Heyman Previews The World Series



OK, the Red Sox are well and truly fucked, because Newsday's Jon Heyman has picked them to win the World Series.

Not to jinx the Red Sox any more than they already are, but all signs point to this being Boston's year.

Any team that can outsmart Joe Torre, whip Mariano Rivera and Babe Ruth simultaneously, shut down and shut up Gary Sheffield and, with their backs to the Green Monster, beat the feared Yankees four straight has to win it all.

f Ruth still had any power left over the Red Sox, there's no way he lets the Yankees suffer the indignity of losing after being up 3-zip in games. Or, at the very least, he makes sure the Red Sox lose to the Astros of Roger "Twilight of His Career" Clemens or the Cubs of Nomar Garciaparra, Steve Bartman and the billy goat in the World Series. Now neither can happen.

St. Louis has no connection to Ruth and very little to do with the jinx, aside from helping to extend it in 1946 and 1967 by beating Boston in seven games in the World Series. St. Louis is a nice Midwestern city with nice Midwestern fans, any one of whom would be horrified by what goes on inside Boston's Animal House clubhouse.

What's going to happen on the field might not be pretty, either. Kevin Brown and Javy Vazquez will look like Hall of Famers after the Red Sox's relentless lineup gets through with Cardinals pitching. Speaking of Boston's hitters, one American League scout said, "They kill average pitching."

St. Louis has a staff full of that. The only thing above-average about the Cardinals' pitching is coach Dave Duncan, who coaxed nice years out of former Red Sox righthander Jeff Suppan (left off the playoff roster by Boston last year), Staten Island product Jason Marquis, Chris Carpenter (who's hurt) and Julian Tavarez, whose temper tantrum was child's play compared with Brown's.




That's not to say Boston's hurlers will be putting up a lot of zeroes, either, except maybe for its sutured-up ace, Curt Schilling (above). We have to give him credit for a valiant effort in ALCS Game 6, but if there are any sutures left over, will someone please stitch Schilling's mouth closed so we aren't subjected to his postgame proselytizing?

The one and only bad sign for the Red Sox was a stray quote or two regarding what they'd just accomplished -- such as Tom Werner, the TV guy who's part of club ownership, telling the Boston Herald, "The World Series is great, but we've done something historic."

That, of course, is exactly the kind of wrong-headed thinking they have to guard against now. Assuming Werner was speaking only for their eggheaded ownership contingent (how about those yellow ear plugs John Henry wore during the champagne dousing?), they should take this in six wild games.

Posted: Sat - October 23, 2004 at 04:49 PM      

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