11.12.10

Toronto Scribe To Bosh : Let Me Count The Ways In Which You Suck

Posted in Basketball at 6:58 pm by

The morning after being posterized by Rajon Rondo , it’s unlikely Heat F/C/scapegoat Chris Bosh is in the mood for much tough love from a Toronto columnist. And to be fair, the Globe & Mail’s Michael Granger does stick up for Bosh a little, testifying the defensively-challenged Texas, “isn’t the most narcissistic and obnoxious-seeming guy on his new team “ not by a long shot.”

Somewhere Bosh, for all his efforts to interact with fans via Twitter and YouTube and Facebook forgot the essence of it; which is “ as in any interaction “ try to imagine walking even half-a-kilometer in the other person™s knock-off Guccis.

Teasing fans with the idea that they might have some say where you™re going to sign as a free agent doesn™t cut it. Musing about winning an MVP award before winning your first playoff series doesn™t cut it. Starring in your own DVD about your own tattoo doesn™t cut it.

Implying that all those 20-and-10s you put it up in Toronto were stats in the proverbial forest because they weren™t on US television doesn™t cut it; and complaining that one of the hardships of life on the wild white frontier “ in Bosh™s case a luxury condominium building over-looking Lake Ontario to the south and the lights of one of North America™s most sophisticated cities to the East “ was that he “couldn™t get the good cable”, doesn™t cut it.

Of the Heat’s identity crisis, the Miami Herald’s Greg Cote opines, ‘this team needs real coaching, and that is what puts the onus on Erik Spoelstra.” As opposed to, y’know, Pat Riley hinting he might grab the reigns if shit got out of hand. That’s not onus-esque in the slightest!

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