(Above: The Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome)
Sigh. The Twins.
Seriously, enough with these pests. They’ve got more road miles than Magellan, the Indians and Rays took turns kicking their ass and when they got home, it was to Jesse Ventura’s state. Please. Denard Span? Kid’s got no big game experience, probably doesn’t even understand that it’s not normal to play big league baseball under a hefty bag. Kubel? He’s 0.95 agaisnt Javy, and his name sounds like a potato dish. Forget him. Mauer? Well, you can always walk him. Gomez? Swings at anything, already used up his homer against Javy this year. Morneau? Walk him, too. Casilla? He’s .143 against Horacio Ramirez, how good can he be? And Scott Baker. Come on. Totally hittable. Gets rattled with runners on. Owned by Cabrera and AJ. We got this one.
I’d take a page out of the Schwartz playbook and live-blog the game, but they don’t have wi-fi at the prayer meeting I’ll be at.