Colts 19, Bears 14 (3:54 remaining, 3rd quarter)
(anybody taking odds on Morris Day for the MLS All-Star Game halftime show?)
It would be the understatement of the night to say the elements have played havoc with this fumblerooski fest. And I have to question the NFL’s level of preperation —- surely they could’ve asked diminutive strongman David Samson to singlehandedly construct a roof during Prince’s halftime show?
I realize I’m not gonna win any awards for live blogging, but Sportsline’s Gregg Doyel is having a Garo Yepremian-esque Super Bowl. For instance, “I really think Deadspin readers might like me. I’m snarky like Will Leitch.” “Remember how I called ESPN’s Sal Paolantonio something between ‘aggressive’ and ‘felonious’ as a basketball player? I think he’s mad at me. I just got the evil eye and a wincing hello.”
One of the keys to this self-referential shit is that the person responsible should be halfway interesting in their own right. Or at least not so completely transparent in their desperate attempts to fashion a personality cult out of thin air. Not that I would know anything about such subjects, but it blows my mind that Doyel — attending the fucking Super Bowl, folks — is using his valuable laptop time to look up personal details about Deadspin commentators who are making fun of him. Hey, I’m not above doing the same thing, but that sort of behavior is a) not something an adult would brag about and b) is best devoted to the hours of say, two or three a.m., as opposed to the 2nd quarter of THE BIGGEST SINGLE SPORTING EVENT ON EARTH.
If any of you amateurs would like press credentials to say, the Final Four, Kentucky Derby, Daytona 500 or Stanley Cup Finals, be sure let the authorities know that you intend to use the event as an excuse to further some bizzaro personal agenda. Lord knows, Sportsline’s traffic and advertising revenues are glued to Doyel’s ability to keep up his end of a worked feud. Not with Will Leitch, mind you, but Will Leitch’s acolytes. No paraphrase Dan Zanes, “good luck to all bloggers.”
Except Gregg Doyel.
Who knew that Steve Lyons had experience building websites?