07.01.08

Madge Rumors Reveal A Chink In A-Rod’s P.R. Armor

Posted in Baseball, History's Great Hook-Ups at 4:54 pm by

I’m no Howard Rubenstein, but I’ve been around the block enough times to know there are efficient means of asserting one’s heterosexuality in public, and other methods that just look totally fucking desperate.  Let’s review some of The Third Baseman’s more questionable decisons ;

* – BEING PHOTOGRAPHED IN CENTRAL PARK SANS SHIRT

Not the smartest move, but hey, it was hot that day. Outside of the clubhouse ribbing, no real harm was done.  Grade : C-

* – BEING PHOTOGRAPHED IN THE COMPANY OF A STRIPPER

Under the circumstances, a little too obvious.  Grade : D+

* – SLAPPING DEATH WISH WITH A PURSE

Just one of those heat-of-the-moment things, and if it were to happen again, you know Alex would spear Arroyo in the midsection, helmet-first.  Just the way Larry Bowa drew it up.  Grade : C+

* – BEING ROMANTICALLY LINKED WITH MADONNA (49)

I’m sorry, but this is right up there with Randy Travis marrying his own mom. Short of pulling a Jim McGreevey, the only thing A-Rod could do that would confirm invite further speculation would be leaving Cynthia for Judy Garland’s corpse. Grade : F

One Response to “Madge Rumors Reveal A Chink In A-Rod’s P.R. Armor”

  1. Ben Schwartz says:

    How does being photographed in Central Park without a shirt constitute a hetero move? I don’t remember Piazza ever doing that.

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