Harsh enough that Dodgers fans endured watching their heroes get swept by the Snakes earlier this week ; ownership has decided in their infinite wisdom that pestering Lt. Dangle for his autograph shall remain the exclusive privilege of those holding the most expensive tickets. Suitable outraged, the LA Times’ T.J. Simers directs his ire towards former Larry Lucchino crony Dr. Charles Steinberg.
Called The Dentist, the Dodgers’ new PR guy, and he said nothing has changed for the kids, but “we’ve had vigorous debate today about it. We need more data.”
Happy to oblige.
Kyle Daniels: “The move by the Parking Lot Attendant to ‘secure’ the box seats from autograph-seeking fans is flat-out LAME! If kids are alienated from the game, what do we have left — although maybe we should keep the kids away from some of these players and their bad influences. Why don’t the players look out for their fans, the kids who sleep next to their gloves in their rooms decorated in Dodger blue?”
Eddie Alvarez: “How about pay toilets next? But only outside Aisle 40 and 41, and anything above field level.”
Josh Latzer: “I was one of those parents who had to explain to an 8-year-old daughter why she would not be getting an autograph. . . . Just another sad, pathetic reminder to the youth of today that money isn’t everything, it’s the only thing. Shame on you Dodgers.”
The Dentist said discussions continue within the organization. “We’re hearing two sides and trying to bring it to a resolution,” he said. “We’re all ears.”
So we know the Dodgers’ new PR guy is hard of hearing. Try e-mailing him at firstname.lastname@example.org see if he can read.
“[The Dentist] was legendary here in Bean Town,” wrote Dave Cook. “I am sure you are already seeing his magic at work.”
I know he can make kids disappear.
“To deprive certain children from getting autographs,” wrote Joel Delgadillo, “just because they’re not holding the right ticket stub? What the heck is this world coming to?”
Lest anyone come away believing the Dodgers are the majors’ only organization that maintains a caste system for their paying customers, trying moving from the upper deck and Shea Stadium to a lower level box seat during the 8th or 9th inning of a poorly attended midweek blowout in April. Even in setting far less rarified than Chavez Ravine, there’s not much common sense.