09.22.08

Cubs Dump on CSTB Night at Shea, Drawing First Blood from Mets and Themselves

Posted in Baseball, Internal Affairs at 6:53 pm by

http://www.senate.gov/artandhistory/history/resources/graphic/large/HaigAlexander.jpg

[CSTB blogger Ben Schwartz, assuming command of the blog]

Live Blogging 7:24 PST:  Well, the Mets are fighting back in the 9th (Delgado just grounded out to knock a run in), to make it 9-5.  Look, my wife is really serious now.  I told her I’m live blogging this thing on my blog, and she said “Are you getting paid for it?”  I said “no,” and that was it, you shoulda seen the look I got.  I gotta go out to that Brazilian place.  Anyway, don’t drive angry.

Live Blogging 7:17 PST:  Pitcher Jason Marquis hits a grand slam?  Felix Pie claims an RBI in the 9th?  It’s the latter play that compels me to raise the specter of illegal gambling, and to formally insist that the commissioner’s office investigate the Mets “throwing” this game.  Cubs lead 9-4, heading into the bottom of the 9th.

Live Blogging 6:38 PST:  Bottom of the 7th, Mets rebound on David Wright’s 33rd HR, which brings Jose Reyes in with him.  Cubs lead 8-4, and slugger Jason Marquis has been pulled for reliever Neal Cotts.  Btw, Jeremy Piven won an Emmy last night, and I think he deserved it, no matter what the tabloids say about him.

Live Blogging 6:25 PST:  The Cubs haven’t scored for two innings, and I just got a call from my wife that I’m going to go out and meet her at that Brazilian chicken place we like, so I may not be able to finish blogging the game.  But as things are going … well, anyway, there have been some rude remarks left in the comments section.  Trust me, the new CSTB isn’t going to tolerate that sort of thing.  This is a blog that will Maintain Order.  Anti-Cub comments will be deleted for the duration of Our Year.  And one commentor, “Marc,” advocating violence, might like to know that I am not at Shea Stadium, but in Los Angeles.  Even if the former absentee COO of CSTB were to throw a Bud Light at me, he would have to have a hell of an arm.

Live Blogging 5:55 PST:  Cubs lead the Mets 8-2 going into the bottom of the 5th, having picked up two more runs from a Derrek Lee HR in the 4th and series of knocks that sent Felix Pie (subbed for Reed Johnson) around the bases and home.

Btw, I’ve been looking for the opportunity to expand CSTB from simply a “sports blog” to one that also welcomes coin collecting topics across the board.  In our own way, coin collectors (or “change hounds,” as we like to call each other) are certainly “sportive.”  At the moment, I’m currently looking for an Indian head nickel with the corrupted Denver mint imprint, but NOT the 1904 “ nice try!  So if you have one, or just want to talk some coins, feel free to add some comments below.

Live Blogging 5:17 PST:  Struggling pitcher Jason Marquis hits grand slam to increase the Cub lead, 6-2.  That said, I hope the Cubs bench is taking into account that it would probably benefit Chicago to play the Mets in the play-offs, not the Phillies.

Live Blogging:  The Cubs manage to produce a run in the 2nd inning through old-fashioned, “inside” baseball run production, on hits, a walk, and then Mark DeRosa plating the virgin run of the game.  Then the Cubs threw a run away on a Jason Marquis wild pitch that allowed Carlos Delgado to score.  While CSTB is occupied waiting on-line, looking for Val Kilmer in the bleachers with Vince Coleman, or witnessing farewell performances by actors playing Howard Johnson and Mookie Wilson, CSTB readers need not worry.  In the worlds of Alexander Haig, “I’m in charge here.”

11 Responses to “Cubs Dump on CSTB Night at Shea, Drawing First Blood from Mets and Themselves”

  1. kt says:

    goddamn game isn’t on wgn. i guess if you’re al haig i’ll make like jimmy watt and go shit talk the beach boys, i got nothing better to do.

  2. Marc says:

    There have been 3 grand slams hit by pitchers in the past 5 years: all 3 at Shea, all 3 against the Mets, and 2 of them this year.

    I hope Gerard bashes you in the face with a $9 aluminum Bud Light bottle.

    Can you feel my excitement to fly up for the game at Shea on Saturday?

  3. Marc says:

    And by “bashes you in the face” I mean “tosses you off the upper deck”.

    It’s nothing personal, but I have nothing positive to say about the Cubs and their fans at the moment.

  4. Marc says:

    Ben, It’s not personal. When the Mets fail to make the playoffs, I’ll root for the Cubs. But until then, I loathe you and your clinching of a playoff spot and not phoning it in, etc!

  5. Ben Schwartz says:

    Marc: The Cubs are still playing for home field advantage in the post-season … since 1969, I think.

  6. Marc says:

    They have to win 1 game all week to guarantee home field, right?

    Do it after the 4 games at Shea goddamnit!

    (And I’m serious about rooting for the Cubs if the Mets fail to make it. I’d like to see a Rays-Cubs series all things considered)

  7. How many is a Brazilian?

  8. Ben Schwartz says:

    How many WHAT is a Brazilian, sir?

  9. Sorry, dumb, irrelevant joke. It’s been a long day.

    The Joke:

    The President receives a national security briefing.

    “Mr. President, twelve Brazilian soldiers were killed.”
    “That’s terrible. Uh, how many is a Brazilian?”

    Not worth it, i know.

    Amazing bomb by Marquis, though.

  10. Bjorn Randolph says:

    That joke would make more sense if you told it as “How many zeroes in a Brazilian?” But that’s justr a suggestion, far be it from me to tell you how to do comedy.

  11. Austin says:

    2 pitcher-hit grandslams in one season is bad. But two pitcher-hit grandslams in one game is way worse. And it has actually happened.

    Tony Cloninger, Atlanta Braves pitcher, hit two grandslams in one game against the Giants on July 3, 1966.

    Here is the boxscore:
    http://www.baseball-reference.com/boxes/SFN/SFN196607030.shtml

    Can’t imagine any team shooting itself in the foot worse than that.

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