07.17.06

If Endorsing A Shit-Eater Is Wrong, David Doesn’t Wanna Be Wright

Posted in Baseball, Religion at 11:55 am by


(is Vito ready to get saved?)

Given this organ’s tendency to bash the fuck out of the New York Post’s buggy beard, it is only fair to acknowledge that Phil Mushnick is capable of quality work every solar eclipse or so.

So it’s Saturday afternoon and we’re watching the Mets on Ch. 11. They’re playing the Cubs in Wrigley, when, during a commercial break, David Wright, in his Mets uniform and standing in Shea, pops up to tell us:

“Hi, I’m David Wright. I invite you to the ‘Salvation Miracles Revival Crusade‘ with Dr. Jaerock Lee (above), at Madison Square Garden, July 27, 28 and 29.”

And then a graphic, giving the dates and printed in Spanish, appears.

Next we see footage of a man holding two crutches aloft, as if they were suddenly rendered needless by the Rev. Dr. Lee’s astonishing healing powers. And then a similarly miraculous story is told as we see an elderly woman walking across a stage, her abandoned wheelchair in the background.

Sorry, boys and girls, while we mean no offense toward anyone’s spirituality and religious devotion – Wright’s included – that was the weirdest player/team-connected TV ad we’d ever seen within a telecast of a big league game.

And are Mets telecasts and Mets dressed in their Mets uniforms now available to help deliver religious come-ons of any and all kinds?

But above and beyond all that, why is Wright telling us about the Rev. Dr. Lee? If this holy man can spring people from wheelchairs, shouldn’t Wright, at the very least, be telling Victor Zambrano?

Dr. Lee’s website features intense testimony, even by crazed evangelical standards :

To live, I’d drink even the liquid of feces!

Modern medical science was not able to heal me, so I used all sorts of folk remedies. I ate whatever was said to be good for my health. I even changed my name and invited a sorceress to perform an exorcism. But to make things worse, I got the rheumatic arthritis and I had to hide myself. In this terrible situation, I heard that the liquid of feces was good for recovering my health. Although its stench was unbearable, I drank it earnestly. But it was all in vain and my condition got so worse that others had to help me urinate and defecate. I didn’t know about God’s providence and tried many things in human way, only to see no hopeful result for the future. My wife frequently ran away from home and my beloved mother wished I would die. Nobody can imagine how sorrowful and painful it was!

David Wright has a rep for clean living and boy-next-door demeanor. So it’s pretty fucking hot that he’d be a paid spokesperson for a corophilia advocate.

7 Responses to “If Endorsing A Shit-Eater Is Wrong, David Doesn’t Wanna Be Wright”

  1. dave g. says:

    I too give Mushnick credit where it’s due. That Wright spot was unquestionably WTF, and more than a little creepy and/or misguided.

  2. GC says:

    it might be a little sobering for D.W.’s many male and female fans to admit this morning that he might be….how can I put this delicately?….a handsome moron? Brainless beefcake? Great at hititng/catching baseballs, hopeless at real-life decision making?

    That said, I have no idea how much he was paid to do the commercial in question. Everyone has their price. Mine, just to be very clear, is much cheaper than David Wright’s, and if any religious organizations that champion the ingestion of human feces would like to pay me or CSTB to shill on their behalf, no problemo.

  3. Repoz says:

    I now hear that Edgardo Alfonzo did a Salvation Miracles Revival squat…in his civies.

    I guess they don’t make minor league eat-away uniforms yet.

  4. GC says:

    this is a heck of a way for the Mets to earn tip money. I guess autograph sessions at Last Licks aren’t as lucrative as i thought

    http://www.cantstopthebleeding.com/?p=5797

  5. wisdomweasel says:

    Isn’t “the liquid of feces” rendered in script under the “Coors Field” sign?

  6. john says:

    if you read the bible you would realize that god does heal through faith. it is common knowledge. furthermore, 75% of the guys playing baseball are devot Christians, why do you think they are pointing at the sky after a homerun. you guys are poking at christianity but don’t realize that most of the players you are watching on tv are devot Christians and probably believe that healing through faith is possible.

  7. GC says:

    I’ll tell you what, John, I’ll give the bible (yet another) reading just as soon as you check out the dictionary. There’s no such word as “devot”. “Devoted” is a word. As is “devout”. Devo is an excellent band from Akron, OH.

    Best of luck with the healing.

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