12.13.12

If The Attorney General Can Summon 12 Bodyguards, Surely Matthew Modine Should Have Twice That Many

Posted in Basketball at 4:34 pm by

During last night’s coverage of the 12/12/12 Sandy Benefit at MSG, Brian Williams remarked (repeatedly) that one “couldn’t swing a dead cat” without clobbering a big name celeb, and given the fundraiser’s phone bank at one point included Walt Frazier, Allan Houston, John Starks and Amare Stoudemire, you also couldn’t swing a dead cat without hitting inactive Knicks being paid top dollar by James Dolan.  Still, these are exciting, credibility-resurrecting times for Dolan’s NBA franchise, with the team off to such a solid start, hardly anyone is holding America’s worst blues guitarist accountable for doing nothing to solve the NHL lockout.   Given that it oughta take more than two months of inspired basketball to wipe out all the damage done during Dolan’s ownership, former NY Times writer Selena Roberts — author of “A-Rod: The Many Lives of Alex Rodriguez” —- recalls one of the press-phobic genetic lottery winner’s more embarrassing moments (thought there are plenty to choose from) (link swiped from Ball Don’t Lie’s Kelly Dwyer) :

On one game night in 2003, two dapper gentlemen were sitting at a table in the suite, circled by 12 security guards with earpieces. Real motorcade stuff. In walks Dolan.
Observers in the room saw Jim stop and stare at the scene. He then crooked his finger at a Garden official, which, with Dolan, is always code for: Get the hell over here. In a conversation in front of several guests — and in detail that has become Garden lore among employees — Dolan had the following discussion:
“Who are they?” says Jim, eyeballing the two distinguished-looking gentlemen. He was told the two men were important foreign dignitaries.
“Who are all the other guys,” asks Jim.
“They’re secret service.”
“They can’t have 12 bodyguards,” says Jim, now completely irritated. “I don’t care who they are. I have one bodyguard and I’m the owner of the goddamn team.”
“Well,” says the Garden executive, overheard trying to lighten the mood, “You’ll have to call John Ashcroft and tell him they can’t have 12.”
And then Jim says (wait for it, wait for it), “Who’s John Ashcroft?”

Given that Dolan’s more of a Joe Walsh kinda guy, could you really expect him to recognize the dude from The Verve?

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