“Wrap your mouth around a tail pipe until you pass out,” a third person suggested.
Most of the things these people posted online for all the world to see are of course protected by the First Amendment of the United States Constitution, but you have to wonder if somewhere along the way we’ve lost a small piece of common decency toward one another.
I personally didn’t take any of these comments very seriously but there are too many young people out there who are victims of this type of cyber bullying who can’t just brush it off.
After a 3-13 season and rumored friction between his employer and franchise QB, there’s nothing surprising about Monday’s dismissal of Washington head coach Mike Shanahan. Even so, the behavior of Daniel Snyder’s staff during Shanahan’s farewell press conference makes the public relations tactics of James Dolan seem entirely reasonable by comparison. Or at least slightly less batshit insane. From the Washington Post’s Kent Babb :
Reporters weren’t allowed to stand in the parking lot between the media building and the team facility after Snyder and Shanahan arrived. The team assigned two public-relations interns to patrol the area, assigning them walkie-talkies and instructions to keep doors and window shades closed. Reporters therefore watched and shot video through uncovered windows and slits between curtain and sill, and when one of the shades came detached from a doorway, a team employee tried to reattach it with several strips of Scotch tape.
As GM Bruce Allen’s press conference was winding down, a television reporter with a history of asking confrontational questions raised his hand and was handed a microphone, at which point communications director Tony Wyllie signaled to end the meeting. The reporter, WUSA-TV’s Dave Owens, waved off the team employee trying to retrieve the microphone; Wyllie then walked over and, after a brief tug of war, pulled the microphone from Owens’s hand.
As Mike Shanahan prepared to leave, his Audi was moved to a curb near a side exit. Security guards patrolled the lot like Secret Service agents, presumably to prevent a reporters’ rush on Shanahan’s car — though, after his news conference, there was little interest in such an advance. As the guards waited, their eyes scanning the mostly empty lot, a team employee said the situation was no longer a PR issue; it was rather a security measure.
Rodriguez: Randy, […] As you can imagine, I’m feeling left out, I can’t be with the team at spring training and this leaves an empty hole in my life. And on top of that I’m dealing with the backlash of all these ugly rumors and false stories. […] Of course I am very concerned about these rumors and about what the team is doing and saying about me. … People have been telling me that you have an 8% bounty on my contract.[…] Maybe all of this is coming from my cousin […], who knows. He claims he met with the Yankees and that you are after me and it has me concerned. I hope this [e-mail] is the start of us clearing the air between us. I don’t want us to be enemies. I am loyal to the team. I only want the best for the Yankees organization. But I do need reassurance from you and I need to know what is going on. It is bad business for everyone.
Levine: First off, neither I nor anyone at Yankees every met with your cousin. This is being handled by MLB and we r allowing them to do their job. There is no bounty on you. We have no idea who MLB is meeting with or what course their investigation is taking. It is entirely in their hands. We r not talking to the media on this issue, we have said this is being handled by MLB, and we will have no comment until the investigation is over. That’s it. There is nothing else going on. I wish u health and a good rehab.
On Friday, Cleveland suspended C Andrew Bynum (above, right) indefinitely for “conduct detrimental to the team”, though a similar punishment could well be levied upon GM Chris Grant (above, left) , who signed Bynum to a two year, $24 million pact last summer. The Cleveland Plain-Dealer’s Mary Schmitt-Boyer alludes to “a pattern of behavior from Bynum and whether (Bynum) was fully committed to basketball”, along with digging up a quote from earlier this season in which the former Laker/Sixer hints his knee troubles have him contemplating retirement (“My knees are my knees. They’re not going to get better, they are what they are. That’s really it. … I feel like I can still be a double-double guy in this league, but it’s just going to take some modifications to my game and whether or not I want to accept the challenge and do that,”). Yahoo’s Adrian Wojnarowski claims the Cavaliers, “have no intention of Bynum ever playing another game for them,” though it seems the feeling’s mutual.
“He doesn’t want to play basketball anymore,” a league source told Yahoo Sports.
The Cavaliers believe Bynum has been a “disruptive” presence within the team and have lost hope the partnership can be salvaged, sources said. Bynum often expressed a lack of desire to play and practice and was convinced by the Cavaliers not to quit previously, sources said.
Other teams that met with Bynum during his free agency last offseason were concerned about his desire to play and commitment to continue the rehab needed for him to play in the NBA after repeated knee problems, sources said.
“We have signed an agreement which defines the investment and management rights in accordance to the club’s statute and legislation that is in force in Bosnia,” Sarajevo general director Dino Selimovic told Reuters.
Selimovic declined to provide details on investment but local media reported on Wednesday that the Malaysian billionaire has pledged to invest 3 million Bosnian marka £1.28m). Sarajevo, established in 1946, has faced bankruptcy over millions of marka in accumulated debt.
Tan, who has been in talks with the club’s managers since last summer, wanted them to draft a plan of the debt restructuring and a three-year investment plan, Sarajevo vice president Edis Kusturica told the Nezavisne Novine daily.
Under the deal, Cardiff will cooperate with Sarajevo, exchanging players and taking part in a football academy, yet to be established, which Tan has said would lure new talents.
Not content with letting James Dolan guarantee victories, Knicks head coach Mike Woodson — confidence unshaken by Wednesday’s ‘Melo-free capitulation to Oklahoma City — tells the New York Post’s Mark Berman he believes his 9-19 club will win the Atlantic Division. This season. Without the other teams being abducted by aliens.
“Do I see some light at the end of the tunnel? I do,” Woodson said. “I think eventually we’ll get where we need to get, based on our last 12 games. Eventually we’ll get healthy and we’ll see how it all plays out.”
“The beauty of all this is nobody’s running away with it in [the Atlantic] division,” Woodson said. “I’m pushing our team to win our division still. We won it last year. I expect us to win it this year.’’
J.R. Smith said the club is not “executing’’ the defensive game plan and realizes the loss to the Thunder made Woodson look lousy.
“Whoever is in that head seat, we have to pay attention to and listen to him and got to know he wants the best for us,’’ Smith said. “When we play like we did [Wednesday], it doesn’t look like that.’’
As you may or may not have read elsewhere, Daniel Johnson’s venerable “Hi, How Are You?” mural —commonly recognized from the cassette and subsequent album of the same name (and years later on a t-shirt widely popularized by Kurt Cobain) was defaced Christmas Eve by a woman who told Austin police the wall art, “was offensive and meant to personally insult her”.
While some of my fellow residents have made a number of rude remarks towards the accused vandal, I’m totally feeling her. Every year when I see the list of bands confirmed to play the Austin Psych Fest, I find it offensive and personally insulting.
The building’s current owners, Thai How Are You (formerly Thai Spice), renamed their establishment after Johnston’s mural earlier this year. It’s estimated it will cost nearly $1,000.00 to remove the spray-painted “FUCK”‘s from the mural, though surely some of the area’s more beloved local residents (Lance Armstrong, Michael Corcoran, Tobey Maguire, Cedric Benson, etc.) will scrape up whatever they can find in the seat cushions of their respective couches.
Having passed on David Carr, Jeff George, Jim Plunkett and Y.A. Title as insurance against Kyle Orton getting hurt (or sucking) during Sunday’s winner-take-all (well, the NFC East) clash with Philadelphia, the Cowboys today signed 16 year NFL vet Jon Kitna. Whether the former Dallas backup will do more than hold a clipboard in 3 days time is unclear, but this October 31, 2007 CSTB item (“Detroit’s Kitna : Funnier Than Linklater’s ‘Fast Food Nation’”) reveals a QB that if nothing else, was a stickler for details.
Lions quarterback Jon Kitna said his choice to dress up at a Halloween party like assistant coach Joe Cullen was intended as a good-natured send up and part of the ribbing that is common in NFL locker rooms.
Kitna, a notorious prankster, said he merely was trying to win a costume contest at charity party in Plymouth held by receiver Mike Furrey on Monday. Kitna came dressed in a naked costume as Cullen, who was arrested and charged in the summer of 2006 with obscene conduct and drunken driving in separate incidents in Dearborn.
“People who understand an NFL locker room understand that when guys do things we joke with each other a lot,” Kitna said. “Now, would I have done it last year? No. I think it would have been too close to when the situation happened.”
Monarrez’ killjoy colleague Drew Sharp, though hardly amused (“Kitna crossed the line this time and owes Cullen an apology, if for nothing else but for pushing that embarrassing evening back to the forefront of local consciousness”) is quick to point out the Lions have a history of hot Halloween getups.
Scott Mitchell made headlines 10 years ago when he appeared at a team party masquerading as Wayne Fontes. Mitchell was in full Big Buck regalia. He had a cigar protruding from his mouth as well as some padded girth protruding from his belt. The coup de grace was the Mickey Mouse ears.
On a day Howard Megdal raises the very strong probability of Kevin Burkhardt leaving SNY for the full time employ of Fox Sports, SNY might take a long look at the progress of another broadcasting hopeful, namely troubled ex-Yankee Jim Leyritz (above). Tapped to host a sports yack program for Southern California’s KLAA — property of Angels owner Artie Moreno — Leyritz’ hire seems curious to the LA Times’ Mike Di Giovanni given the Angels, “lost promising young pitcher Nick Adenhart to a drunk-driving accident in 2009.”
“(Leyritz’ DUI manslaughter acquittal) was in the past—he’s dealt with it, he’s open about it, and I’ll leave it at that,” KLAA program director Bob Agnew said. “We hired Jim based on his broadcast and baseball experience. He had an issue he has not hidden from. It’s not something to go backwards on. He has to live with what’s happened in the past.”
Leyritz, who retired after the 2000 season, previously co-hosted a show on MLB Network Radio and was a regular contributor to the “Michael Kay Show” on the New York City ESPN radio affiliate.
In his new position, Leyritz will team with KLAA’s Jason Brennan on a two-hour show called “Inside the Game.” It will air Monday through Friday from 1 to 3 p.m., beginning Jan. 6, and will cover all Southern California sports.
“After 10 years of radio and TV on the East Coast, I am excited to become part of Angels Radio AM 830,” Leyritz said in a press release. “Moving to Southern California three years ago, this is the opportunity I’ve been waiting for. I hope to bring special insights and interviews with important figures from inside and outside the world of sports.”
Congrats to anyone who wagered Leyritz would have a radio gig lined up for 2014 and Dino Costa wouldn’t.
If you’re thinking it would take a highly unusual NHL highlight to make it to CSTB on Xmas eve without featuring a deliberate-attempt-to-injure, a lengthy fight or a xenophobic remark from Don Cherry….well, guilty as charged. When the day began, Buffalo D Mark Pysyk was plying his trade for Rochester of the AHL. By the end of Monday night, not only had Pysyk’s improbable OT goal secured a 2-1 victory for the Sabres over the Coyotes, but he’s ensured a role in what ought to be one of the most replayed hockey highlights of all time. Until the next time a goalie gets a puck stuck in his pants, anyway.
Considering the grim road ahead and unfair burden shouldered by Bulls PG Derrick Rose, Sports On Earth’s Tomas Rios has harsh words for Chicago’s “incompetent medical staff” and head coach Tom Thibodeau’s “borderline sadistic player management policies”. Rios’ most pointed criticisms, however, are spared for WSCR’s Dan Bernstein and Bulls owner Jerry Reinsdorf.
Gone for yet another season due to his existentially string-cheese knees, Rose, 25, is now fair-game for huckster columnists looking to play the Black Guy Is Not Humble game. Beyond an imagined humility deficiency, Dan Bernstein’s burning strawman fallacy takes cheap hits on Rose’s intelligence, diction, maturity and greed. We’ve heard this bit from white columnists criticizing black athletes more times than anyone could ever count. The impetus for this rhetorical bounty came about due to rumors that Rose is concerned about the team’s direction, which explains why Bernstein’s critiques focus on perception rather than fact. Here’s the uncomfortable truth: Rose should want out of Chicago.
Playing for a team owned by Jerry Reinsdorf isn’t helping any. Last season, the Bulls paid the luxury tax for the first time in franchise history and only did so because Rose’s torn ACL made signing Kirk Hinrich a necessity. This despite the team recently posting a five-year average annual profit of $55 million that makes them by far the league’s most profitable franchise.
While Reinsdorf has repeatedly said that he would be willing to pay the luxury tax for a “winner,” this is in direct contradiction to the fact that the team’s marquee free-agent signing in the Rose era was Carlos Boozer’s five-year, $80 million albatross of a contract. That deal that has served mostly to hamper Taj Gibson’s development. Gibson is posting better per-36 numbers than Boozer this season and is far better suited to the Bulls’ style of play. More importantly, the Bulls were gifted a franchise player in Rose and have failed to acquire or develop a secondary scorer capable of complementing him. Reinsdorf demanding a “winner” as a condition to paying the luxury tax is simply a convenient PR device meant to distract from the fact that paying the luxury tax is now all but a precondition to winning a title. It’s Reinsdorf’s money to spend as he sees fit, but his choices have consequences. For example, a presumptive franchise player being leery about a bargain-basement rebuilding project.
“Whenever I look at TV and I see the weapon I invented to defend my motherland in the hands of these bin Ladens I ask myself the same question: How did it get into their hands?” the 86-year-old Russian gun maker (above) said.
“I didn’t put it in the hands of bandits and terrorists and it’s not my fault that it has mushroomed uncontrollably across the globe. Can I be blamed that they consider it the most reliable weapon?” he said.
The question is especially acute as an 11-day U.N. conference on curbing the small-arms trade convenes June 26 in New York. Kalashnikov is thinking of sending the delegates a statement.
Sturdy, simple and cheap, firing 600 bullets a minute, the world’s estimated 100 million Kalashnikovs account for up to 80 percent of all assault rifles. In Africa’s civil conflicts or in violence-ridden Latin American nations, it sells for as little as $15.
Kalashnikov, despite his advanced age, is still chief designer of the state-controlled company.
He says he never made a kopeck in royalties because his invention was never patented.
“At that time, patenting inventions wasn’t an issue in our country. We worked for socialist society, for the good of the people, which I never regret,” he said.
Meyer, regrettably, doesn’t solicit an opinion from Kalashnikov about the unique social views of Mrs. AK-47, but I do understand that real reporters are very pressed for time.
(Pygmy Shrews at 285 Kent, February 2012. Not shown : Beyonce)
Of the rumored closing of Williamsburg music space 285 Kent, some of the pithier Brooklyn Vegan comments included such bon mots a “good riddance to this mold-infused, carcinogenic fire-hazard deathtrap,” “has a woman ever been spotted at that sausage fest club?” and “the only people sad about this closing are the ones who moved to New York in 2011.”
So it should go without saying that I kinda liked the place and usually had a good time there (though keep in mind, I was grading it on a scale that included other mold-infused, carcinogenic fire-hazard deathtraps mostly populated by unhappy looking dudes). Still, I’ve not previously considered that keeping 285 Kent —- or any other Brooklyn venue — open should be the responsibility of wealthy megastars (who may or may not have other charitable endeavors on their minds). And with that in mind, here’s a Change.org petition putting the fate of 285 Kent squarely in the hands of Jay-Z and Beyonce.
Jay Z and Beyonce should donate at least $1 million to pay the curators of the venue to stay open because god damn this place ruled. We can call it Club Roc Nation, no one is arguing against that. If Dame Dash can have a weird underground venue in Manhattan, there’s no reason Hov and Bey shouldn’t step in to retain this amazing space for cultural posterity. When 285 Kent reopens, Grimes should play a week-long residency during which Todd P has to do pushups the entire time sound is happening.
Peering up from his stall and peeping Noah’s 6-foot-10 frame standing at the entrance, Perkins immediately voiced his displeasure. “They just let anybody in the locker room,” Perkins shouted, drawing the attention of everyone standing around waiting on players to dress before getting interviewed. “C’mon, man,” Noah responded. Perkins, looking around for support from his teammates and soon reeling in Russell Westbrook, repeated his statement. Noah asked Perkins if he wanted him outside. Perkins responded “I’m just saying, though.” Noah then said “If you want me to wait outside, I’ll wait outside.” Perkins then said “Get yo’ (expletive) up out of here, (expletive).” “Aight,” Noah responded.
A couple of crazy, random things happened to me leading up to the exchange. First, I was headed into the Bulls locker room to try to grab Kirk Hinrich when Hasheem Thabeet, standing just outside the locker room, asked me to get Taj Gibson for him. I told Hasheem to just walk in and get him himself. Thabeet responded by giving me a sour face, like he had just eaten rotten eggs. Apparently, it was an awful suggestion. But his request was awkward for me because I don’t know Taj Gibson. Only talked to him once. That was in the preseason matchup. Besides, dudes are half dressed in these settings, and it just felt wrong for a man to walk up to another man, a half dressed one that he doesn’t know mind you and tell him that another man is waiting on him outside. Weird. But Gibson was totally cool about it. He asked me why doesn’t he just come in. “That’s what I said,”I told Gibson. “Thabo does it all the time,” Gibson responded before getting up and going out to meet Thabeet.
It’s a fun idea, sure, but if Keijo Haino isn’t afforded the opportunity to be photoshopped into incongruous scenarios, why does Merzbow have it so cushy?. From Tabsout.com :
Click the image to the left to download a high res PSD (or here if you’d rather grip a PNG or JPG) of Masami Akita. Once the file is living on your computer, use the program Adobe Photoshop (or an equivalent) to render old Merzy, or place him somewhere zany like a KFC or something. Go crazy. Have fun. Be a dick. We’ll choose our favorites and throw em up on the site. Whoever makes the best ones will get a grip of cassette tapes from us as a little prize.
Second prize is presumably two grips of cassette tapes.
(EDITOR’S NOTE : On Thursday, former Screw publisher / NYC icon Al Goldstein shuffled off this mortal coil at the age of 77. Between his stewardship of Screw and the Manhattan Cable fixture, “Midnight Blue”, Al upped the ante in the Sexual Revolution in a manner that was equal parts absurd, anarchic, hilarious…and hilariously self-indulgent. It’s very hard to imagine the mainstream success of say, Howard Stern or Vice’s global empire, where it not for ground broken — and then paved over —- by Goldstein long before weekly papers coveted his classified ad revenues. It’s also hard to imagine a consumer advocate like Randy L. getting any respect where it not for Al’s pioneering path, but perhaps that’s not necessarily a good thing.
After a weekend arguing with my Dad over the respective merits of the Democratic party’s remaining challengers, I had thought about posting Al Goldstein’s latest campaign video, but changed my mind after watching an older clip from Al’s salad days. Never mind Seinfeld spitting out mutton, this has to be the finest publicity the Old Homestead ever received.
What’s English for, “it was a stupid decision, but talk about convenient scapegoats?” If you think the Knicks pulling it out in the 2nd OT against Milwaukee mitigates the damage, Ball Don’t Lie’s Dan Devine argues, “the big deal is that after Bargnani committed one of the most amazingly ridiculous plays you’re ever going to see in an NBA game — a game that saw J.R. Smith go 5 for 17 from 3-point land alone — Knicks head coach Mike Woodson kept Bargnani on the floor to start the second overtime.”
The big deal is that a Knicks team without four rotation players and that is bad even WITH those guys doesn’t need to make it easier for other teams to beat them, and yet here they were doing it, courtesy of a guy for whom they traded a 2016 first-round pick and two second-round picks. Bargnani, Smith, Anthony, Woodson, the utterly lost Iman Shumpert … the Knicks are basically playing basketball like they are kidding at this point.
Though many of you might not know the name of Bay Area musician/producer/engineer/label owner Tom Mallon-McCorgray, if you’ve been a fan of the region nation’s better underground music of the past quarter century, his name has almost certainly figured in some of your favorite recordings. Tom’s Grifter Records was the original home of American Music Club and Flying Color, he recorded and played (at various stages) drums and bass for the former, drums for Toiling Midgets and for a spell, bass in a super late version of Negative Trend. His production & engineering credits cover an incredible amount of musical ground, from Crucifix to Cynthia Dall, from Thin White Rope to the Zip Code Rapists.
There’s a effort to raise funds for Tom’s continued hospice expenses and you can make a donation here. Whether you’re a longtime friend, a band who benefited from his work or simply someone like me — who got so much out of his recordings and performances in a variety of scenarios, please consider giving Tom and family your support.
(EDITOR’S NOTE : From time to time, noted baseball executive / consumer rights advocate Randy L. of the Bronx provides CSTB readers with his observations on the events of the day, sporting and otherwise. Upon reading in today’s Page 6 that “a number of publishers” are offering Alex Rodriguez $5 million or more for the rights to a sensational, tell-all autobiography, Randy offered, no, he fucking demanded to have his say – GC)
So it’s come to this. Bad enough the Yankee uniform has been tarnished by such pseudo authors as Jim Bouton, Joe Pepitone and Jim Leyritz, but now we have to suffer news accounts of the fraud-of-the-century, Alex Rodriguez, having his ego stroked by the auteur behind something called “Cocaine Cowboys”. If Mr. Steinbrenner were alive today, I’m pretty certain he’d beg me to put a pillow over his face. Actually, he really did beg me to put a pillow over his face, but that was after Waldman popped out of the cake at his 78th birthday party.
Perhaps some of you ghoulish types find some entertainment value in A-Rod betraying the confidence of his teammates, coaches, and nutritional consultants alike. Not me. I still believe in the baseball saying, “what happens in a nightclub primarily populated by hostesses who make Luna Vachon look like Kim Novak stays in a nightclub primarily populated by hostesses who make make Luna Vachon look like Kim Novak.” CALL ME OLD SCHOOL.
It’s occurred to me on more than one occasion that rather than attempt to titillate, perhaps today’s reader would rather be regaled by the exploits of a humanitarian, a brilliant executive, a friend to labradors and someone who at the end of the day enjoys the music of The National and the high-wire comedy of Daniel Tosh. But you’re not likely to read a book like that anytime soon, let alone see it adapted into a motion picture directed by Peter Berg, for two simple reasons. For starters, I’m way too modest. But I’ve also got far too much respect for the Yankee Universe to prostitute myself by selling my amazing life story for a mere $5 million dollars.
For $5 million and a $100 donation to this organization, however, I’m willing to consider it.