11.19.08
Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 10:17 pm
by GC
Pedro Martinez all but lobbying for a new Mets contract is a slightly depressing proposition ; it’s unlikely the talismanic pitcher will return to Flushing, his dominant performances in ‘05 and the first half of ‘06 being a very distant memory compared to the past couple of injury plagued campaigns. “Four years wasn’t too much to give Pedro. Two, it seems, was pushing it” scolds NY Magazine’s self-proclaimed lifelong Cardinals fans Will Leitch.
“Conventional wisdom still says that the trade was crucial because it “legitimized” the Mets, making the team seem more serious and attractive to free agents. Here’s a more logical theory: The reason free agents came to Shea was because the Mets offered more money than anybody else. Every big-timer the Mets scooped up — Carlos Beltran (2005), Billy Wagner and Carlos Delgado (2006), Johan Santana and Luis Castillo (2008) — were showered with cash. 2007, when they brought in no free agents, was the year they were outbid for Daisuke Matsuzaka and Barry Zito.
And about the wisdom of all these signings: Pedro’s early “success” fooled the Mets into thinking big-name players were all it took to become champions. (Or become the Yankees — whatever.) Thus: Beltran, solid; Wagner, destroyed by injuries; Delgado, initially effective and then a mess until the second half of last season; Santana, outstanding — for now, just like Pedro in his first season — and with five more years to go; and Castillo, horrific, and with three more years to go. The team spent a ton of money with no World Series to show for it. Once those contracts end, odds are that the Mets will breathe the same sighs of relief that they are now with Pedro leaving.
Not for the first time, Leitch’s take on the New York sporting scene seems utterly confused. The “trade” Will refers to was in fact, Martinez signing with the Mets as a free agent after fulfilling his contractual obligations to Boston. Of the “big-timers the Mets scooped up”, Johan Santana and Luis Castillo were each acquired via trades. And while Omar Minaya failed to land Barry Zito….are we to believe that was a bad thing?
Leitch is correct in stating there’s no worthwhile silverware in the Wilpon trophy cabinet to show for all their largesse, but signing Martinez was a viable way to show Beltran (just slightly better than “solid” during his Mets tenure, assuming you’ve actually seen him play), if not a depressed fanbase, the club was serious about contending (at least according to New York Magazine). There’s also the matter of the money-spinning SNY and the construction of Citi Field, neither of which might’ve come to fruition without Pedro’s arrival, but I’m willing to let that slide. Will’s done some amazing things in his time, but making Omar Minaya seem like a sympathetic figure in November of 2009 has to be on the top of the pile.
Permalink
09.29.08
Posted in New York, New York, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 7:47 pm
by GC
As part of New York Magazine’s 40th Anniversary, a number of NYC sports-thinker types of considerable repute were asked to select their Top Ten New York Athletes of the past four decades. Along with expert testimony from the likes of Mike Lupica and Christopher Russo, another Big Apple fixture, former Deadspin editor Will Leitch — when you think of Gotham, you think of Will — contributed the following :
1. Reggie Jackson
In his first game back in the Bronx after he signed with the Angels, Yankee Stadium chanted his name. They wouldn’t even do that for Jeter.
Really? If Darryl Strawberry, Patrick Ewing and Mark Messier all received standing ovations the first time they returned to New York in a different uniform, why is it so hard to believe a 4 time World Champ like Jeter wouldn’t receive similar treatment?
2. Lawrence Taylor
Dominating, gruesome, monstrous, awesome, and would have been even better if he weren’t high so often. That he was makes him even more of a terrifying, otherworldly force of nightmares.
We’ve already established that Will has some issues with black people, but with all due respect to L.T.’s defensive prowess, it’s kinda fucked up to describe him as “gruesome, monstrous” without acknowledging he might’ve been pretty sharp, too. Did Mark Gastineau have the presence of mind to send hookers to opponents’ hotel rooms?
7. Dwight Gooden
Hard to separate him from Darryl Strawberry; they were the only two people who could make you forget anyone played baseball in the Bronx.
Actually, Will, Straw and Dr. K were very easy to separate. For instance, one played right field and hit monstrous (whoops) home runs, the other was the most exciting young pitcher since Mark Fidyrch or Fernando Valenzuela. “The only two people who could make you forget anyone played baseball in the Bronx?” For the first time, someone has the guts to claim Fritz Peterson’s star power overshadowed Tom Seaver.
10. Pelé
When he entered Studio 54, the place actually went quiet with awe.
The same could be said of Lillian Carter. When she wasn’t wearing panties, anyway. But I’ve got to stand up for Leitch’s credibility on this one. He’s not old enough to have attended the original Studio 54, and while I’m not either, I’m certain a past-his-prime Pele being recognized in a nightclub is a far greater testament to his iconic status than any of his accomplishments on the soccer pitch. Had I been asked to compile such a top ten, Anthony Mason would’ve ranked high simply because someone told me he tipped well at the China Club.
Permalink
09.17.08
Posted in Baseball, We Aren't The World, Will Leitch Sucks
at 7:06 pm
by GC
(Cronenberg : came to WEEI.com for the Whiner Line samples, stayed for the slurs on his homeland)
A : They don’t seem to register on the somewhat faulty cultural radar of former Deadspin editor Will Leitch, who in lauding Jason Bay for WEEI.com insists the unheralded (?) Red Sox left-fielder, “is such a perfect fit with Canada that if he hadn’t been born there, I’d insist he emigrate.”
Canada is the country we always forget about. It sits up there, freaking huge, but really doesn’t register much. The most famous Canadians are all famous because of America. (I doubt Michael J. Fox would have become a hero had Family Ties aired on the CBC.) Canada is modest, quiet, and strangely effective in terms of government’s assistance to its citizens; a guy who breaks his arm in Canada is gonna have a helluva lot easier time than I will, if I break my arm. (He will also cry less.) Canada does great things. But no one really notices.
Jason Bay has been one of baseball’s best players for five years now, but he has done so for a team that is perpetually in last place, in a city with a beautiful stadium but no actual fans. For a guy who once had Eddie Vedder encouraging fans to vote him into the All-Star Game, the odds that you ever gave Jason Bay much thought before he was traded here are minimal. And now, here he is, a linchpin of a team I still think is the favorite to win the World Series this year.
How will he do under the klieg lights of October? Canada’s record is spotty. The biggest Summer Olympics moment they’ve ever had involved Ben Johnson. Hardly anyone watches the NHL anymore. Right now the country’s legislature is in full turmoil. They didn’t make it out of the first round of the World Baseball Classic, despite Bay and Stubby Clapp. Heck, Sarah Palin has even stole their accent.
CSTB’s vast Canadian readership is more than capable of defending herself. I mean, themselves. But suffice to say the next time our Will is paired with another excitable sort for a television chat, I’d like the dance partner to be Don Cherry rather than Buzz Bissenger.
Permalink
09.09.08
Posted in Internal Affairs, Will Leitch Sucks
at 4:27 pm
by Jason Cohen
(The cat, four weeks ago, showing little interest in the Phillies game)
Permalink
06.24.08
Posted in Blogged Down, Internal Affairs, Will Leitch Sucks
at 7:05 pm
by GC
The Will Leitch Farewell Tour of Deadspin continued today with a longish post attempting to put my somewhat over the top attempts at antagonizing Will into some greater perspective.
Though admitting he once considered CSTB, “one of our favorites, though, and the one that seemed to have the best idea of how to run a general interest sports site” (keep in mind this was 2003, folks), Leitch also includes the caveat, “most of it was just long cutting-and-pastings of AP stories with a one-sentence ‘comment’ on the end.” So in other words, a mere parasite like me oughta have greater respect for someone who adds a two-sentence ‘comment’ to the end of stories cut and pasted from ESPN.com.
At the risk of C&P’ing far too much of Leitch’s self-described plucky midwesterisms, I’ll summarize the post in question. Outta the blue, mild-mannered Man From Mattoon was bulldozed by an invisible grouch who proceeded to publish his cell phone number and encouraged the homeless to use his fiancee’s portrait for target practice. Though these missives were distasteful and oh-so-unprovoked, they ultimately help Young Will to buck up, grow-a-pair…and eventually blossom into the fragile butterfly we all saw torn to fucking shreds on HBO.
You’re welcome, Will. Anytime. But the following points need to be made :
1) The CSTB category “Will Leitch Sucks” did not appear “within 25 minutes” of Deadspin’s public launch. Said category was created weeks after the fact, though for the purposes of proper indexing, old posts relevant to the matter at handed were edited to include the category.
2) It is true I posted Will’s phone number, but I only did so after some moron at CBS Sportsline sent a press release that included it. There’s a breach in Leitch’s personal security and he wants to blame the whistleblower?
3) re : the bit about encouraging the homeless to get busy with pics of Will’s ex. Not cool (dude). Hardly my proudest moment — especially the part where I had to pay the homeless to do it. This was a reprehensible act and I don’t think I will ever fully live down the way I exploited…the nation’s less fortunate!
(seriously folks, did it ever occur to Will or his dipshit loyal readers that constantly mocking him was not entirely different from targeting, say, Stephen A. Smith or Chris Berman, neither of whom, to my knowledge, have ever met Will Leitch or done anything to personally hurt him? Or that this long-running schtick is someone’s idea of humor? That if Will were to disappear I’d have to go back to making fun of Mushnick’s beard everyday?)
4) “It can be difficult for the blog uninitiated — which we most definitely were — when they are being hammered online, but, thanks to CSTB, we grew used to it pretty quick. Heck, no one was gonna say anything worse than what he was saying.”
Not until recently, no.
5) The revisionist history is all well and good for lazy types who never bothered to notice how the majority of anti-Leitch posts at CSTB were not in fact, sneak attacks mounted as part of some bloggy traffic war, but directly referenced Deadspin’s real content and totally legit questions about such.
6) Good luck at New York, Will. Hopefully, the magazine won’t “focus too much on New York City for our tastes” and you’ll last more then two days at your new gig before someone compares you to Jm J. Bullock.
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04.03.08
Posted in Baseball, Get Out Of Jail, Mob Behavior, Ugly New Stadiums, Will Leitch Sucks
at 10:51 am
by Ben Schwartz
(Cardinals Mgr Tony La Russa, pictured, not worried about falling attendance. Says La Russa: “Maybe you oughta worry about it, my friend.”)
It’s no mystery why to this Cub fan, but Cardinal management is just waking up to falling ‘2008 ‘Tard attendance. As Sports Illustrated’s direct access to the AP wire reveals:
“We’ve still sold 3 million tickets, haven’t we?” La Russa said. “The fans are supporting us.”
The team had 161 sellouts the first two seasons at the new park, missing one game in 2006 due to a rainout with the Giants that was not made up, and also sold out the last three games of the final year at old Busch Stadium in 2005.
Wednesday’s attendance was about 4,000 shy of the stadium capacity of 43,975.
The end of the streak coincides with reduced expectations for the Cardinals, who have made the postseason seven of the last nine years. Longtime stars Jim Edmonds, Scott Rolen and David Eckstein have departed since the end of last season and top pitchers Chris Carpenter and Mark Mulder began the year on the 15-day disabled list while recovering from surgery.
General manager John Mozeliak said poor weather and a depressed economy also have something to do with it.
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02.18.08
Posted in Blogged Down, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 10:25 am
by GC
(aftermath of a prior generation’s Congressional hearing on PED use in athletics)
Asked by SI.com’s Richard Dietsch “why has Deadspin gained cultural currency?”, the ever-humble Will Leitch replies, “I don’t think it is because of my brilliance. I think I was just fortunate enough to have gotten there first.” And while I’m busying penning Leitch a thank-you note for inventing the internet, blogging and blogging about sports, you might enjoy the following excerpts from Dietsch’s interview.
SI.com: Do you consider yourself a journalist?
Leitch:I consider what I do on Deadspin to be based in the foundations of journalism, yes, based on the foundations of journalism that I have been trained and that I certainly use when I write for GQ, The New York Times and so on. Certainly, I think the language can be a little looser on the web, but I am held to the same standards and accuracy everyone else is. If I am wrong, and if I am constantly throwing stuff up on the site that is wrong, trust me, people are more than happy to let me know how wrong I am. And if I do that consistently they will stop coming to the site. That is the key thing. If I have no credibility, people will stop coming to the site. People are not stupid. And, frankly, with the other places I write for, if I had a reputation for using very lax journalistic principles, I doubt some of these places would want me to work for them.
SI.com: Would you print a photo of a beheaded athlete?
Leitch: To be honest, it depends on the circumstances. I suppose if I found an athlete from 30 years ago, uh, gross, no. I think that would be a question SI.com would have as well. And there would be discretion where I would say, after the jump, if what you really want to do is look, here it is.
SI.com: If Sports Illustrated had photos of Will Leitch drunk, should we post that on SI.com?
Leitch: Well, I don’t know if that would sell that much on your site. But it would be hypocritical of me to be upset about that, and they are already on the Web anyway. It’s not hard to find. Certainly, I’m not sure you would find much success posting them, but you have every right to that.
Indeed, there’s not much cultural currency to be gained in running tipsy party snapshots of Will. Photos of him perpetuating ugly ethnic stereotypes, however, are pure traffic gold, as evidenced from CSTB’s nearly 3 figures in advertising revenue earned last month.
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01.30.08
Posted in Blogged Down, Racism Corner, Radio, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 8:23 pm
by GC
I’m sure you’ll agree it totally sucks when jealous bloggers routinely mock successful, multi-media personalities who’ve worked so hard to attain fame and fortune. But enough about the cruel treatment afforded to Stephen A. Smith, let’s instead check out someone else’s take on Will Leitch.
“God Save The Fan” author Leitch, whose curious choice of party attire was featured here yesterday, recently sat still long enough to speak with National Public Radio’s Scott Simon. The latter could well have allowed Leitch to peddle his tried and tested spiel about crusty-press-box-reporters being out of touch with today’s fan, but instead took Will to task for some rather bizarre comments about prominent African-Americans, and didn’t let the Deadspin editor escape without suggesting he’s every bit as big a pandering creep as the television bozos he routinely lampoons.
Remarkably, with the exception of this entry, I’ve not seen a reference to said NPR interview elsewhere. That mainstream media outlets who’ve published Will’s work — The Sporting News, New York, The New York Times and GQ amongst them — might not consider such an exchange newsworthy is hardly a surprise. But the deafening silence from the sports blogosphere is rather out of character.
Let’s just imagine for a minute, a prominent pro jock, noted print journalist or sports television personality was interrogated about his or her racial sensibilities on a radio program and took it on the chin nearly as badly as Leitch. What’s the likelihood this hypothetical incident would go unnoticed by the same sports blogs who routinely cover even the slightest faux pas by an athlete or broadcaster?
Either there’s an overwhelming (quiet) consensus that Scott Simon’s out to lunch (but not so nutty that anyone feels compelled to defend Leitch), or there’s a glaring double standard.
(There’s also the possibility no one listens to NPR.)
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01.29.08
Posted in Blogged Down, Gridiron, Racism Corner, Will Leitch Sucks
at 7:30 pm
by GC
This has been some kinda month for Deadspin’s Will Leitch. Not only has he been wowing a national TV audience with his star turn as Christian radio host Chris Kennedy (above) on “Friday Night Lights”, but I’m told he’s got a new best seller in the bookstores, “God Save The Fran”. It’s about time someone had the guts to write an entire book about how Fran Drescher has so much more going on than a nice pair of legs, and while I’m not sure Will’s the man for the job, America’s sports fans his associates (and Will’s editor) would surely say otherwise.
If that weren’t enough excitement, Leitch is hosting a Super Bowl party and Mr. Irrelevant’s Chris Mottram is nearly beside himself with anticipation.
Going to a party hosted and attended by sports bloggers (along with endless amounts of beautiful women, I’m certain) in a nondescript sports bar in a strip mall somewhere around Glendale, Arizona is more intriguing to me than, say, the Maxim party (although not as intriguing as Dan Majerle’s party). Plus, Steinz and Ufford will be there. Actually, I think those two will be everywhere together this week. Word is that they’re sharing a hotel room. Hilarity is sure to ensue.
Granted, my own SB XLII party is unlikely to consist of much more than sharing a plate of nachos and a couch with a dog and two cats (one of ‘em prone to excessive coughing). But I couldn’t help wonder if a Leitch-hosted event would really be, y’know, off the hook (as the kids say) by comparison.
Judging from the snapshots on offer at Will’s Flickr page — helpfully linked to last week at Deadspin following the “God Save The Fran” publication shindig, this shall indeed be a killer event. A lot of major companies would balk at being associated with someone who exhibits this sort of cultural sophistication, but I salute both of them for standing by their man. Don’t let the pressure groups push you around, Harper-Collins and The Sporting News! Let freedom ring!
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01.21.08
Posted in Blogged Down, Fashion, The Marketplace, Will Leitch Sucks
at 12:31 pm
by GC
The above is currently being flogged by 289.com. Not since the Hitler European Tour tee have I seen a shirt as likely to get the wearer barred from most right-thinking establishments.
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01.11.08
Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 5:15 pm
by GC
From Boston Daily’s interview with “God Save The Fan” promo-touring Will Leitch.
BD: I really enjoyed the chapter about finding a bar to watch the Cardinals play the Mets (during the 2006 NLCS). Who can’t relate to an experience like that?
WL: When I walk down the streets of New York City and I see someone wearing a Cardinals hat, it’s like, ‘Yeah!’ And if I wasn’t wearing a Cardinals hat, you’d think I was crazy. To have all those Cardinals fans in one place was sensory overload. People are moving away from where they grew up, and a lot of times that means moving away from your team
Before that series, it was like, ‘Oh how cute. He’s a Cardinal fan,’ and when the Mets played the Cardinals, they hated me. It was fun to find that oasis. My favorite line from that is when we went back to the bar for Opening Day, we were all being nice and shaking hands, and a friend said, ‘This is weird. A few months ago, I got to third base with every woman in here.’ That kind of summed it up.
And what an oasis it must’ve been. I can’t think of any reason — let alone St. Louis’ recent status as Gonorrhea Capital Of The U.S. — why getting to 3rd base with a bar full of St. Louis ex-pats wouldn’t be the greatest thing in the world. But please, hands up, all of the actual New York readers who find the sight of traveling and/or displaced Cards fans on the 7 train, in the mezzanine at Shea Stadium, populating Gotham’s taverns, etc., to be “cute”.
Permalink
12.12.07
Posted in Baseball, Racism Corner, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:00 pm
by GC
(these guys shall honor Will’s request of “Speak English Or Die” just as soon as they learn the chords to “How Soon Is Now”)
From the 2008 Hardball Times Baseball Annual, an excerpt from “The Deadspin Spin On 2007″
(June)
Sammy Sosa hits his 600th home run to the cheers of a few thousand Rangers fans who mercifully for him, don’t speak English and lack the ability to put together words to form accusatory questions.
Strangely, Leitch’s irreverent recap of the 2007 baseball season failed to mention Tony La Genius’ inability to recite the alphabet.
The boxscore from June 20 cites a paid attendence of 37,564. There’s no breakdown of how many of those patrons spoke English and/or were slavish Sammy fans, but there’s all sorts of details the modern boxscore is lacking.
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11.30.07
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 5:22 pm
by GC
David Colon of The Gil Meche Experience has already noted the heavy irony of Deadspin’s Will Leitch tisk-tisking over his alma mater’s sports page going all TMZ on the likes of Jake Peavy.
And funnily enough, Will parlayed his experience at the Daily Illini and the Sporting News into a full-time job reposting drunk athlete photos.
Today’s no-good kids aren’t cutting their teeth on serious journalism like Will. They’re just going directly into drunk athlete pics. I wonder where they got the idea this might be a fun or lucrative thing to do?
In the meantime, the biggest, most widely-read chunk of the sportsdude blogosphere is almost entirely dependent on sub-FHM (or in some cases, copped from FHM) visual stimuli in order to generate any traffic whatsoever. If you’re waiting for Leitch to take a bold stand against such lazy minds, don’t hold your breath.
Much the way Leitch thought the kid who got the OJ interview scoop for ESPN was worthy of ridicule, he’s awfully selective in these instances.
In any case, Kyle Orton should be thrilled to know someone is standing up for higher standards.
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11.13.07
Posted in Blogged Down, Internal Affairs, Will Leitch Sucks, non-sporting journalism
at 5:02 pm
by GC
Though I’m not entirely sure what’s newsworthy about this not-so-humble blog receiving an (automated?) link from ESPN.com (particularly as Henry Abbot has already gone to judicious lengths to debate NSFW / SFW-tendencies), I’m gonna enjoy a tasty luncheon of delicious ironing over Will Leitch feigning umbrage over the WWL failing to include Deadspin amongst their linked sports sites.
We thank CSTB for its blog roll service and thoroughly endorse the site for a position at Page 2, but if only they can keep saying “cock.”
I’d like to think a thin, fleeting slice of recognition for CSTB from a beta section at ESPN.com and said organization’s blackballing of a mainstream competitor dangerous threat to the status quo like Leitch are entirely coincidental. And while I’m grateful for the job recommendation from Mr. Leitch, I really can’t afford the pay cut. But as far as moving to Olbermann’s least favorite city is concerned, to paraphrase one of my favorite blogs (one strangely absent from Deadspin or ESPN’s blogrolls), you go live in Bristol, Will.
Rather than confuse cheap-ass notoriety with some kind of achievement, I’m instead going to boycott ESPN.com for the remainder of the week or until they appoint the guy from Nosebleeds NFL Blog to determine some sort of fair link policy (perhaps in collaboration with the ombudslady), whichever comes first.
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05.25.07
Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 8:36 pm
by GC
It is very tempting to claim Sports Illustrated’s venerable Tom Verducci has forgotten more about baseball than Deadspin’s Will Leitch will ever learn. That, however, is probably a gross exaggeration. It might be more to the point to say that I’ve forgotten more about George Plimpton than Leitch has learned about Verducci, but either way, let’s review Will’s comments regarding Tom.
In ‘05, Verducci participated in Toronto’s spring training in Dunedin, FL. Last Monday, Verducci played right field for the Blue Jays during their Cooperstown, NY exhibition against the Orioles.
Were I a paying customer that afternoon, I might’ve been somewhat dismayed at Toronto denying playing time to another member of the organization in favor of the SI scribe. And while I don’t know Will Leitch’s whereabouts that day, he seems to take unusual umbrage for an altogether different reason.
We understand Verducci’s instinct; playing baseball was one of the most pleasurable things we’ve ever done, and we miss it, pretty much every day. But after a while, it really does just become a vanity project; yes, yes, Tom, we understand that you are in better shape than just about everybody else who covers baseball. But it might be time to let it go.
We understand the notion; believe us, Tom, we do. But it’s probably time to move on now. Every athlete scoffs that all sports reporters are just frustrated athletes. You’re not doing much to prove them wrong. We know it hurts. We know. But time to put the spikes away.
I guess I missed the part of Verducci’s article where he announced he’d be doing this annually. But just the same, he might do well to take Will’s advice and stick to far more dignified journalistic pursuits — like taking batting practice against John Rocker.
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02.01.07
Posted in Blogged Down, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 5:03 pm
by GC
I’m sophisticated enough about the big, goofy world of publicity to understand that CBS Sportsline’s Alex Rietmiller probably meant no harm in sending me a press release announcing that Will Leitch would be “glogging” Super Bowl XLI for SportsLine.
“We obviously pride ourselves on our strong original editorial, but pushing out additional content from unique voices like Deadspin and eventually allowing our best and brightest fans to publish on our site is a game-changer for us,” said Joe Ferreira, vice president of programming and executive producer of CBS SportsLine.
That said, it probably wasn’t a great idea to include the Screech’s phone number on the blurb.
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12.14.06
Posted in Baseball, Racism Corner, Video Games, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:52 pm
by GC
Deadspin’s Will Leitch links to a story claiming Tigers reliever Joel Zumaya sucked the big one in the World Series because of a jones for Guitar Hero 2. I suspect this report is a cover — Zumaya doesn’t want the hyper-sensitive Jimmy Leyland to know he’s been playing that Columbine Massacre video game. But that’s no big thing compared to author/journalist Jeff Pearlman’s take on Leitch’s recent happy hour audience with John Rocker.
In the course of our day together seven years ago, John and I stopped at a school for special-needs children somewhere outside of Atlanta. From the looks of it, the place didn’t have many financial resources, and Rocker’s appearance was probably the highlight of the year. Teachers oohed and aahed, kids went crazy. Upon our arrival, the two of us went into a back office, where an administrator explained to John that as he entered the gymnasium, they would play Twisted Sister’s “I Wanna Rock.”
Rocker nodded, did his thing, spoke (well) for five or 10 minutes, then returned to the office. With nary a flinch, he grabbed the CD, grinned and said to the overwhelmed administrator, “Y’all don’t mind if I have this, do you?” Then he left.
John Rocker is right. I am a liberal Jew from New York with an agenda. I have two African-American nephews who I want to grow up in a world indifferent to the color of their skin. I have gay friends who deserve the same love and respect and legal protections as everyone else. I don’t condemn people for not speaking English, just as I don’t condemn Rocker for speaking moron (OK, that’s a cheap shot, but it sure felt good).
If nothing else, at least we’re now up to speed on the biggest threat to Georgia’s cash-strapped public schools ; moochers who run off with the Twisted Sister CD’s. On behalf of the Peachtree state’s future leaders, I beg educators and administrators, don’t allow Chipper Jones to slink off with the Kix albums. They’re an important part of the curriculum.
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12.13.06
Posted in Baseball, Racism Corner, Will Leitch Sucks
at 3:49 pm
by GC
Before we get into the whole “what’s with the Will Leitch abuse?” question CSTB neophytes occasionally ask, I’ll remind you there’s a whole category to your right that you can peruse and come to your own nutty conclusions. But I will point out there have been a handful of occasions in which I’ve given the Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme Munching Motherfucker his props, the big one being the time he risked sending his own pretty face to hell by stepping into the box against John Rocker.
”
I’m truly sorry to say that said thumbs-up to Screechy is officially revoked. Leitch interviews Rocker at Deadspin today, and depending on your point of view, he either gives the former Brave ample rope with which to hang himself, or provides a strangely sympathetic shoulder for this lamebrain to cry on. Though there’s a handful of revelations (eg. Rocker was barred from entering Bungalow 8 because of a “Dominican doorman”, he describes John Schuerholz as “a real asshole…a complete moron…a piece of shit,”) the following excerpts are my favorite portions.
Leitch : What I find amazing about the aftermath of the story, and this is what I wrote in the Deadspin piece, was that Americans love second acts. No matter what a celebrity does, if they say they’re sorry for it, and seem legitimately apologetic, we tend to root for them to recover, at least until they screw up again. But that never happened with you. You gave that interview, and from every day since then until now, you were The Racist. You never got a second act. I’m not saying you necessarily deserved one, but people usually don’t deserve one. Why do you think that interview just set it all in stone like that? Did you ever try to resalvage your reputation? Are you still trying? Is that what the book is for?
Rocker : Naw, I don’t think the book will help with that, and I don’t care. The book is more conservative Republican rantings. The Bill O’Reillys of the world, they will appreciate it, the Rush Limbaughs of the world will appreciate it, but, unfortunately, most members of the media – well, I don’t know what you are politically.
Leitch : I’m an agnostic. Politics terrify me.
Rocker : Well, anyway, those liberal media people, they’ll appreciate some things, but I am a Republican. I’m not Republican in everything – I mean, look at my girlfriend – and I’m not a huge pro-lifer, but I think 95 percent-plus of the media is liberal, and they see me as the antichrist of liberal views. It’s much easier for them to just keep piling on than to look closer and realize that, hey, we might have been wrong about this guy.
Leitch : When you guys walk down the street, and people see that you’re John Rocker, do they say anything?
Rocker : I don’t ever make eye contact with people on the street. I’ve become like a New Yorker in that way. People want to say, “Hey, has John Rocker changed, has he turned over a new leaf?” I haven’t changed at all. I don’t understand why it’s so hard for journalists to admit that I haven’t changed; they were just wrong. Maybe they made me change by writing an article or something. That song by Joe Walsh, “Life’s Been Good To Me So Far,” that’s totally how it is. I haven’t changed.
Leitch : How far along with the book are you?
Rocker : I’ve got about 70 pages written. I’ve put it on hold for a bit until I find a publisher. When the deal is done, I’ll finish it up over the course of the next couple of months. That’s the thing, though: When people have an agenda, that’s all that matters. Jeff Pearlman is who he is: A liberal Jew from New York. He’s one of their own, who spent a couple of hours with me, pulled things out of context, and you’re trying to create a persona of an individual when you don’t know them.
(prior liberal Jew from New York postings on the subject of John Rocker :
Noted Free Speech Advocate Dimisses Sensitivity Training, 6/25/06
Some Of John Rocker’s Best Friends, 6/01/06
Rocker Still Smarting Over Glavine Blow-off, 3/29/06
Panic In Needle Dick Park, 3/7/06
Racist Fuck Down On His Luck To Appear On The Deuce, 3/6/06
Ladies Of Long Island, Take Note, 2/27/06
Grassroots Effort To Give Guns To Quail Picks Up Steam, 2/19/06
Racist Fuck No Longer A Duck, 6/27/05
Dumb Rocker Aspires To Deafness, 05/13/05
Pete Jr. Sticks Up For Rocker, 05/12/05
Rocker Compares Self To Jackie, 05/6/05
Rocker, Still A Millionaire, 05/04/05
Racist Fuck Extends Olive Branch, 04/15/05
Ducks Sign Racist Fuck, 04/8/05
Permalink
12.01.06
Posted in Gridiron, Racism Corner, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:34 pm
by GC
I didnt’ catch Chris Carter’s interview with the Chiefs’ Larry Johnson on HBO’s “Inside The NFL” last night, but Jeffrey Flanagan of the Kansas City Star quotes a few of the highlights.
Carter asked LJ, “Do you think Herm Edwards (above), being an African-American and you being raised, of course, by an African-American, that you see a lot of similarities in Herm that you saw in your dad that made you open up to him?”
LJ’s response: “I think so. I could relate to Herman. I couldn’t do that with the other coaches I had because they had not done it. You know, they haven’t put those pads or they haven’t been in the situation as a young black athlete and know what we had to go through.
“You know, when we go out, you know, we like to go out. You know, we like to hang out. We like to have fun. But then you got to worry about the guy around the corner with the gun. You got to worry about this girl on the block. You got to worry about, you know, your parents. You got to worry about your homeboys taking advantage of you.
“There’s so much things you got to worry about being a young black athlete. And to be able to have a father like mine and have a coach like Herm, I was able to escape a lot of those realities and find myself in a new ray of light.”
Conversely, LJ wasn’t nearly as enthusiastic when asked about Herm’s predecessor, Dick Vermeil.
“I wouldn’t pay attention,” Johnson said of playing under Vermeil. “My eyes, I would be up in the sky. You know, I would be sleeping in my locker. I wouldn’t carry my playbook because I was just trying to get away from this building, you know, when Dick was here.”
ESPN ombudsman George Solomon has made the none-too-original observation that Michael Irvin’s ill-advised remarks regarding Tony Romo’s ancestry are comparable to the comments that cost Jimmy “The Greek” Snyder his CBS gig. As luck would have it, Solomon’s comments appear the very same day that Deadspin’s Will Leitch takes ESPN.com’s Scoop Jackson to task for the latter’s theft appropriation of the term “Orange Roundie”, previously employed by Yay Sports. Of course, this is the first time in recorded history a full-time, electronic correspondent has blatantly lifted material from elsewhere without attribution. Since there’s no Gakwer Media ombudsman on hand to sort it out, let’s be absolutely clear about this. Swiping of someone else’s writing is inexcusable and shameful. While watering down entire concepts and themes that others have previously mastered is…kinda lucrative.
Permalink
10.16.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 6:10 pm
by GC
If you’re gonna use a photograph that I took of Eric Byrnes pretending he’s Bob Probert, please, go right ahead. But the very least you can do is acknowledge where you grabbed it from. If such a common courtesy is completely beyond your limited capabilities, I’m afraid I will have to continue to pay the homeless to beat off on photos of your fiancee.
yours,
Suck My Dick Avedon
ADDENDUM :
To the mailbag!
Was just sent the link to your post about the Byrnes photo. You’ll have to forgive me; I took the photo from this site —two weeks ago and credited him then. I did not know that he had taken it from you. My apologies. I’ve updated it in the original post.
Best,
Will
I think we have to agree this a stand-up act from a man who earns a living sitting down. And in the spirit of greater harmony, not only shall I refrain from further attempts to bribe those less fortunate into a vulgar act involving an innocent person’s likeness, but said funds will instead be re-directed towards a charitable donation to Avert.org, in honor of St. Louis’ noble efforts to reduce the spread of gonorrhea.
Permalink
10.03.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:14 am
by GC
There’s an action packed thread taking place over at the venerable Baseball Think Factory (what else is new?), this one concerning the Human Whoopee Cushion’s clumsy handling of the Jason Grimsley affidavit, and his subsequent apology for implicating Albert Pujols’ trainer, Chris Mihlfeld.
In additon to learning that my long-standing enmity towards Will Leitch is based on a “Cards/Cubs rivalry” (!), further revelations were provided by avowed CSTB non-reader Garth Sears.
Will Leitch, editor-in-chief and main writer of Deadspin.com, used to be the editor-in-chief I believe of The Sporting News and I would imagine is one of the finer and best-paid sports bloggers out there. As such, I’m sure he has very good sources in many places. He’s actually turning his profession into a money-making proposition. Go figure.
Screech was an associate/online editor for The Sporting News. He did, however, discover the internet and was personally responsible for finding the Lindbergh baby.
That said, Sears must be way older than me. I can’t remember when prostitution wasn’t a money-making proposition (and his mom giving out free samples really doesn’t count).
Permalink
10.02.06
Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 11:06 am
by GC
The Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme Eating Motherfucker uses “we” where “I” would surely be more appropriate.
As many of you will remember, back in June, a source we thought was reliable leaked to us that one of the names in the infamous Jason Grimsley HGH affidavit was Chris Mihlfeld (above), who is the former trainer for Grimsley and the longtim (sic) trainer of Albert Pujols. As evidenced by the Los Angeles Times this weekend, our source was, sadly, wrong. And therefore, so were we: Mihlfeld appears not to be named in the document.
So, a clearing of the decks, a mea culpa: We were wrong to trust our source’s information, and we were wrong to print their claim that he was in the document. We apologize to Mihlfeld and deeply regret the error.
Nice work, Screech. They must be very proud of you at the Daily Illini.
Permalink
09.21.06
Posted in Basketball, History's Great Hook-Ups, Will Leitch Sucks
at 9:32 pm
by GC
The Oregonian’s Maxine Bernstein on the recent sexual assault charges filed against the Blazers’ Zach Randolph (link swiped from True Hoop) :
The investigation showed that Randolph (above) asked his “occasional sex partner” and another woman whom he had not met before to perform a simulated sex show at the hotel room. There was some discrepancy as to whether or not Randolph asked the women to perform oral sex, but there was no dispute that sex was only simulated in the show that was performed, Rees wrote in the memo.
The woman who filed the complaint said Randolph was disappointed that the show had only simulated sex and refused to pay her. After the show, she said, she had consensual sex with Randolph’s friend and then fell asleep or “passed out.” She claimed she awoke and found Randolph trying to have anal sex with her. She told investigators she awoke and “slapped” Randolph away twice. Ultimately, she told police that Randolph lifted her onto a table and had sex with her while she shook her head “no,” the memo says.Prosecutors said the woman admitted she was extremely intoxicated, having had three cocktails and three double shots of tequila — alcohol purchased by Randolph.
The other woman involved in the show told investigators she did not witness any sex between Randolph and the complainant, saying she was physically ill and spent about 21/2 hours in the bathroom.
A male friend of Randolph’s was in the room and was interviewed by detectives. He described himself as a member of the “Hoop Family,” one of Randolph’s close associates. He said he “frequently sexually shares women” with Randolph but denied any knowledge of money passing between Randolph and the women that night.
Observed the Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme Eating Motherfucker, “it makes the supposedly glorious life of an NBA star sound boozy, drowsy and extremely unhappy. And pathetic, from all sides.”
Perhaps. But we all have our own ways of defining unhappy and pathetic.
Permalink
09.11.06
Posted in Free Expression, Will Leitch Sucks
at 7:18 pm
by GC
The Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme Eating Motherfucker (above) lays down the law to his mouth-breathing acoloytes and those who wish to scarf the spicy sauce. Said edict should in no way be confused with this sort of thing.
You no longer have to ask to be approved for comments. That is not to say that the approval-based system no longer exists. Far from it, in fact: There’s now a stricter system in place. It’s just that, as you might have noticed, you can go ahead and type in comments on stories without having been explicitly sent an invite. What happens to these comments? They go into a little queue, and at the end of the day, we dig through this queue and see which commenters appear to have something to contribute to the Deadspin experience. If you’re approved — and we’re going to be rather stingy about this — your comments will appear on the site, and you’ll be a member of the gang. So if your comment shows, congrats: You’re in. If your comment doesn’t make it, it doesn’t mean you’re permanently out of the loop. You just need to keep trying. As we have established, you gotta raise your game around here.
Permalink
09.07.06
Posted in Will Leitch Sucks
at 6:51 pm
by GC
The tendency to rebel against the path set by one’s parents, while entirely natural, is no guarantee of success in a particular field. Whether it’s the fruit of Rupert Murdoch’s loins going belly up with the otherwise wonderous Rawkus label or Vince McMahon Jr. morphing his dad’s company into the garish “sports entertainment” empire we know and loathe today, history is litered with such examples.
So with that in mind, I can fully understand why Will Leitch waited until Deadspin’s One Year Anniversary to reveal that he is the offspring of James Dolan.
Permalink
08.29.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 7:20 pm
by GC
I have to admit, I’m very impressed the Taco Bell Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme spokesmodel would put his petty jealousies aside when issuing the above invites. On the other hand, if you were about to marry this, you’d no longer be so picky about who you were hanging out with, either.
Though it’s a nice thought, I have a prior engagement at Brian Bannister Bobblehead Night on Coney Island. And I’d sooner leave Von LMO in charge of my house than willingly spend time at Blondie’s of the Upper East Side. Was the Ground Round all booked up?
Still, just cuz I’m busy doesn’t mean the rest of you lot can’t crash the shindig. Tell Ariana Huffington I said hi!
Permalink
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:08 pm
by GC
…is not, sadly,between myself and a pseudononymous Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme acolyte, aka “jblo” who contributed the following to Deadspin’s (registration-required) comments section :
I’m sorry, but that’s just plain unfair.
I hate Will far more than Mel Gibson hates Jews. And unlike Mel, I can be completely sober when stating publicly that ethically challenged, xenophobic, frat-fuck pandering “nice guys” like Will are responsible for all of the wars in the world.
Instead, the real virtual brawl to settle it all is taking place right this moment between Michael Kay and Larry Bowa. Sort of.
Permalink
07.25.06
Posted in Sports Journalism, Sports TV, Will Leitch Sucks
at 6:38 pm
by GC
Slightly overeager to detemine the true cause of Harold Reynolds’ dismissal from ESPN yesterday, Deadspin’s Will Leitch gleefully ran 5 seperate, unattributed items claiming the former Mariners second baseman’s termination was related to a specific charge of sexual harrassment, if not a longstanding pattern of behavior.
Having succeeded in publicly smearing Reynolds, Leitch followed the matter up later in the day with an “insider” denial of the sexual harrassment allegations (supposedly, Reynolds had an off-camera “meltdown” during discussions of “Baseball Tonight”s coverage of the A-Rod saga). Far from contrite in any role he might’ve played in libeling Reynolds, Leitch added,
The longer ESPN pretends like nothing happened, like they’re a corner shop with three employees, believing this stuff can possibly remain private, the more talk there will be. Still, this is the lone “it’s not sexual harassment email” we’ve received.
So there you have it. ESPN is obliged to provide full, explicit details of just what is happening within their walls, otherwise Will Leitch’s readers might die of curiosity. 5 anonymous tips calling Harold Reynolds a serial ass-grabbber obviously carry more weight than one denial. If Leitch can just find another dozen people to say the Holocaust never happened, well, that’s good enough for me.
Of course, even if he has no conscience to speak of, Leitch is perfectly entitled to go after whatever public figures he wants — though I suspect it might be a tad tougher finding financing for a blog that openly discusses Nick Denton’s sexual history. And on that tip, let’s not kid ourselves. A cocktail party or two turns out differently and the Taco Bell Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme eating motherfucker could just as easily have been writing gags for Page 2, while some other sad sack (preferably one with a personality and not nearly as obvious a browser history) is shitting all over the Connecticut-based Disney employees.
UPDATE : Newsday’s Neil Best citing his sources as “three people who work at ESPN” reports tonight that “the cause was a pattern of sexual harassment, apparently culminating in a recent incident involving one of the network’s young production assistants.”
Sexual harassment charges are nothing new at ESPN, which operates out of a sprawling “campus” in relatively isolated Bristol, Conn., and employs many production assistants in their early 20s. The network has an extensive program of education and sensitivity regarding gender issues and an elaborate system for pursuing claims of sexual harassment.
Keith Olbermann of MSNBC, a former ESPN host, told The New York Observer in 2004 he had testified in “three or four major cases at ESPN.”
If push comes to shove, Best should be able to produce some documentation that these claims came from actual persons who work at ESPN. Unless of course, he too, is comfortable with being 80% sure.
Permalink
07.20.06
Posted in Gridiron, History's Great Hook-Ups, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:42 pm
by GC
Of a report in today’s Boston Herald citing Patriots coach Bill Belichick (above) as “The Other Man” in a New Jersey divorce case (Belichick has supposedly been carrying on with Sharon Shennoca, “a slim, blue-eyed 41-year-old stay-at-home mom,” and former New York Giants receptionist), the Human Whoopie Cushion writes, “It’s impossible for anyone to deny Belichick’s coaching prowess over the last few years. But who know what he was capable of?”
Good grief, apparently the Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme spokesmodel has forgotten the whole mess just a few months ago in which the coach was linked to Bonnie Bernstein, along with insinutations by the Globe’s Ron Borges that Belichick might be doing something unsavory “when everyone else is sleeping”. If a professional “sports” blogger’s sole claim to fame is his ability to stay on top of others’ zipper problems (aside from his own, naturally), is a little research (said in Geico caveman voice) too much to ask for?
(Sorry, I forgot about the other claim to fame.)
Permalink
07.18.06
Posted in Baseball, The Internet, Will Leitch Sucks
at 5:16 pm
by GC
Ryan McConnell’s Always Amazin’ is a regular treasure trove of Mets info, and unlike a certain lazy, duplicitious shitbag, he’s very good at attributing where some of his content comes from. On Tuesday, McConnell linked to a report by the Newark Star-Ledger’s Lisa Kennelly on Scott Schafer’s fateful encounter with a popular social networking website.
The Texas teenager might have gotten away with putting the Mets logo on the page. But the references to his anatomy and the jokes about how much the 18-year-old pitcher enjoyed beer? Well, that’s another matter.
The Mets launched an investigation into his character. The agent who had been advising Schafer dropped him. And eventually he signed for a lower price than his sixth-round status warranted.
He’s now pitching for the rookie level Gulf Coast Mets in Florida, where he has made one start, allowing no runs on a hit and two walks, and striking out three in two innings. The MySpace profile has since been taken down. The Mets declined to make him available for an interview or to comment.
Overreaction? Maybe. Nobody’s business but his? Hardly.
Schafer’s case shows that sports are no exception to the risks of the information age, where it takes less time to Google for pictures of drunk athletes than it does to Mapquest your way to the stadium.
“There’s no such thing as a private life,” said Marjorie Brody, an author and expert on business etiquette. “Everyone has access to everything.”
Matt Sosnick, who represents Marlins’ pitcher Dontrelle Willis among other major leaguers, was advising Schafer when he heard about the 18-year-old’s MySpace comments. He was concerned enough with its vulgarity to sever his ties with Schafer.
“We just felt like, when I was told exactly what had been written, that it was a bad basis for our relationship,” Sosnick said.
Using good judgment about one’s public image is nothing new. The Mets do not advise their players specifically about their visibility on the Internet, but the team speaks generally about players being smart about what they do in their time away from the ballpark.
“When we talk to all the young players in the spring, we tell them as soon as you are identified with the Mets organization, you have to be conscious of everything,” says Jay Horwitz, Mets vice president of media relations. “Anything you do as a member of the Mets organization is magnified.”
Damn. Heavy stuff. I’m very down with the modern world, and you don’t have to tell me there’s precious little privacy on the net for talented young people. Or for this guy, either.
And who better to pass judgement on an 18 year old than a former teenage ticket scalper like Matt Sosnick?
Finally, today is a terrific day for Jay Horowitz to pontificate on the Mets’ efforts to protect their young players from doing something that might make them look stupid in public.
I’m not connected nearly well enough to know if the hemming and hawing over a mooted White Sox/Mets deal has died down yet, but Metsradmus has done his part to end the conversation.
Apparently there’s still a large misconception floating around major league circles. Allow me to clarify you GM’s out there who happen to be reading this blog looking for ideas:
Jim Duquette no longer works here.
How else could one explain this phenomenon, the one which manifests itself into White Sox GM Kenny Williams requesting Filthy Sanchez and Mike Pelfrey for Freddy Garcia…a pitcher that is experiencing some “dead arm” issues.
Williams obviously has been drinking the Chuck Lamar kool-aid while reading his new book “The Best Trades Are The Ones You Don’t Make, Unless The Mets Are On The Other End Of The Phone”.
The Kansas City Star’s Bob Dutton claims the Royals and Mets are discussing a swap of 2B Rubin Gotay for Tides 2B Jeff Keppinger. Apparently, Keppinger is forever buried on the organization’s depth chart behind Jose Valentin, Chris Woodward, Anderson Hernandez and Tim Teuful. Even Aaron Heilman thinks he’s being disrespected.
Lastings Milledge had a paid of hits and an RBI in the Tides’ 6-5 loss to Indianapolis yesterday. The back-from-suspension Yusaku Iriki allowed 6 runs on 9 hits, walking 3 in 5 innings. Iriki was working on two days’ rest, but considering he had about two months off, I suppose no one is worried about wrecking his arm.
Permalink
07.17.06
Posted in "Wife Beater" Is Not A Fashion Statement, Baseball, Cricket, Will Leitch Sucks
at 4:54 pm
by GC
It was a lost weekend for the Dodgers in St. Louis, and self-appointed Arbiter of Effort Brad Penny (above) isn’t taking things lying down. From the LA Daily News’ Tony Jackson.
“We looked sloppy,” said Dodgers pitcher Brad Penny, who clearly wasn’t at his best in his first start since a two-inning stint in the All-Star Game. “We had two extra-inning games where we had a chance, but we didn’t play very good. It’s that simple.
“We need more enthusiasm. We look tired all the time. We just looked flat. We let people take extra bases, and I left balls over the plate and didn’t make my pitches.
“If we’re going to make it to the playoffs, we have to start picking it up a lot.”
Shortly after the game-time temperature was announced at 93 degrees — suggesting they must keep the thermometer in the shade — Penny took the mound and gave up consecutive, one-out doubles to Chris Duncan and Albert Pujols, putting the Dodgers in a 1-0 hole.
Although the Cardinals are used to playing in such conditions and although the Dodgers’ idea of humidity is being hit in the face by ocean spray while standing on the Santa Monica Pier, Dodgers manager Grady Little refused to say the weather was a factor in his team’s four-game humiliation.
“It was the same for both teams,” he said. “It didn’t matter. They’re not (used to it), either. It’s not this bad here six months out of the year.”
Indeed, and perhaps the Dodgers will fare better in those crucial visits to Busch Stadium that take place in December.
Philadelphia’s Brett Myers (above) made his second start since being accused of spousal abuse and collected the win with 7 strong innings against the Giants yesterday. Deadspin’s Will Leitch wonders why the throng at AT&T Park didn’t do the right thing and lambaste the alleged wife-beater.
Not booing Brett Myers? What’s wrong with you guys? Is anybody awake over there?
Alas, the San Francisco Chronicle’s Scott Oster explains, “one possible reason Giants’ fans didn’t spew venom Sunday was that many were unaware. I spoke to more than a dozen women before the game and only two knew vaguely of the story.”
So there you have it. Despite being residents of a cosmopolitan city, a town with no shortage of newspapers, sports radio, TV, internet access, etc., many of the casual fans in attendence are blissfully ignorant of things that happen outside of their own little world. Kind of like an alleged NYC resident who apparently has never witnessed a cricket match of any sort. No wonder his parents put all his stuff in the back of a cab, the Spicy Crunchwrap Supreme-eating motherfucker needs to get out of the house more often.
Permalink
07.12.06
Posted in Baseball, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 10:55 pm
by GC
You’d think a life-long, red-feathered St. Louis Cardinals fan like Will Leitch would have to be 100% certain before spreading a rumor about one of the names redacted in the Jason Grimsley indictment — especially knowing that the name in question, that of former Royals strength & conditioning coach Chris Mihlfeld (above) would ultimately be linked to the former wrestler’s client and pal, the Cards’ All-Universe 1B Albert Pujols.
(Leitch. Not shown : Taco Bell Crunchwrap Supreme, fed-up parents)
As it turns out, 80% sure is close enough. From Pitch.com’s Ben Payner (link courtesy Repoz)
Will Leitch, the New York City-based, full-time editor of Deadspin.com, stands by his story. Leitch has a journalism degree from the University of Illinois and says he has written for Sporting News, The St. Louis Post-Dispatch and The New York Times. Last year, his site was lauded in a Sports Illustrated piece about credible online sources. But Deadspin is part of Gawker Media, a blog company that has a reputation for using questionable reporting methods and sources.
Leitch says his source was operating on secondhand information leaked by another person who claimed to have seen an unredacted version of the Grimsley affidavit. Leitch acknowledges that the mainstream media wouldn’t have considered the source legitimate. But he says his site did annotate the report by explaining that its credibility was an eight on a scale of 10. “Is The New York Times willing to run with that story? Probably not,” Leitch admits. “But we said upfront there’s a possibility that we’re not 100 percent on this. I have no choice but to stand by my source just like any other journalist would.”
Pujols (above) has also offered to cover Mihlfeld’s legal fees if the trainer does file a lawsuit against those who have accused him of having a connection to steroids. “Definitely, because I know the guy and I know he’s innocent,” Pujols says. “I just wish the stupid people who wrote whatever they did about the guy, they should have found out the facts before they wrote their stupid article. But that’s just how the media is, and that’s something you can’t control.”
Permalink
05.11.06
Posted in Blogged Down, The Law, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:51 pm
by GC
On Monday in this space, the case of Evan Chaggaris was briefly noted.
Chaggaris (above) was sentenced to five months probation after being found guilty of writing threatening letters to various ESPN employees, including unspecified on-air talent.
David Scott of Scott’s Shots has many of the specifics, gory details that have the squeamish Will Leitch commenting,
Suddenly, it doesn’t seem very funny. Not that it ever did.
Of course not. “Funny” would be encouraging the nation’s youth to stalk Chris Berman and risk a slapping from the alleged lothario’s meaty paws. “Funny” would be accepting a paycheck from a firm that not only rejoices in the invasion of celebrity privacy, but provides a fucking map for those who might wanna, y’know, dismember the stars and starlets who’ve previously eluded them. “Funny” would be proclaiming virtually every “Fire ______ ” website to be a work of near-genius, yet expressing surprise when you suddenly find yourself with “An Unknown Online Enemy.”
Or maybe it isn’t really that funny. Maybe it’s just the height of hypocrisy.
Permalink
03.25.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 9:43 pm
by GC
Friday afternoon, Will Leitch made perhaps his boldest public statement since making us read about his penis troubles. Yesterday, he took the unprecedented step of calling out the Ben Domenech of hate fuck radio, Colin Cowherd.
A note — once again — for those of you who read “the Internet.” The “Internet” is produced by people, human beings; it is not something that just appears, zap!, out of the ether. When you read something on “the Internet,” it was written by someone, a person who has a dog, eats cereal in the morning and pays his/her electric bill. It didn’t just show up; it belongs to someone. You can’t just take it. It’s pretty amazing we have to keep saying this.
Nice one, Will. I couldn’t agree more.
Permalink
03.13.06
Posted in Baseball, Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:05 pm
by GC
Will Leitch struggles to think of “Four Things You Didn’t Know About The New York Mets”.
4) Glavine Still Has All of His Teeth.
Pitcher Tom Glavine, who is closing in on 300 career victories (he needs 25), almost never made it to the majors. He was a three-time All-Conference hockey player at Billerica (Mass.) Memorial High School, and was drafted by both the Atlanta Braves and in the fourth round and by the Los Angeles Kings (NHL) in 1984.
A fascinating tidbit. Except Tom Glavine doesn’t have all of his teeth.
Permalink
02.28.06
Posted in Basketball, Blogged Down, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 6:55 pm
by GC
The New York Post’s Peter Vescey is Will Leitch’s latest nominee for “Your Hometown Columnist Sucks”, a pretty rich concept considering that a “columnist” in Leitch’s own hometown would be the person who transcribes the cinema start times.
Writes Will,
is Vecsey at least funny? You tell us: “Following his 1-for-16 misadventure in Game 1 against the Sonics, Mike Bibby, desperate to figure out his shooting problem, drove to the nearest Wendy’s to see if its employees could put their finger on it.” Um, what?
Admittedly, that’s not even close to Vescey’s best line. But still funnier than anything you’d find in a month of reading Deadspin.
Though hardly above reproach, Vescey is the guy who suggested that Pat Riley stopped talking about “The Disease Of Me” and switched to “The Disease Of Thee” when he noticed Madonna was sitting courtside. The same Vescey that labelled the Daily News’ Filip “King Kong Bondy” and was tearing into Will’s pet Stephen “Anal” Smith when Deadspin was just a twinkle in Nick Denton’s eye.
Some other recent classic gems from Vescey’s “Hoops Du Jour” :
Georgia’s runaway bride, Jennifer Wilbanks, has been indicted for filing false statements and false police reports. She faces up to six years in the pokey, or, if the judge really wants to stick it to her, six Hawks home games.
John Stockton, by the way, returned to the Delta Center Wednesday night at the Jazz unveiled an eight-foot statue of him outside the arena. The statue inside the arena is known as Carlos Boozer.
After eyeballing Sunday’s 64-62 eyesore (the Pistons won despite missing each and every one of 15 field goal tries in the fourth quadrant) Larry Brown announced he was going in for additional hip surgery. He denies he has any intentions of switching hospitals.
Michael Olowokandi finally earned his Timberwolves keep by provoking Nene into a fist-fight, the way it was meant to be, mano-a-mano instead of mano-a-fanatico. Both received the same four-game sanctioned sentence and we all know who came out ahead on that score. The Crying Wolves, who hosted Toronto last night, have dutifully improved on this Kandi-free diet, winning that game in Denver and the next vs. the frontcourt-less Blazers.
This just in: So it shouldn’t be a total loss, Latrell Sprewell petitioned David Stern to turn over Olowokandi’s paychecks to his near starving family.
Say this much about Darko, his team has made the playoffs both of his seasons. Joe Dumars deserves a lot of credit for for not trading up and taking LeBron James.
David Stern’s league, chock full of provocatively dressed and undulating dance teams, has banned players from listening to music during pre-game warm-ups. Vince Carter and others got the word iPods are not part of the NBA’s standard uniform and thus cannot be worn.
Carter, who received the iPod as a gift for being the only person not attacked at the Vibe awards, is appealing Stern’s fearless ruling.
Donald Stern and Mark Cuban have worked out a deal re fines. In the future, any money collected from the owner will be used to bribe people to watch his next show.
Kobe made a point of thanking the Clippers for their interest when the Lakers played them during preseason, but, “like I always say, no means no.”
As far as I can tell, Vescey’s biggest sin is that he’s far more skilled at disembowling ESPN and TNT’s on-air talent, than our Man from Mantoon.
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02.23.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:16 pm
by GC
It’s sad enough when the understudies list Chelsea/Barcelona on ESPN2 as part of “To Watch Tonight” after the match has ended, but what to make of today’s revelation that Spurs G Tony Parker fancies himself to be a rapper?
Fuck, how did the rest of the world miss that one?
Just to save you some time, here are some upcoming Deadspin scoops that will be appearing in the days ahead ;
* – Ron Artest might be crazy.
* – Shaquille O’Neal has also recorded a “rap” album.
* – Steve Nash is Canadian.
* – Kyle Korver is white.
You’re very welcome.
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02.06.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 3:53 pm
by GC
The Human Whoopee Cushion seems mildly perturbed that Sports Illustrated’s Steve Rushin has been named National Sportswriter of the Year by the National Sportscasters and Sportswriters Association. And indeed, who amongst us isn’t disappointed that the award didn’t go to a guy that combs On The DL for his most traffic-boosting features?
On the laff-riot meter, Rushin can be counted on for a funny gag every 2 or 3 issues. Not the highest of batting averages, admittedly, but far better than the Al Leiter of sports blogging.
Writes Will,
Rushin also proves that the best way to win a national sportswriter of the year award is never actually have an opinion, but be a big fan of jokes about Viagra and sand traps.
If only the voters had consisted of bright minds like Warren St. John and Vincent Mallozzi, some overdue recognition could’ve gone to say, a big fan of jokes about Peyton Manning being queer.
Still, as preposterous as it may seem, the Human Whoopie Cushion calling anyone out who can actually string a sentence together, I’m grateful it happened in this instance. The likelihood of Leitch getting his ass kicked by Rebecca Lobo just increased exponentially.
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02.05.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Gridiron, Sports TV, Will Leitch Sucks
at 6:00 pm
by GC
From American’s foremost authority on giggling at black people, The Human Whoopie Cushion :
A reader also points out how pleased we were to see that Cleveland from “Family Guy” had the opportunity to also sing the national anthem.
Maybe you get precisely the sort of readers you deserve?
Yeah, they’re the exact same guy. I mean, just look at them.
This sort of sophisticated analysis does remind me a bit of the Austin columnist who insists on comparing Stephen A. Smith to Eddie Murphy.
I will say that these David LaChappelle Burger King ads are really freaking me out. And the price of a Super Bowl spot must’ve really dropped if Ian Michael Black is considered a suitable pitchman.
(UPDATE : What I meant to say, the price of a Super Bowl spot must’ve really dropped if Jay Mohr is considered a suitable pitchman. At this rate, we’ll see advertisements starring Scott Ferrall and Tom Arnold by halftime.)
UPDATE 2 : Incredibly, they’ve played an entire half of football and neither Al Michaels nor John Madden has said a word about the drunken photos of Ben Roethlisberger that appeared in the neutered version of On The DL. Am I overreacting when I say this calls for a Congressional investigation?)
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02.02.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Gridiron, Will Leitch Sucks
at 3:28 pm
by GC
If a Seattle player, Jeremy Stevens or otherwise, thinks that their team is going to win the game on Sunday, that doesn’t qualify as trash talk.,
Memphis Bengal, Sports Frog, 09:20am, February 2.
This is what Seahawks tight end Jerramy Stevens said on Tuesday: “[Jerome Bettis being from Detroit] is a heartwarming story and all that. But it will be a sad day when he leaves without that trophy.” This “trash talk” can be translated, quite easily, as “we think we are going to win Sunday.”
It doesn’t matter how many microphones you stick in Joey Porter’s face. This is not trash talk. This is not interesting. This is not a story.
Will Leitch, Deadspin, 12:55pm, February 2.
Nope, the real story of Super Bowl Week is that Deadspin ran a bunch of photos of Ben Roethlisberger looking drunk and sloppy, and despite a shout out on “Cold Pizza” (suddenly his favorite TV show after all these months) Will is miffed that he didn’t receive props from a real newspaper.
And with that, I’ll add my voice to this brave chorus. Stringers, freelancers, columnists, traveling bloggers, etc., I beseech you! Do not give in to the temptation of puff pieces, desperate attempts at “bulletin board material”, etc. You’ve got one responsibility to your readers this week and one only : MAKE CERTAIN YOUR SUPER BOWL COVERAGE REVOLVES AROUND DEADSPIN.
Thank you.
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Posted in Basketball, Blogged Down, Racism Corner, Will Leitch Sucks
at 11:37 am
by GC
Golden State Warriors media flack Eric Govan was fired yesterday for bulk e-mailing some snapshots from the “ghetto prom” websites that have poppped up in recent years.
Observed the mature, sensitive Will Leitch (above, right), “The computer “send” button: Aside from death, is there anything more frighteningly conclusive?”
Indeed, Will should know. Were Govan guilty of say, suggesting that Mike Tyson can’t read or that Isiah Thomas doesn’t know how to use a computer, he might instead have ended up the subject of a flattering NY Times profile.
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02.01.06
Posted in Hockey, Will Leitch Sucks
at 5:59 pm
by GC
From Will Leitch’s “What To Watch Tonight” :
• NHL: Flightless Sea Fowl at Rangers. We hear it’s Giveaway Night at the Garden … but then, isn’t just about every night giveaway night at the Garden? [MSG]
The New York Rangers are 16-6-5 at home this season. Granted, the Knicks are hopeless, but to kid about MSG being Loser Central with a Rangers’ fixture as the example just doesn’t work.
However, if I chose to point out that the St. Louis Blues have the worst record in the NHL, and that St. Louis is officially the Gonorrhea Capital Of The USA, I’d be telling the truth.
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01.28.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Sports Journalism, Will Leitch Sucks
at 9:07 pm
by GC
Despite the very cozy “you link me, I’ll quote you” relationship between the NY Times’ Warren St. John and Deadspin’s Will Leitch —- a mutual masturbation session that should at the very least, prove troubling to the former’s editors (the latter having already shown no conscience to speak of) — the Gray Lady is at it again, throwing more plaudits in Leitch’s direction in tomorrow’s Sunday edition courtesy of Vincent M. Mallozzi. (thanks to Repoz for the link)
Will Leitch, a lifelong Cardinals fan, took a job in 1996 covering his favorite baseball team for The St. Louis Post-Dispatch.
Keep dreaming.
“I learned that there is no place in the world less joyful than a press box,” said Leitch, 30.
Yeah, tell those sorry ass motherfuckers in Rwanda to stop their sobbing.
“If ESPN gets a story that they don’t consider news or might not be in their best interest to run, well, it’s no longer a story and we never hear about it,” said Leitch, who worked briefly for New York Times Digital in 2000. “But if I get a really good scoop from one of my sources or something really interesting from a fan, I have the freedom to post it without having to deal with any political pressure.”
“One of my sources” = old issues of USA Today Baseball Weekly or RSS feeds from other blogs. Really, where’s the Paper Of Record’s love for On The DL?
“Basically, the site allows me to be a reporter, and it allows sports fans to serve as my fellow reporters and editors,” Leitch said. “I think a lot of people out there were waiting for something like this. It puts a lot of fun back into sports.”
Yes, people were waiting on pins and needles for a well-financed, less idiosyncratic ripoff of Sports Frog.
(take it from me, pal, you won’t see 35, never mind be able to perform in the sack, if you don’t improve that blogging-while-watching TV posture).
Mallozzi, who most recently penned a questionable profile of an Illinois-obsessed chap (besides Will, I mean), seems to be of the opinion that Leitch’s chronic ethical lapses and predilection for easy targets are unworthy of examination. No point in killing a great American success story.
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01.27.06
Posted in History's Great Hook-Ups, Will Leitch Sucks, non-sporting journalism
at 4:03 pm
by GC
I don’t know if Oui Magazine is still publishing (editor’s note : I am really fucking old), but if they are, I don’t think this guy should hold his breath waiting for an invitation to contribute. (thanks to Charles Star for the link)
If reality stumbles when you learn that your girlfriend has had a threesome, it falls flat when you come face-to-face with the other parts of her carnal equation. As I watched the groom take his place near the priest/rabbi/guy with rented Bible, my brain went to three immediate destinations.
1. The last time we were “intimate.” It had been a long day, and I’d had a bit to drink. I wasn’t at my best. Let’s just leave it at that.
I can totally relate. If I spent the entire morning posting stories that other blogs had covered the previous evening, if not days or weeks earlier, I’d also be way too tired to fuck Will Leitch’s girlfriend.
Seriously. Ditch-diggers and wage slaves of the world, you have no idea how easy you’ve got it. Making fun of Ron Artest’s mental problems and calling Peyton Manning a closet case, now that’s hard labor.
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01.25.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 1:55 pm
by GC
As for “Family Guy,” on the whole, we’re torn. It seems like the television show equivalent of a bad blog to us; just a bunch of cultural references without much heart.
Withering criticism, to be sure. If this cartoon thing doesn’t work out for Seth McFarlane, presumably he has a job waiting for him at Gawker Media.
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Posted in Blogged Down, The Internet, Will Leitch Sucks
at 11:33 am
by GC
Good news, everyone! David Pinto of Baseball Musings will no longer run Google Ads as he opposes the search-engine monolith’s capitulation to Chinese authorities.
Pinto, however, continues to run a number of ads for ticket brokers. While none of these companies have been found guility of human rights violations, their carpet-bomb web pollution tactics and price gouging are hardly the sort of thing that makes the world a better place.
Still, I’m impressed with Pinto’s principled stance, and in solidarity, shall stop entering the phrase “amputee pics” into Google for the next 48 hours.
Full credit to David, however, for actually having advertisers. Will Leitch took the opportunity yesterday to ridicule the Senior Bowl’s claims that their website had been shut down due to “high traffic volumes”. Yeah, it was pretty hard to believe. Much like Deadspin’s repeated claims throughout the past month that they’d attracted advertisers….who weren’t actually advertising on the site.
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01.21.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 12:44 pm
by GC
…and I wanna meet the guy who’s handing out the dimes.
(I’d have gladly accepted, but Marlon Brando already sent it back)
You’re welcome.
Don’t mention it.
Anything to help
How is it that Sidearm Delivery is the only blog to feature this fetching button to the right of its daily content?
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01.17.06
Posted in Basketball, Sports Radio, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:06 pm
by GC
Showing the unique perspective of a guy far too busy to actually watch NBA games — having already bragged that he finds the regular season boring — ESPN Radio’s Colin Cowherd condemned Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant for their public expression of goodwill last night, declaring that the public wants…no, needs feuds and soap operas to remain engrossed.
To which I can only reply, the league somehow managed to survive Magic and Isiah smooching at midcourt. The only thing more contrived than last night’s hatchet burial is demanding that 99% of the players pretend they aren’t members of the same millionaire frat.
Speaking of contrived, Bill Simmons — though he didn’t actually hear the show himself — is convinced that Isiah Thomas has challenged him to a fight. Will Leitch, still referring to himself in the plural, writes “we can’t believe Isiah Thomas knows how to use a computer.” Said missive comes just a couple of months after Will gleefully penned the headline “Tyson Most Likely Celeb Who Can’t Read”.
I’m not saying Leitch is a brutal racist or anything. But given his fixation with questioning the intellectual capacity of prominent black men, he might wanna work a little harder at getting his facts right. Or at least cease with the html errors (unless he has a nice assistant for that kind of thing).
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01.07.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Football, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:47 pm
by GC
If anyone would like to explain to Will Leitch’s understudy that the F.A. Cup and the Scottish Cup are not the same tournament, please, be my guest. That’s presuming you can deal with a comments section that’s by invitation-only.
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01.06.06
Posted in Gridiron, Will Leitch Sucks
at 12:31 am
by GC
It cannot be argued that Washington RB Clinton Portis — in addition to setting a club rushing record with 1516 yards gained in ‘05 — has provided blogdom and the straight media alike with mucho grist for the wacko mill all season long.
But Portis could be funnier than Rick Shapiro smoking Richard Pryor’s ashes — that still doesn’t excuse the following queary by Will Leitch :
How can you not be rooting for the Redskins to go as far into the playoffs as possible?
Uh, Dan Snyder? The fact that they’re called the Redskins?
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01.05.06
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:39 pm
by GC
Writes Will Leitch, referencing a dubious study that claims to have determined which sport is most exciting (hint : the winner wasn’t NASCAR or kicking Will in the face),
There are so many problems with this study that enumerating them here would be like mocking a Jay Mohr column: So incredibly easy that it hardly seems sporting.
Indeed, giving Mohr a hard time in no way can be compared with the courage shown by Will in mocking those with Down’s Syndrome, depressed teens or the way he’s consistently gone after the universally beloved Stephen A. Smith.
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01.03.06
Posted in The World Of Entertainment, Will Leitch Sucks
at 2:22 pm
by GC
Predictably, Will Leitch is overcome with glee at reports that Dennis Rodman might be one of the captives on Channel 4’s “Celebrity Big Brother”, scheduled to hit UK TV screens this Thursday night. To which I must (predictably) snort, “who gives a fuck?”, particularly as said program is likely to feature the public comeback of The Godfather Of Light Entertainment, Michael Barrymore.
With that in mind, however, I do have some advice for the former Bulls/Pistons rebounding reprobate, if he chooses to participate : when Barrymore suggests going for a swim, you might want to decline.
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12.28.05
Posted in Blogged Down, Will Leitch Sucks
at 5:11 pm
by GC
With typical aplomb, Will Leitch (to say nothing of his cretinous readers) is in a tizzy today over a video of a Ball State undergrad stammering his way through a crap sports newscast.
Granted, it’s a funny video. Just as funny, in fact, when others linked to it in April of 2005. The only thing that could be funnier would be if it turned out the unfortunate would-be Mike Lynch had recently committed suicide.
Seems to me that if you’re gonna take the time to publicly ridicule someone for their complete and utter inability to function as a public speaker, you’d better have some chops of your own in said department. I’ve seen Will sweating bullets on ESPN2. I’ve heard his insomnia-cure cameos on Sports Bloggers Live. Suffice to say, if you had to choose from Radar O’Riley, Leon Spinks and Will Leitch for a recitation of the Gettysburg Address, the poetry of Robert Frost or just today’s blue plate specials, Will would come in third.
Ball State’s Brian Collins can take some solace in knowing that a few minutes of net video humilation is nothing compared to life as a Walking Blooper Reel.
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