04.26.08

NFL Draft First Round : Happy National Mel Kiper Jr. Day, Everyone!

Posted in Gridiron, Sports TV at 5:50 pm by

(guys’ day out!)

I’m not even gonna tackle the delicious ironing of the scene outside Radio City Music Hall being such a wonderful argument for wartime conscription, but let’s just say the plethora of dudes wearing NFL jerseys all over midtown today will not cause the casual onlooker to mistake this for Fashion Week.

The New York Post referred to the Falcons’ first round pick (no. 3 overall), QB Matt Ryan (BC) as “the antithesis of Michael Vick”. Which either means he’s a pocket passer, immobile, loves puppies, is super dull or is a white guy. OK, he’s not wearing an orange jumpsuit, either, but the same could be said of Joe Flacco (Delaware), selected no. 18 overall by the Ravens. If you’re trying to comfort Baltimore season ticket holders, describing their new QB as “the antithesis of Kyle Boller” is a nice place to start. If this leaves Brian Brohm in the role of 2008′s Brady Quinn, give the former credit for not being in New York this afternoon.

As of 5:30pm EST, the Modell’s at Grand Central Station had yet to receive stock on Vernon Gholston jerseys. I think this qualifies as a blown business opportunity.

I was tired of hearing Darren McFadden being called “Run DMC” about a week ago, much as I don’t quite get the Adrian Peterson comparisions. McFadden could well be an impact player, don’t get me wrong, be he’s not been injured on the field nearly as much as Purple Jesus.

Possibly because I am too hungover to make intelligent decisions today, I’ve largely stuck with ESPN’s draft coverage in favor of The Rich Eisen Project. Sadly, I think there’s something missing from The Worldwide Leader’s presentation. A certain lispy malevolence. Perhaps next April, the NFL Network will allow Bill Romanowski to make a triumphant return to premium basic cable.

I have no idea why Elvis Costello’s “Alison” is playing over the Radio City tannoy between selections number 32 and 33. I always figured Roger Goodell to be more of a Graham Parker & The Rumor kinda guy.

One Response to “NFL Draft First Round : Happy National Mel Kiper Jr. Day, Everyone!”

  1. KD says:

    On behalf of Brinsley Schwarz, I have to point out that you missed an Anglo “u” in “Rumour.”

    By the by, the two Rumours albums (sans Graham) are pretty good stuff.

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