Osama : Let's Make A Deal



CSTB's favorite news source, Fox, reports on the good word coming out of a hard-to-find cave.

A man purporting to be Al Qaeda terror leader Usama bin Laden offered a "truce" to European countries that do not attack Muslims in a recording broadcast Thursday on Arab satellite networks.

Saying the truce would begin when European soldiers leave Islamic nations, the voice also referenced the terror attacks on the United States and Spain, saying, "what happened on September 11 and March 11 was your goods delivered back to you."

"Security is a need for all humans and we could not let you have a monopoly on it for yourselves," the voice added. "People who are aware would not let their politicians jeopardize their security."




(just because security is a need for all humans, that doesn't mean this guy is allowed to touch you with his wand)

My advice to our allies in Europe is simple : take the deal.

I live around the corner from two 24 hour storage facilities and a host of .50 per hour internet cafes. Except none of them serve coffee....just a steady diet of insurgent thought and angry stares. You'd be angry, too, if you had been carrying bags and bags of fertilizer up many flights of stairs. Much as I hate the thought of negotiating with terrorists, perhaps there's an acceptable alternative for Osama to consider, eg. Safestore fixes the freight elevator and installs air conditioning for the summer months, Bin Laden's minions get free broadband and access to the chicken-cam ...and the rest of us can start sleeping at night.

Posted: Thu - April 15, 2004 at 10:55 AM      

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