02.26.09

Brendan Haywood Resists The Temptation To Treat A Reporter’s Skull Like Etan Thomas’

Posted in Basketball, Blogged Down, Medical Science at 10:13 pm by

DC Sports Bog‘s Dan Steinberg, previously maligned by former colleague Tony Kornheiser as “Cheese Boy”, neglects to identify the questioner pestering the Wizards’ injured Brendan Haywood below, but calls the conversation, “Enlightening. In the same way pouring 40 feet of mud-flecked chocolate pudding on top of your face would be enlightening.”

What are they talking about in terms of a timeline for you, and what are you looking at?

Don’t have a timeline. If I’m healthy, I’m back, but if I’m not, I’m not.

So there’s been no timeline set for you in terms of a return to play?

They said this injury takes four to six months, so it depends on am I a four-month guy, a five-month guy or a six-month guy. I don’t know yet.

Are you a four-month guy?

Not right now. It’s been four months.

So you’re a five-month guy?

Don’t know. I’m not gonna give you anything on TV tonight. Come on. Stop with me.

I hear ya. Hey, if you had your druthers, when would you be ready to go?

When I’m healthy. You’re gonna find a million and one ways to ask me the same question, huh?

A practice like today, a practice this physical, when do you think you might be ready for something like that?

Don’t know. I hate to keep hitting you with the same thing, but I really don’t know. I’ll be reevaluated in a couple weeks. This might be a good interview for my doctor, she knows better than me. She’s got the x-rays, the MRIs and everything. And she’s a specialist in this area, so she knows way better than me.

Is she a good quote?

I don’t know. She’s a doctor, she’s probably gonna be even more bland than me.

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