wallet-siphonage—Yes! Taxpayers! Ta-dah!”
The fact that Rick Telander wrote these words matters. The wine is out of the bottle and the horse is out of the barn. In 2013, it’s no longer a few of us cap-wearing Cassandras shouting that the end is nigh if we keep hollowing city budgets to pay for these monuments to corporate welfare. It’s Rick Telander. It’s the Chicago Sun-Times sports page. It’s all of us.
Love it, love it, for sure! Found this web site about a month ago and love all the comment,s and to know that 19 years after the fact that the Video was shot. People are still wondering what the HELL was COMPLETE trying to do? Well, just what we have done. Look at all of the web site’s and the controversy we have started. I can’t help but love this, you guy’s are all sitting in front of your computer’s, bashing and trashing and I have to smile… Again Complete has been invited for the What, say that again, “The Forth year in a row, to SXSW to showcase in Austin.” Do u have any idea how many signed bands would kill for a spot at this ? Only 2 bands were chosen last year from DFW, that’s Dallas Fort worth for those of you who need a little extra help….. Famous is Famous, no matter how you get there, and I am proud to be known as a part of the world’s most shocking band. EVER !!! We will be playing the Ranch in Arlington Texas on the 13th at 10pm. Please come on out and be your own judge, you know that not everything you read or see is true…. Thank you for letting me be the topic of your grand discussion. The reason I keep on playing is because I love Rock and Roll, I want to bring back what we lost long ago, and if it’s not us let it be someone else. The new music is nothing like what my generation enjoyed. I love to perform and Love to put on a Rocking Show! Even if you don’t enjoy it, I can assure you I am enjoying it enough for everyone… Let me leave you with this one last thought, “ARE YOU LISTENING” ? “YOU CAN KISS MY ASS WHAT” YOU CAN KISS MY ASS WHAT, YOU CAN KISS MY ASS WHAT? CAUSE I DON’T GIVE A DAMN WHAT YOU SAY !!!!!!
Test your knowledge what song does this come from? My fans will know this, God bless you all and have a rocking day !!!!
CURT LOW SINGER,WRITER, GUITARIST OF COMPLETE.
ps.. The positive comments far out weigh the negative one’s, but I am just glad folks seem to wanna talk about us. – Nashville Scene, 3/6/12
The 15-man Memphis roster boasts five lefties: Mike Conley, Tayshaun Prince, Zach Randolph, Ed Davis and Tony Wroten. Head coach Lionel Hollins is a lefty, too. All told, that’s more than the other three teams combined. The Heat have two southpaws (Chris Bosh and Joel Anthony), the Spurs one (Manu Ginobili) and the Pacers none.
In this season’s playoffs, lefties have accounted for 46.1% of all minutes played by Memphis players, the second highest percentage in NBA playoff history behind the 46.2% of the 1969 Philadelphia 76ers, according to an analysis by Basketball Reference. During this season’s playoffs, lefties have accounted for 48.5% of all Memphis field goals attempted, second in NBA playoff history only to the 48.8% of the 1968 New York Knicks, according to Basketball Reference.
Conley Jr. has guided his team to the Western Conference finals with his point-guard play. His scoring and assists numbers are well above his regular-season averages. Randolph has also upped his scoring in the playoffs using both his left and right hands to score in the low post. And Prince’s main contribution in the Oklahoma City series was guarding right-handed star Kevin Durant, who shot just 42% from the field.
The Spaniard was on stage at the European Tour’s gala players’ awards dinner, where he was questioned by the Golf Channel’s Steve Sands. García, who has been embroiled in verbal battles with Woods since the Players Championship at Sawgrass this month, was asked in jest if he would have the American round for dinner one night during the upcoming US Open. “We will have him round every night,” García said. “We will serve fried chicken.”
García left on Tuesday night before he could be asked to clarify his remarks, but later issued a statement through the European Tour, saying: “I apologise for any offence that may have been caused by my comment on stage during The European Tour Players’ Awards dinner. I answered a question that was clearly made towards me as a joke with a silly remark, but in no way was the comment meant in a racist manner.” – Ewan Murray, The Guardian, 5/22/13
Apologizing for “any offense that may have been caused” isn’t exactly accepting accountability — it can also be construed as Garcia merely acknowledging that others were offended. Not that he’s, y’know, individually offensive. Likewise, “in no way was the comment meant in a racist manner.” When you regurgitate an ancient stereotype that’s aimed at one ethnic group in particular, how else should the comment be taken? Whatta maroon.
I look pretty good up there, right? BIG, BIG day for Randy. All sorts of international exposure. And when the world’s media wanted to know what could the greatest sporting franchise of all time bring to the table when it comes to making soccer happen in NYC? It’s pretty fucking simple, isn’t it? Legitimacy. Local expertise. Sizzle. But the most important element of them all is ME.
Let’s face it, these guys from Manchester City wouldn’t know their ass from their elbow when it comes to running a top-flight sports organization, and I’m more than happy to show them how it’s done — for a healthy fee, of course. But there’s no small irony in that Man City competes back home with a crosstown rival whose annual success has routinely overshadowed theirs. Sounds a little familiar, doesn’t it?
And low and behold, guess which father-son entrepreneurial duo — currently leading the New York Mets on a straight path to contraction — find themselves on the outside looking in? FUNNY considering their own lust for a Major League Soccer franchise led them to waste time and money on lobbying to build an Indian casino in Queens. Time, they’ve got plenty of. Money….not so much.
The study in contrasts couldn’t be more stark. While the 27-time World Champion New York Yankees proudly celebrate our legacy — check out the plaque dedicated to Kevin Maas the next time you’re in Monument Park — the Mets are merely a preparatory school that graduates players like Darryl Strawberry, David Cone and Doc Gooden to the big time.
(Did you dig my prep school analogy? In an earlier draft, I suggested that maybe Luis Castillo went to CHOKE ACADEMY. You know, Choate. Choke….alright. I can see I’m wasting amazing material on a bunch of intellectual stiffs).
And I hope my CSTB followers — all two dozen of them — noticed that when it came time to consummate the marriage between the Yankees and a team no one in America gives two shits about another iconic global brand —- yours truly was front and center. Not Hank Steinbrenner. Not Hal Steinbrenner. But ME. While those two are sorting out Daddy issues and recovered memory syndrome nonsense with some $500-an-hour specialist (though not the kind in a leather mask that Sterling was caught with), I am once again, doing the heavy lifting. Making the bold moves that make me every bit as much a paragon of Yankee excellence as Mantle, DiMaggio or Ruth.
Finally, I’ve got a little advice for New York City F.C.’s newest rivals, a team that seems to think there’s something Major League about Harrison, NJ. Thank you for not mentioning us.. In fact, I’d like you to keep our name out of your stinking mouth for as long as possible. But as long as we’re defining our our respective roles, you might wanna consider changing your team colors to orange and blue.