While a more responsible sports blog would concern itself today with Syracuse’s narrow first-round escape over UNC-Ashville, or perhaps Portland waiving Greg Oden and firing Nate McMillan on the same day, instead we’ll concern ourselves with the exploits of former Blazer Zach Randolph, whose frequent brushes with authority have made him a favorite figure around these parts.  The Oregonian’s Rick Bella has obtained some 158 pages of Clackamas County (OR) reports on police activity at Randolph’s West Linn mansion, with the alleged beatdown of weed dealer James Ruben Beasley as the article’s most meaty portion.

The Clackamas County incident began when Randolph, 30, threw a Willamette River cruise party for nearly 100 guests on the Portland Spirit tour boat. Beasley was invited because his good friend, Cameron C. Cox, 29, served as live-in caretaker for Randolph’s five-acre estate and 5,321-square-foot home on Southwest Turner Road.

While on the cruise, Beasley, who grows medical marijuana, told Randolph he had a small amount he could sell and was invited to an “after party,” where about 20 people gathered at Randolph’s home, police reported. But when Beasley offered Randolph a half-ounce for $120 Randolph balked, Beasley told police, saying it was too expensive.

Beasley told police he didn’t think Randolph would object to the higher-than-normal price because of his “millionaire status.”

“That is when Zach ‘aggressively’ snatched the marijuana out of James’ hands and yelled to other people at the house to get him (James) out of the house,” reports said.

Beasley told deputies that “six or seven” men who were “body-guarding” Randolph then surrounded him and hustled him outside, punching and kicking him. At least one hit him with the butt end of a pool cue, leaving him in a bloody heap on the front porch.

Two friends drove Beasley home, and the next day, after suffering nausea and headaches, he was treated at Adventist Medical Center. Beasley’s mother, Shigeko Beasley, called police, who obtained a warrant to search Randolph’s home.

Once inside, deputies found Randolph in bed with a woman and ordered both to “show me your hands.” The woman complied, but Randolph continued to hold his hands behind his pillow and under the covers until one of the deputies, concerned they were heading into a physical confrontation, pointed his handgun at Randolph, reports say.

In the ensuing hours of interviews, two women — one a flight attendant — gave police false names. All those present denied any knowledge of drugs, despite the strong smell of marijuana in the air, or knowledge of the beating.