10.12.07

CFL Brutal Scuffle For Second Place Ends In Beauty Pageant

Posted in Gridiron, When Mascots Attack at 10:52 pm by

I knew it was confirmation I was definitely ready to leave Toronto when the list of things I wanted to do before I left started with: 1. Go to Hamilton and 2. Go to Montreal. Luckily number three was to see a CFL game before I cut out, and though I still didn’t have enough Air Miles after 9 years residence to take out my friends ” I figured what the hell. I can spend the $20 (note: 500 level SkyDome costs the same as 200 level for CFL games ” what?) for one last fling with Canadian sports.

Although the game was riveting ” Khalil Carter’s 68-yard (why not metre?) TD in the third, followed by his brief nap in the end-zone, was great ” the differences between CFL football and NFL football were distracting.

#1 problem: “Jason” the mascot talks. I appreciated his clamboring over a stool to allow us to be photographed together, but this whole talking mascot thing has got to stop. BJ Birdie was a huge violator of this mascot code as well. Is it a SkyDome thing? What the fuck? There was an inflatable Wendy’s Frosty running around the field at halftime ” though I don’t go for inflatables, I bet he would have known when to shut up.

#2: Sweet Caroline. Come on, people. Your weird early autumn semi-national pastime is not a Red Sox game. Or a minor league game out at Coney, for that matter. Why the fuck is this happening?

#3: If someone could please call Mr. Lukas in on this ” the Argos seem to dramatically change logos every one to six years. The best one features a football with stitches for oars. Why the fuck is this NOT happening?

Finally, the CFL seems to draw more gays than other Canadian sports. I mean in attendance in the stands. That’s what I mean.

Go Argos!

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